He snapped at her at breakfast. She brought up a past mistake. He walked out angry. She left without saying good-bye. Just one day in an ordinary marriage. But what if things could be different? What if the ordinary moments of annoyance, conflict, pain, or cold indifference could become moments to understand God's incredible agenda for love and begin something new? This book offers a simple, yet powerful prescription for changing marriages one ordinary moment at a time. Change begins with understanding how and why small disagreements evolve into major problems, taking practical steps to love one another more effectively, and learning how to take those same steps over and over again. Interactions that used to devolve into pointless annoyances and fights can become opportunities for God's love to become increasingly evident and powerful. Winston T. Smith takes abstract, biblical principles and applies them to the concrete details of life so that ordinary marriages can become extraordinary.
Marriage Matters
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Editorial Reviews
Review
Winston Smith show us how the transcendent purposes of God are at work in the midst of the seemingly mundane moments of our marriage. There is perhaps no greater garden in which the fruit of the Spirit grows in our lives than the garden of our marriage. Winston helps us see how God is at work in every aspect of our marriage to bring our need for His grace in our lives to the surface and in the process, to conform us to the image of His Son. --Bob Lepine Co-Host, FamilyLife Today
Winston Smith reminds us that there are no ordinary moments in a marriage. With a wonderful understanding of the grace the Lord exhibits in small things, Smith gives us the resources to understand our heart s response to ordinary moments with our spouse in order to create an extraordinary marriage. --Bryan Chapell, Ph.D. President and Professor Practical Theology at Covenant Theological Seminary, St Louis, Missouri; author of Each for the Other: Marriage as It's Meant to Be
Marriage Matters is a biblical look at the spiritually formative aspects of marriage; true to Scripture, insightful, and convicting in all the right ways. Winston Smith has written a fine volume on the way God uses marriage to shape our souls. --Gary Thomas Author of Sacred Marriage and Pure Pleasure --Gary Thomas - Author of Sacred Marriage and Pure Pleasure
Winston Smith reminds us that there are no ordinary moments in a marriage. With a wonderful understanding of the grace the Lord exhibits in small things, Smith gives us the resources to understand our heart s response to ordinary moments with our spouse in order to create an extraordinary marriage. --Bryan Chapell, Ph.D. President and Professor Practical Theology at Covenant Theological Seminary, St Louis, Missouri; author of Each for the Other: Marriage as It's Meant to Be
Marriage Matters is a biblical look at the spiritually formative aspects of marriage; true to Scripture, insightful, and convicting in all the right ways. Winston Smith has written a fine volume on the way God uses marriage to shape our souls. --Gary Thomas Author of Sacred Marriage and Pure Pleasure --Gary Thomas - Author of Sacred Marriage and Pure Pleasure
Winston Smith reminds us that there are no ordinary moments in a marriage. With a wonderful understanding of the grace the Lord exhibits in small things, Smith gives us the resources to understand our heart s response to ordinary moments with our spouse in order to create an extraordinary marriage. --Bryan Chapell, Ph.D. President and Professor Practical Theology at Covenant Theological Seminary, St Louis, Missouri; author of Each for the Other: Marriage as It's Meant to Be
Marriage Matters is a biblical look at the spiritually formative aspects of marriage; true to Scripture, insightful, and convicting in all the right ways. Winston Smith has written a fine volume on the way God uses marriage to shape our souls. --Gary Thomas Author of Sacred Marriage and Pure Pleasure --Gary Thomas - Author of Sacred Marriage and Pure Pleasure
Winston Smith reminds us that there are no ordinary moments in a marriage. With a wonderful understanding of the grace the Lord exhibits in small things, Smith gives us the resources to understand our heart s response to ordinary moments with our spouse in order to create an extraordinary marriage. --Bryan Chapell, Ph.D. President and Professor Practical Theology at Covenant Theological Seminary, St Louis, Missouri; author of Each for the Other: Marriage as It's Meant to Be
Marriage Matters is a biblical look at the spiritually formative aspects of marriage; true to Scripture, insightful, and convicting in all the right ways. Winston Smith has written a fine volume on the way God uses marriage to shape our souls. --Gary Thomas Author of Sacred Marriage and Pure Pleasure --Gary Thomas - Author of Sacred Marriage and Pure Pleasure
About the Author
Winston T. Smith, M.Div., is a counselor and faculty member at the Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation (CCEF) and has extensive experience as a marriage and family counselor. In addition to the Marriage Matters book, he is also the author of two Marriage Matters companion products: Marriage Matters Manual Facilitators Guide, and Marriage Matters Study Guide. Additionally, he is the author of the minibooks, Divorce Recovery: Growing and Healing God's Way; Help for Stepfamilies: Avoiding the Pitfalls and Learning to Love; It's All About Me: The Problem with Masturbation; and Who Does the Dishes? Decision Making in Marriage.
