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Marry Smart: Advice for Finding THE ONE Hardcover – March 11, 2014

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Editorial Reviews

Review

 “Every smart young woman should seriously consider Susan Patton’s commonsense advice. Sure, it’s controversial—but only because it’s so vital.” (--James Taranto, The Wall Street Journal)

"Like a trip to the carwash, where the dust of antagonistic feminist doctrine about sex and marriage gets blasted off the windshield so they can see clearly." (--Charlotte Allen, The Wall Street Journal)

About the Author

Susan Patton is a first-generation American and was in one of the first classes of women to graduate from Princeton in 1977. She is a first-time author, a human resources consultant, and an executive coach in New York City. She is the proud mother of two Princeton sons, a daughter-in-law who also graduated from Princeton, and a long-haired red dachshund named Lucille.
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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Gallery Books; First Edition edition (March 11, 2014)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1476759707
  • ISBN-13: 978-1476759708
  • Product Dimensions: 6 x 0.9 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 14.1 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 2.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (71 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #677,831 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

69 of 83 people found the following review helpful By P. Geisik on June 5, 2014
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
The first thing that hit me, upon reading the first few pages of this book, was that I had paid for it. I had paid for this massive brain fart of a book. You will never hate anything as hard as I hate this book. And it's not even in the top 10 things I hate. Not by a long shot. Likewise, you will never hate anything quite as much as Susan Patton hates logic. That is the only conclusion I can draw from her complete disregard for it. She contradicts herself many times in this book, some times in the same chapter. I must admit, I did get a laugh out of it. The way she talks about women in their 30's is funny in a horrible kind of way. At one point Ms. Patton instructs women in their 30's who have the audacity to attend parties to leave by sharing a cab with "the other spinsters in training." Ms. Patton appears to be completely out of touch with modern life. At one point in the book she expresses that she believes anybody can join a marching band if they can enthusiastically bang trash can lids together. As a college student at one of America's less than prestigious schools, I can safely say standards are higher than that, at least at my school. Patton admits that she did no research beyond talking to those within her narrow circle of friends, and it shows. She believes herself to be incredibly smart, and looks down on anybody who did not go to an Ivy League school as dumb. She considers a degree from Princeton (Her alma mater, which she reminds us with alarming frequency) to be more important than from any other school, regardless of what a student majored in. Her exact example was, from page 68, was "A degree in advanced biomedical engineering and experimental physics from Podunk University can't compare to an A.B. in English from Yale.Read more ›
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121 of 150 people found the following review helpful By Dovie Zola on March 28, 2014
Format: Hardcover
As a 27-year old woman, I wish I had found this book sooner. Here I was, pursuing a career (like we do, amirite ladies?), thinking that I had something more to offer the world-- boy was I wrong! While I was submitting applications for graduate schools, my genitals were literally rusting shut, my face and breasts were in free fall, and what was once a youthful twinkle in my eye became but a gaping chasm of piteous desperation. What man would have me now?

I guess I better throw in the towel and start collecting cats now. At least when I die alone, they will be there to consume my fetid corpse, saving anyone who might have found my remains from the horror of having to look at my dilapidated husk.
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40 of 49 people found the following review helpful By Lindsay Brown on March 18, 2014
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
I purchased this book looking for some pointers on how to know myself better during the dating process.

I'm nearly 30 and seemingly unlucky in love. I blinked and my 20's are gone and yet I feel far from my goal of marriage and children. However, looking back, I didn't have much of a strategy for my romantic life. Knowing how to date, who to date, what I do and do not want.

I agree with Patton's advice that women should establish early on what they truly want for the future of their relationships, just as they may for their careers, their education, their livelihood.
Personally I did not take that advice as anti-feminist, as other readers may have. I took it as a nudge to be conscientious and aware and to not let time pass you by.
If I had read this book seven years ago I would have taken my head out of the clouds for a moment and made a personal note- don't forget to find that special someone!

HOWEVER, I did not care for the condescending tone of some passages.
Patton seems only to be speaking to the "elite" Ivy Leage set.

"Where do you think you will find super-smart men once you are no longer a student? At a bar? Online? Once you enter the real world, you'll be stunned by how smart the men are . . . not."

"A man who is significantly below your intellectual level, you will eventually get stupid juice all over you."

So I'm screwed if I didn't go to a top school?
Men that didn't go to a top school are not smart??
Men who subscribe to online dating sites are "stupid"?
Bars are off limits?

How awful and how did these sentences make it past editing?

BOTTOM LINE: This book only made me feel MORE worried about dating and MORE fretful that I'm up against my biological clock. "Part III, Your 30's" gave me anxiety and made me feel insecure for being single approaching 30.
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
I'm pretty sure that is you were to take a poll of all marriages that those that met in college would be a small fraction of the whole. Especially considering that 50% of all marriages begin online.

Tried to give her a shot, to hear a different perspective. Got 47% through the book and requested a refund. I have never requested a refund for a book!

Save your time, your brain cells, and money.

Instead make a list of things that you enjoy doing, or would like to do that are social and look for clubs, community events, and organizations where you can do those things. Get yourself out there. Meeting someone is all about the numbers. The more interactions you have with others (especially new people) the more likely you are going to meet someone. 1 + 1 = 2
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32 of 41 people found the following review helpful By american bandersnatch on March 17, 2014
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
I don't read advice books but I thought I would read this one after sitting next to Susan at a dinner last year. The advice is generally sensible although old fashioned and it could have been an enjoyable book. However, she comes across as snobbish (Princeton is soooo wonderful, Manhattan is the only place to live, her kids are so marvelous), self satisfied and judgmental. She repeats her advice again and again until it becomes painful. Just read her original letter online and save the cost of buying the book.
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