Customer Reviews

Married To Mommy?: A Survival Guide for Married Guys

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

I brought this book with me last week (July 20, 2005) to read during my free time while acting as a responsible adult at boy scout camp. Ohmygod. While well-written and funny (at times), it put a knot in my stomach. I started bumming out. I mean, they hit it on the head on almost every point.

To me, this wasn't funny, it was horrifying. If I were single and saw this happening to my friends, perhaps I'd have seen more humor in it, but after 14 years of marriage, this did nothing but remind me of my situation.

As I sat with the scouts, whittling, belching, and generally being guys, it only hurt more. If that's not enough, on Friday, it was "family night" and in marched the mommies. My wife was instantly trying to clean out our son's tent. I stopped her. Another kid made some comment about it not being as great as he thought it would be, and one of the other mommies was psychoanalyzing him on the spot. I stopped her, too.

I'm seriously considering signing up for another week of scout camp, and I'm going to use "Married to Mommy" as tinder for my campfire.

(heavy sigh)

"Married To Mommy" is truly a unique and highly humorous, though chauvinistic look at the average American marriage. The book is highly insightful and serious, yet still hilarious. Bakeman and Krinbring premise their book on what I would like to consider the "Bakeman-Krinbring Axiom." That is the following: "MEN LOVE WOMEN MORE THAN WOMEN LOVE MEN."

To some this seems self-evident, but to some, this concept is at the very least foreign if not anathema. But B & K go on to explain that the things they discuss in their book are really the results of people interacting in society in accordance with their genetic programming.

This observation is highly savvy and astute, as it brings together concepts of psychology, sociology, genetics, evolution and marital therapy. If as Darwin believed in the "Origin of Species" that in essence, men are genetically wired to have as many offspring as possible with as many women as possible; and women are genetically wired to be selective in who they mate with, then the result is the situation which leaves women looking for what they need for them and their progeny, with men looking mostly just to increase total progeny.

While B & K's incisive observations and suggestions are surely things that will improve marital harmony, they do remind us, that women always WIN! However, B & K effectively say to women in this book, 'we know you know all this stuff already, but now you know men know it too.' The book is truly a very vast generalization of American Marriage, but in addition, it is so universal that virtually every married person will recognize and laugh at some of the things they say in their book.

However, this review would not be complete without the caveat to men, that this book should not be shared with one's wife. There is almost no way to defend what you know in this book to be true, without getting into a flaming argument with your wife. So, the idea is, read the book, learn from it, and use it to increase your overall marital harmony, without revealing you had a little help along the way.

I think, dispite the humor, that these authors are addreessing a real issue: what happened to the party girl I married? She used to dance 'till the place shut down. Now she is doesn't even like the music.

Having read the book. I have a much better understanding of how to deal with it. I now know she's doing what she was programmed to do.

When I first saw the title to this book I was a bit skeptical. I thought it would be about bashing married women with children but was delightfully mistaken.

This book is about everything I have worked very hard to make sure I did not become, a woman who gives up here fun,spirited sexual nature that our husbands fell in love with. I have watched too many of my married friends change drastically once they got married. They cut their hair, stop wearing sexy clothes and act as if sex is a chore.

This book helps those women who are slipping into that Mommy character hopefully stop before it is too late. This is all done in a humerous nature, but can be very useful if taken with some seriousness. This book should be required reading to all couples prior to the "I Do's". I know the divorce rate would drop significantly.

Great job guy's!!!!!! I am one woman who thinks you are right on the mark!

This book keeps you laughing from page one all the way through. What's better, it's "dead on" true! Things I've always wondered about concerning men and women are now crystal clear. A must read for all married, or soon to be married men. As well, an invaluable resource for women who want to know what men are thinking and why. Perfect for all.

This book had both my wife and I laughing (and learning) all the way through. This book brings many serious topics out in the open for discussion in a humorous and light-hearted manner. I recommend it to married and soon to be married couples as a good read and a life long, truly funny reference guide.

Thanks! When's the sequel coming?

This book hits a nerve and the funny bone at the same time! I've never laughed so loud! These guys have almost too much fun with an otherwise dark and scary topic - the "Nuptial Netherworld"! Every friend I've recommended it to can't thank me enough. Everyone - man or woman - should get this book and then personally thank the "Professors"!!!

Really, if you're having trouble in your marriage, this book probably won't help things much. According to the authors, it's perfectly okay for all married men to be a bunch of chauvinistic alcoholics who love to spend a lot of their free time "out with the guys" and shirk off as much reponsibilty as possible. "Men" who appear to have never truly grown into mature adults, who don't seem to make their wives or their marriage much of a priority. Well, I like to drink once in awhile but don't like to go out much, and also find that women can be just as cool to hang around with as men, so it doesn't seem I fit into the authors' perception of what a normal guy is. Yeah, the book's good for a few laughs, and explains all kinds of ways to lie to your wife, pretty much making her into one big dupe as you go constantly out-scheme and out-maneuver her. But this is the real world, guys. A lot of the thought and "advice" in this book are really just downright ridiculous. It's hard to believe that any intelligent man would be expected to take this stuff seriously; it feels more like a book you'd find in the humor section. It just doesn't get to the core(s) of the problem, and some of the ideas look like they could even do more harm than good in the long run. In my situation, I learned my wife was acting like a "mommy" because of self esteem issues. I learned that I had to stop thinking of myself so much and give her the attention she deserves by listening (really listening) to her more and complimenting her more and speaking calmly and rationally when tempted to fight with her. Oh, I'm "whipped" you say? No, but we're both a lot happier. She has more confidence in herself and she's doesn't feel the need to act so much like a "mommy" anymore. But your situation might be different, like you, the husband, may be the one needing more self-confidence. Go read the downloadable book by Katie Zaltman if you need help in your marriage or even if you're about to get married. She very quickly gets to the point, doesn't pull any punches, plus she's funny as hell. Very easy to follow and utilize. I noticed a positive and dramatic change in my marriage after reading just the first ten pages (out of 150)! Reading "Married to Mommy?" did not help at all. It only sympathizes with your situation and can be pretty funny, but it doesn't help you change for the better. Also, at the end of "Married to Mommy?" it says that neither of the authors happens to be married to a "mommy." What!!? Yeah, I don't get it either.

Great short humorous book about the changes relationships go through after marriage. Highly recommended for soon to be married men -and women!

I would have laughed reading this book if it wasn't so true. They went to great lengths identifying everything a guy contemplating marriage needs to know. In fact, this book should be required reading BEFORE tying the knot. However, the advice for dealing with marriage is seriously lacking. I expected to find advice to tell me how to change a relationship that's sucking the life out of me into one that's fulfilling, but instead got the equivalent of "there's nothing you can do to change it, so learn to cope the best you can." Entertaining, but disappointing.