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More About the Author
Winston T. Smith, M.Div., is a faculty member and counselor at CCEF (the Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation), has extensive experience as a marriage and family counselor, and teaches seminary students how to counsel couples. He is the author of the minibooks, Divorce Recovery: Growing and Healing God's Way; Help for Stepfamilies: Avoiding the Pitfalls and Learning to Love; It's All About Me: The Problem with Masturbation; Who Does the Dishes? Decision Making in Marriage; and Burned Out? Trusting God with Your "To-Do" List.
Customer Reviews
“ I highly recommend this book to couples whether they are planning on getting married or if they have been married for years and want to improve their relationship. ”
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
11 of 11 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
Marriage Matters is written by Dr. Winston Smith a counselor and faculty member at CCEF (Christian Counseling Education Foundation). Having read several books by New Growth Press, the publishing arm of CCEF, I eagerly awaited reading Marriage Matters and it did not disappoint. In fact, this book exceeded my expectation which is something that rarely every happens.
Having read widely on the topic of marriage, I can honestly say Marriage Matters is the one of the best marriage book I have ever read right along with Dr. Paul Tripp's book, What did you expect?
Marriage Matters is a book that can be used in seminary classrooms, Sunday school class, or read for devotions. I recommend this book not only for married couples but also for singles to learn what a God honoring marriage is.
Typically most marriage books will focus on a few problems with marriages and then seek to offer solutions to those problems by appealing mostly to secular models. Marriage Matters; however, is different from vast majority of marriage books, I have read in that it does not load you down with self-help but rather explains what the Bible teaches on topics related to marriage. Along the way, Mr. Smith offers personal stories and examples from his own marriage which helpfully illustrate the point he is making.
It is not often that I read a book that is not only very well written as this is, but is also written from a biblical-theological framework that brings honor to Christ and accomplishes its intended purpose. Marriage Matters not only accomplishes its goal, but in the view of this reviewer exceeds it. Marriage Matters simply put is one of the best books I have read on marriage ever, as well as one of the best books I have read all year.
Beware of reading Marriage Matters! It will confront the issues of your heart with the Word of God and the Gospel of Jesus Christ. This is a book I will be recommending to all my married and single friends. Whether you are newly married or you've been married a long time, I recommend you read this book for the sake of your sanctification individually and for the sanctification of your marriage.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the New Growth Press book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255 : "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."
Having read widely on the topic of marriage, I can honestly say Marriage Matters is the one of the best marriage book I have ever read right along with Dr. Paul Tripp's book, What did you expect?
Marriage Matters is a book that can be used in seminary classrooms, Sunday school class, or read for devotions. I recommend this book not only for married couples but also for singles to learn what a God honoring marriage is.
Typically most marriage books will focus on a few problems with marriages and then seek to offer solutions to those problems by appealing mostly to secular models. Marriage Matters; however, is different from vast majority of marriage books, I have read in that it does not load you down with self-help but rather explains what the Bible teaches on topics related to marriage. Along the way, Mr. Smith offers personal stories and examples from his own marriage which helpfully illustrate the point he is making.
