Mastering Your Moods: How To Recognize Your Emotional Style and Make it Work For You--Without Drugs [Paperback]

Melvyn Kinder (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: January 1, 1995

Drawing on recent research indicating that everyone is born with an innate, biologically driven emotional temperament, the author identifies temperament types and behavioral patterns and provides techniques to help overcome anxiety, anger, and depression. Reprint. 20,000 first printing.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Millions of Americans mistakenly believe they are neurotic or have "personality disorders," argues the author of this commonsense guide. As a result, many spend years in therapy, analyzing their present and past circumstances, yet never find resolutions. The difficulty, according to Kinder ( Smart Women, Foolish Choices ), is that what they perceive as problems usually are not. Instead, most "neuroses" are manifestations of one of four personality styles: the Sensor (sensitive, introverted); the Focuser (introverted, prone to depression and worry); the Discharger (extroverted, emotionally expressive); or the Seeker (sensation-seeking, extroverted). These temperaments, claims Kinder, are biochemically based; attempting to change or hide one's temperament, then, creates undue stress. The solution is to work with one's personality ("setting your emotional thermostat"), enhancing its positive attributes and finding constructive ways to express (not deny or hide) the negative. The Focuser, for example, becomes vexed when idle, due to a high-arousal threshold; instead of "thought stopping" or dredging up the past to find a "root," Focusers should acknowledge their feelings, then find an activity to "focus" on other than their own thoughts.
Copyright 1993 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Kirkus Reviews

Slickly packaged pop psych from Kinder, who's previously tackled myths about self-improvement (Going Nowhere Fast, 1990) and marriage (Husbands and Wives, 1989). Here, the L.A. psychologist turns to myths about emotional health. Exposing common misconceptions about emotions--e.g., that we can and should control them--clears the way for a new understanding of why we feel the way we do, says Kinder, who contends that temperament is inborn. But although he mentions research into how genes determine behavior, the author gives science short shrift here, contriving a system that lends itself to a diagrammatic presentation as neat as a model of an earth- centered universe (and perhaps requiring an equal act of faith to accept). In Kinder's model, temperament has two determinants- -``arousal level,'' or emotionality; and ``action tendency,'' which can be expressed as extroversion or introversion. By putting these determinants on separate axes, the author derives four basic types--``Sensors,'' ``Focusers,'' ``Dischargers,'' and ``Seekers''--which, he says, correspond to the four primary emotional predispositions of anxiety, sadness, anger, and craving. Kinder devotes a chapter to each temperament type, and readers are encouraged to determine their own types by means of quizzes at the end of each chapter. The next step is learning how to work with one's type, which in Kinder's lingo becomes ``expanding your emotional comfort zone'' and ``resetting your emotional thermostat.'' To do this, he provides advice along the lines of ``don't stifle your anger'' and ``become aware of your body.'' A soothing, clearly presented message of self-acceptance that may succeed in adding four new terms to the vocabulary of psychobabble. (First serial to Redbook) -- Copyright ©1993, Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Product Details

• Paperback: 288 pages
• Publisher: Touchstone; 1st Fireside ed edition (January 1, 1995)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0671505637
• ISBN-13: 978-0671505639
• Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.5 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 9 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #973,961 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

12 of 12 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars This book is the ultimate answer when nothing else works., March 5, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: Mastering Your Moods: How To Recognize Your Emotional Style and Make it Work For You--Without Drugs (Paperback)

Dr. Kinder has turned physcotherapy into the study of physcobiology. After years of therapy and trying to fit into a "mold" that wasn't working, I accidentally found this book. What a relief to know that there are some things that are not "broken" and are not the result of a supposedly dysfunctional childhood. Dr. Kinder focuses his years of therapy into the logical response that due to our biochemical makeup, there are somethings about us that cannot be changed. The greatest part of this book is that he tells us "You are not broken", and then gives exercises that teach how to function with the moods that are part of our genetic makeup.

Although rather technical, this book as more merit than anything I have read in the many years of searching for the reasons of why I am the way I am.

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars This book helps you put a lifetime of emotions into perspect, August 22, 1998

By A Customer

This review is from: Mastering Your Moods: How To Recognize Your Emotional Style and Make it Work For You--Without Drugs (Paperback)

Before reading this book I was confused, anxious and on the verge of another failed marraige. Mastering Your Moods has helped me understand why I feel the way I do and why I react the way I do.

I owe a sincere debt of gratitude to Dr. Kinder for guiding me through many of my innermost fears and anxieties. By understanding and working within myself, I can once again feel alive.

The book has also helped me better understand why others act in certain ways, particularly my spouse, for whom I have the greatest admiration and love.

I strongly recommend this book for anyone who is looking to better understand themselves and those with whom they interact.

6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Don't fix what ain't broken, September 8, 2002

By A Customer

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Mastering Your Moods: How To Recognize Your Emotional Style and Make it Work For You--Without Drugs (Paperback)

If only I had read this book when it first had been published,
I would have saved myself years of grief trying to come to terms
with who I am!

Take it from me .. somebody who has done the route of analysis, medication and spiritual quests ... to find a way to peace/happiness - learning how to accept and deal with reality as it IS ... and to take control of the NOW is the way to go.

I happened upon this book in the Library - and read it within a few days! It confirmed my belief ... that the concept of a generalized "normality" is a myth. And that we as Americans, far too often over-medicate and over-therapy-ize ourselves due to our inablity to accept our essential selves. Just reading Chapter 2 alone - "Exploding Myths about Emotions" ... was incredibly liberating! But most importantly, this book gives one tools to accept and manage one's self emotionally without crippling one's emotional self-confidence with judgemental psycho-babble labeling.

While I don't agree that all people fit conveniently into 4 categories ... since I, myself scored high on all the tests, so I could be any one of the types at one point or another... I found the suggestions of how to manage certain problematic moods/ways of being invaluable. They really DO work!

This is the first review I was inspired to write about a self-help book, and I have read hundreds of them over the years!