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Married to the Military: A Survival Guide for Military Wives, Girlfriends, and Women in Uniform Paperback – July 14, 2009


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Married to the Military: A Survival Guide for Military Wives, Girlfriends, and Women in Uniform + Separated By Duty, United In Love (revised): Guide to Long Distance Relationships for Military Couples (Updated) + The 5 Love Languages Military Edition: The Secret to Love That Lasts
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 224 pages
  • Publisher: Touchstone; Revised edition (July 14, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1439150265
  • ISBN-13: 978-1439150269
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.6 x 8.4 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (147 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #302,939 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

"For someone new to military life, adjusting can sometimes be overwhelming. Married to the Military provides great information and a commonsense approach that will help military wives and significant others make the best of their experiences." -- Sylvia Kidd, director of family programs for the Association of the U.S. Army (AUSA) and spouse of the Sergeant Major of the Army (Ret.)

About the Author

Meredith Leyva is the founder and editor of CinCHouse.com, the Internet’s largest community for military wives and women in uniform. Leyva currently resides with her family in Norfolk, Virginia, where her husband is stationed aboard the USS Enterprise.

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Customer Reviews

I recommend this book to all military wives.
F. Y. Tuck
The book is nothing more than a shameless plug for the author's website.
Modern educated military wife
It gave a lot of great information and specifics that were very useful.
Melanie Riggs

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

66 of 73 people found the following review helpful By Annabelle Campbell on August 10, 2005
Format: Paperback
I bought this book because I thought the cover was cute--but that should have been my first notice that the insides would be worthless.

Every other page is filled with "check out my website for more help!" So I did, since the contents of the book certainly didn't contain any of the info I was searching for. What I found was far from helpful. The website is filled with cute designs, sappy stories, and that's about it. Upon venturing into the forums, however, I was appalled.

Phrases like "Filthy raghead" and "queer homos" littered the message boards. While the author of the book and her team of moderators are frequent visitors, they did nothing to remove these posts, therefor leading me to believe that they condone these thoughts. The drama is worse than high school.

PLEASE do not buy this book. The information contained in it is trivial--as a Navy girlfriend of less than 2 years, I knew everything in the book, due to common sense or a simple google search. It encourages young girls to revoke their life in order to support their husbands, which is not only wrong, but pathetic.

There are plenty of good books out there. This is not one of them.
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54 of 62 people found the following review helpful By itsmemissab on December 10, 2003
Format: Paperback
Having been an Army wife for 2 years and a fiancee for 2 years before that, I am always looking to learn more about how to cope with the difficulties of military life. My mother picked up this book for me because the cute cover caught her eye. Unfortunately, the cover is the only good thing about this book.
The author's tone is condescending throughout the book, and she talks down to readers, which is a real turn-off. Ms. Leyva obviously has no idea of the day to day struggles of average enlisted wives. Some of the information provided is false. [...] The book gives some cutesy information about how to act and how wonderful it is to support your man *rolls eyes*
Save your money, ladies! There are better books out there that will prepare you for the real military life...not the rosy picture painted in books.
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35 of 41 people found the following review helpful By Navy Spouse on August 10, 2005
Format: Paperback
Basically, a shameless plug for the website, which isn't any different than the many others out there doing the same thing. The Chat Forums are full of ignorant and uneducated children who give out bad information left and right, which they probably got from the book. The book itself is not much, most of the information can be found on the web or at your local Family Support Center.
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37 of 45 people found the following review helpful By Laura Downing on August 10, 2005
Format: Paperback
I found this book to be offensive on several levels. Other reviewers have mentioned these complaints, but I want people to know that it isn't just a handful of women who found the book repellent.

First off, it seems to support a 1950's mentality. Granted, it talks about working outsite the home, etc., but only if it may cause others to look up to you, supporting your husband's possible promotion. It also talks about advancing your husband's career and how to effectively suck up to his superiors. I could vomit.

Secondly, all of the information can be found elsewhere for free. Some of it is good information, I'll grant Ms. Leyva that, but there was nothing that really impressed me so much to think that this this book was worth the money that was paid for it.

Luckily, it was given to me as a gift. I've been known to re-gift from time to time, but I wouldn't even pass this one on! I value my friendships too much.

Also, as mentioned in other reviews, the book REALLY pushes its website, leading me to believe by the end of the book that it was nothing more than a giant write-up for the website. I visited the site, as the book suggested (over and over and over), and I was absolutely appalled by what I saw! I certainly will not be returning. I felt like I was in High School all over again--18 year old girls grouped off into the cool and not-cool, only on the site it's "the pregnant vs. the not", "the Navy vs. the others", etc. And it seems that some girls (very young and barely H.S. educated) go there really looking for guidance with serious military family issues and what they get instead is "cyberhugs" and "don't worry"'s. But that was not the worst of it.
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30 of 36 people found the following review helpful By Tethys VINE VOICE on August 11, 2005
Format: Paperback
Okay, so I admit I have met military wives who believe the only reason to think about a career is so that you can support your husband's career. But I have also met women who are compassionate, articulate, intelligent women, whose husbands are in the military. This book does a horrible job supporting or even suggesting the opportunity that women who marry men in the military have the option to choose their own developmental path.

Offensive, does not begin to describe my feelings about this book. Ladies, if you are considering marrying someone who is in the military, do yourself a BIG favor and look up women who are living the lifestyle and ask them about it. Think objectively about the decision. Find people who will support YOUR goals and YOUR dreams. There are going to be people you encounter who will spout the drivel from this book like gospel truth and you need to be able to have your own sense of idenitity.

It is hard to have your own sense of self in a military organization, especially when things are often geared toward the moral and welfare of your spouse and not you. Therefore, you must become equipped with your own ideals, goals and dreams, and the strength to follow your heart even when no one will be there cheering for you. Stay away from drivel like this and invest in yourself. YOu can ask your spouse, ombudsman, and other wives for the essential info...like how to get power of attorney...and leave the rest of the "you must be this way" at the door.

That's just how I feel about it.
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