It is not often that I read a book that is not only very well written as this is, but is also written from a biblical-theological framework that brings honor to Christ and accomplishes its intended purpose. Marriage Matters not only accomplishes its goal, but in the view of this reviewer exceeds it. Marriage Matters simply put is one of the best books I have read on marriage ever, as well as one of the best books I have read all year.
Beware of reading Marriage Matters! It will confront the issues of your heart with the Word of God and the Gospel of Jesus Christ. This is a book I will be recommending to all my married and single friends. Whether you are newly married or you've been married a long time, I recommend you read this book for the sake of your sanctification individually and for the sanctification of your marriage.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the New Growth Press book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255 : "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars
Finally, a truly God-loving, Gospel-centered, Biblically grounded, and Practial book on marriage
November 23, 2010
Format:Paperback
There are tons of books that claim to help you in your marriage, but this book is truly one of its kind in helping us find a true purpose in marriage (why it matters), and once that purpose is found we can expect mutual support and growth in marriage. This book is amazingly challenging that problems in marriage, "ordinary problems", rather than just being liabilities of marriage but they can be redeem, in the light of the Gospel, to be assets to help us change for the better if we seize the opportunities to understand what do these problems revealed about us, our hearts, and our relationship with our spouse.
God-loving - marriage is not just an intimate relationship between man and woman loving each other, but both husband and wife loving God together in mutual support, mutual growth, and working towards a God-loving marriage. God is the ultimate care-taker in our lives, even in our marriage!
The author outlines ways to engage and enjoy our marriage, even in conflict-solving, forgiving one another, mutual support, and how to turn our Gospel-centered faith into Gospel-centered lives in our marriage.
Problems are opportunities to understand each other better, help each other, and rely on the redemptive grace of Christ together. This book is a must for all Christians who wants to have a truly Biblical marriage in their lives.
God-loving - marriage is not just an intimate relationship between man and woman loving each other, but both husband and wife loving God together in mutual support, mutual growth, and working towards a God-loving marriage. God is the ultimate care-taker in our lives, even in our marriage!
The author outlines ways to engage and enjoy our marriage, even in conflict-solving, forgiving one another, mutual support, and how to turn our Gospel-centered faith into Gospel-centered lives in our marriage.
Problems are opportunities to understand each other better, help each other, and rely on the redemptive grace of Christ together. This book is a must for all Christians who wants to have a truly Biblical marriage in their lives.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
I now have three, primary "go to" books for premarital and marital counseling:
"When Sinners Say `I Do'" by Dave Harvey, "What Did You Expect?" by Paul Tripp, and most recently, this book by Winston T. Smith. Smith is on staff at CCEF (Christian Counseling Education Foundation) and has done married couples a great service through this book.
By first reminding us that God is in the ordinary moments of life, Smith helps husbands and wives refocus on those kinds of ordinary moments to change their marriage for the better. I think the most helpful part of this first section of Smith's book is how he has the reader asking, "What do I worship? Who do I worship?" The answer to these two questions will determine the direction the marriage will take from that point onward.
Looking to Christ and the extraordinary love shown to us by Christ brings the second section of the book into even sharper focus. How you view your spouse, how honest you are in your marriage, whether you see conflict as something to be avoided or faced head-on regardless of the consequences, even how you forgive or seek forgiveness all have to do with how you see Christ and how He has regarded you. Put Christ on the periphery, and your marriage is in for big trouble. Exult in the extraordinary love Christ has shown us, and these parts of your marriage will start to take shape in a way which honors God.
Grace is what sustains us throughout. It's what enables us to see ordinary moments as extraordinary because God is in them. In the third and final section of the book Smith really shines. Chapter 16, "Growing in Grace," along with Chapters 12 & 13 are worth the price of the book alone.
Throughout, Smith brings examples from his own marriage to light, alongside those of couples he has counseled. I found these encouraging - they're just like me and my marriage. If God can work in them, He can work in me.
I highly recommend Marriage Matters to you. It will help your own marriage. It will help you in seeking to encourage or counsel others in their marriage. This is a "must have" book for your library.
I received this book for review purposes only; no compensation was provided by the publisher.
