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Marry Me!: Three Professional Men Reveal How to Get Mr. Right to Pop the Question Hardcover – September 19, 2000

22 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

The lawyer, accountant and doctor, respectively, who penned the 1998 dating guide What Men Want are back with another irresistible title, ready to one-up The Rules once again. Now that two out of three of them have embarked on long-term relationships (one is married and one engaged, while the other is still looking for "Ms. Right"), their thoughts have turned to the specific attributes and behaviors of the women who made two of them consider giving up sex with others. Contending that "most men are addicted to conquering many women" (and presuming that these guys are great catches and that women are dying to marry them), they propose to share the privileged information that women need in order for potential husbands to categorize them as "marriage material" rather than "good for now girls." Encouraging women readers to "think of us as your best guy friends," Gerstman, Pizzo and Seldes offer some vintage 1950s advice: don't push "the relationship talk"; don't propose to him; let him pay for everything in public; and "if it were ever a question of making a sacrifice when it came to work, [let him know] you would be happy to let a career opportunity go to benefit his professional standing." Their advice can also be condescending (women just don't know how hard men work and how important their careers are to them) and even insulting (a chart illustrating the exact number of lovers it is permissible for a woman to have had at various ages), but these three mediagenic guys have proven appeal and an act that's well-groomed for the morning shows. (Oct.)
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.
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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Harper Collins; First Edition edition (September 19, 2000)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0060195398
  • ISBN-13: 978-0060195397
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.9 x 8.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 15.2 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 2.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (22 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,878,482 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

21 of 22 people found the following review helpful By GoldenGateGirl on December 30, 2004
Format: Hardcover
I read parts of this book and I skimmed through the remaining chapters. I found this book to be horse manure. This book shows the dark side of men yuppies or not. Because these men have money, they automatically have the license to act like spoiled brats. The double standards listed on this how to book are revolting and show that feminist movement has done little to change many men. They just play the game differently and turn the tables on women by avoiding responsibility to women and giving themselves the freedom to have convenient sex without anybody saying a word.

The book also says that if a guy loses his temper on you for nagging him or anything else you did, it's your fault. Remember that is how verbal and physical abuse starts. All abusers say 'she asked for it' and then get flowers for the woman the next day, in the same way these authors describe in the book.

I could go on and on about all of the unhealthy patterns in relationships they are promoting in this 255 pages of toilet paper. I want to ask this question: If a woman can't stand up to her man and be his equal, how is she going to relate to her father, brother and other male relatives? Then you must also take into consideration the babies that come from this dysfunctional union.

I am also offended at how the book tells women to cohabitate with a man for his convenience. Ladies I'll spare you the heartache and tell you from what I've seen in life: if a man lives with you before getting married, there is a good chance he'll never marry you. You'll only wind up feeling like a used pretend wife. If you desire to cohabitate, do so because it is in your best interest if you want to avoid feeling this way. And this is coming from a regular person.
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20 of 21 people found the following review helpful By a female college student on December 14, 2000
Format: Hardcover
This is a terrible book! At first while I was reading it, I was learning so much, thinking to myself well this is good to know. But then I realized this book does not take into account a woman's own happiness. It teaches women to change their behaviors in order to keep their men happy in hopes they will commit. They blatantly admit men have the upper hand in a relationship. Well, that doesn't sound like a relationship to me. This book will not help you create a healthy, mutually respectful relationship that grows into a commitment. If you want to learn more about men and how to find the Right man, I suggest reading Barbara DeAngelis' Secrets About Men Every Woman Should Know.
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22 of 24 people found the following review helpful By Alexandra on February 6, 2001
Format: Hardcover
I perused this book thinking that it might give me some useful insights. As an MD, I seem to meet only professional men and am always intrigued by the commitment-phobic natures many of them display. Don't expect this book to give you any balanced perspective -- the three authors display a combination of immaturity and arrogance that's truly dismaying. The section on how to calculate the maximum number of men it's "acceptable" to have slept with based on your age would be funny if it weren't so insulting. Double standards abound in this worthless tome. The only conclusion that I've been able to draw is that if a man is, say, a lawyer, doctor, or accountant (just to pick three professions randomly...), then the usual standards of humanity, respect, and tenderness simply do not apply. If you're a woman looking to reel in a high-income earner with a few letters trailing after his name and don't mind subjugating yourself to his self-importance, then this is the book for you.
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17 of 18 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on June 19, 2002
Format: Hardcover
I perused this book recently, and I have to agree with most of the other reviewers here. To quote Lisa Simpson, "I can't believe they expect us to swallow that tripe!" First of all, the book is full of contradictions. The authors tell the reader that she shouldn't expect her relationship to follow any kind of time table, and to let it proceed at its natural pace, but a few pages later mention that if you aren't married to your man within five years of your first date you *must* leave him, because he obviously isn't interested. This book is full of similar "orders" to the reader (based on his reaction to the mention of marriage, you may be ordered by the authors to leave your man.). Also, the writers' assurance that a man's career will always come first and is the sole reason for his existence is a bunch of baloney (as is the suggestion that a man will only be faithful if you remove "distractions" from his life; or, he doesn't ever go out to anywhere where there will be attractive single ladies again, since they will obviously lure him away from you.) Ladies, there are men--successful, wonderful, caring men--out there who realize that money is not everything in life. I know this because I've been dating one for the past seven months.
As for the authors, 1) their perspective is relatively narrow despite the "range" of careers they have since it comes out of New York City. Enough said. 2) I feel sorry for Brad and Rich's wives. The book treats them like they were prizes to be won, and the authors were successful! Yessssssss! 3) Is it any wonder that Chris is still single?
If you think this book is a load of ..., then you ought to read the title story in "The Girls' Guide to Hunting and Fishing" by Melissa Bank, which parodies this kind of junk.
Happy fishing.
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