"When Sinners Say `I Do'" by Dave Harvey, "What Did You Expect?" by Paul Tripp, and most recently, this book by Winston T. Smith. Smith is on staff at CCEF (Christian Counseling Education Foundation) and has done married couples a great service through this book.
By first reminding us that God is in the ordinary moments of life, Smith helps husbands and wives refocus on those kinds of ordinary moments to change their marriage for the better. I think the most helpful part of this first section of Smith's book is how he has the reader asking, "What do I worship? Who do I worship?" The answer to these two questions will determine the direction the marriage will take from that point onward.
Looking to Christ and the extraordinary love shown to us by Christ brings the second section of the book into even sharper focus. How you view your spouse, how honest you are in your marriage, whether you see conflict as something to be avoided or faced head-on regardless of the consequences, even how you forgive or seek forgiveness all have to do with how you see Christ and how He has regarded you. Put Christ on the periphery, and your marriage is in for big trouble. Exult in the extraordinary love Christ has shown us, and these parts of your marriage will start to take shape in a way which honors God.
Grace is what sustains us throughout. It's what enables us to see ordinary moments as extraordinary because God is in them. In the third and final section of the book Smith really shines. Chapter 16, "Growing in Grace," along with Chapters 12 & 13 are worth the price of the book alone.
Throughout, Smith brings examples from his own marriage to light, alongside those of couples he has counseled. I found these encouraging - they're just like me and my marriage. If God can work in them, He can work in me.
I highly recommend Marriage Matters to you. It will help your own marriage. It will help you in seeking to encourage or counsel others in their marriage. This is a "must have" book for your library.
I received this book for review purposes only; no compensation was provided by the publisher.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars
best book on marriage
Most books written about marriage are focused on understanding your mate and learning how to communicate. Read more
Published 2 months ago by Marilyn Wall
5.0 out of 5 stars
A Sturdy Book on a True Foundation
Marriage Matters: Extraordinary Change through Ordinary Moments.
It is not good grammar to begin a book review with Wow. I need to say it anyway. Read more
It is not good grammar to begin a book review with Wow. I need to say it anyway. Read more
Published 3 months ago by TheophilusFarrell4
5.0 out of 5 stars
Refreshing
Winston's first book is a home-run. Marriage Matters drives past the trendy cliches of popular marriage self-help directly to the heart of understanding marriage conflict. Read more
Published 4 months ago by David Tolbert
5.0 out of 5 stars
A Love Problem is a God Problem
No matter what culture says, there is no doubt that marriage is an important foundation of society. Regardless of race, religion, political, or social background marriage exists... Read more
Published 11 months ago by Paul Emery
4.0 out of 5 stars
Good read for married couples of a couple years
"Marriage Matters" is written by Winston T. Smith, is a counselor and faculty member at the Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation (CCEF). Read more
Published 18 months ago by Paul Simpson
5.0 out of 5 stars
Another great book from New Growth Press
I've read a few books on marriage now that I'm actually married (notably The Mystery of Marriage and What Did You Expect?) but I think so far I might like this one the best. Read more
Published on April 8, 2011 by Nathaniel Claiborne
5.0 out of 5 stars
Essential Life Lessons
Reading Winston Smith's book, Marriage Matters, is like picking up ordinary grey pebbles and turning them over to find they're really glistening gems. Read more
Published on January 20, 2011 by Georgia Ludgate
5.0 out of 5 stars
Great resource!
Very encouraging book! Does a great job combining practical and theological ideals of marraige. My husband and I will start using it in our premarital and marital counseling!
Published on January 20, 2011 by Becca
5.0 out of 5 stars
Very Helpful (personally and pastorally)
This book - and I'm about 3/4 of the way through it - is helpful and engaging. It is easy to read and logically laid out. Read more
Published on January 20, 2011 by Herb Hunter
5.0 out of 5 stars
Must Have!!!
This is an amazing gospel centered book that will change your marriage. Winston Smith is an amazing author that is has a gift for focusing on the heart of the reader and dealing... Read more
Published on January 20, 2011 by Lilangels
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