Customer Reviews

For Matrimonial Purposes

5 star:		(14)
4 star:		(17)
3 star:		(13)
2 star:		(6)
1 star:		(11)

 

 

Two of my favorite types of literature are Indian and Chick-lit so when I read the back cover of this book I was ecstatic. I had a lot of expectations when I started reading "For Matrimonial Purposes," but after reading it..to say I was disappointed is an understatement! Kavita Daswani's book hailed as 'Bridget Jones meets Bollywood' is the story of single-gal Anju's search for true love.

The writer's biggest failure was when creating the main character. Personally she annoyed me tremendously. On one hand she was too wannabe-Sex and the City..dropping designer names every now and then. And on the other hand she has acts as an obidient Indian daughter willing to get married to any Tom, Dick or Harry her parents choose for her. This to me was not believable at all. I understand Ms. Daswani's approach to make her identifiable to people Indian and not, but I did not buy it...any of it. She made claims of being independent and self-sufficient when the whole time she was hopelessly dependent on a man to complete her and give meaning to her existence. She claimed to be looking for true love when she didn't mind being tied to any random man willing to take her.

I love Sex and the City and Bridget Jones, they are about accepting who you are and loving yourself. They say that being 30-something and single is totally okay. But For Matrimonial Purposes is saying that if you are reaching 30..please run, hurry up..quickly look for a man who will have you or else it would be shameful to be alone. On the other hand I understand the need to make your parents proud and be considerate of their dreams and desires for you. But Ms. Daswani fails miserably to create the right balance.

Another thing that I did not fall for her is how Anju goes from not having a degree in PR to becoming a VP of a company who does PR for high fashion of all things. Here again Ms. Daswani tries to create a Sex and the City-type character with a glamorous PR life...but she could have gone for a more believable career. The book also ends badly, the romance seems rushed and Ms. Daswani is trying to hard to end it in a fairy tale-type ending instead of a realistic one.

The book is WAY TOO FAR away from reality to be enjoyable. I hated the book.

I'm an avid reader of almost any type of fiction (a really wide range, believe me). Lately, I've been into fiction revolving Indian/South Asian culture. Alas, this book takes the subject of arranged marriage and sort of mangles it. The protagonist is considered an "old maid" for still not being married at the age of 33. But this entire story is all about her search for "the one" to marry (as arranged by her parents, relatives, whatnot). She even moves to New York not because she wants to better herself, she moves there to a) try to find a husband; and b) escapes people's criticisms of her. She find a great new life there, but no, she's still whining about not having a husband.

The book goes back and forth into time but it's all about the same thing. "Why can't I find a husband?" Well you know why? Because the protagonist is a whiny, self-pitying, spoiled lady! I recommend you borrow this book! Don't buy it!

To sum it up, this book is another example of a lost opportunity to realize the potential of an interesting theme, namely the juxtaposition of two cultures and its effect on one individual. The writing is simplistic and cliche-ridden, and the number of references to pop culture will give the book the shelf life of a BenLo movie. Superficial and manufactured, this one will take little time to read and even less time to forget.

Anju, the narrator, describes her New York life as shallow, and she stole the words right out of my mouth.

I picked up Daswani's book because I really enjoy East-West novels. Although the book was very entertaining, and filled in my spare time at work for a couple days, it is not the type of book that leaves a truly lasting impression. The book presents an interesting problem -- a young, somewhat Americanized Indian girl trying to decide whether or not the traditional arranged marriage will work for her. This much is good, but Daswani's execution leaves much to be desired.

My main problem with this book is that I did not identify with the narrator. Particularly in Part One, she comes across as being spoiled and pretentious. Daswani drops brand names like loose change through the whole novel, turning Anju into the upper-crust type that is far out of my league. I don't think I could even be friends with someone this brand-conscious. Surprisingly (as a non-Indian) I identified more with her family and their values. I simply could not feel sorry for Anju, who was apparently having the time of her life in New York, and judges men with the same critical and shallow eye that she directs at the latest designer handbags. The air of superiority that she adopts with her well-meaning family is also very annoying. Up until the last few pages -- ESPECIALLY in the last few pages -- I lost interest in the ultimate outcome of the book. Anju really didn't need a man.

I also found it fishy that a young Indian woman could land in America, wet behind the ears, and instantly walk into this posh lifestyle full of privilege and celebrity encounters. As a young immigrant, there are never major culture clashes (save the one with Jeff) so one can assume that she immediately assimilated and began to climb the career ladder. For all this book does to highlight the culture differences between India and America, Anju has a suspiciously easy adjustment and I was surprised that Daswani did not explore more facets of this transition, such as the value of virginity before marriage, religious clashes, or parental restraint. For all practical purposes, Anju's Indian-ness disappears when she gets to the U.S., which gives the reader the impression that she is very shallow and fickle -- not the type of person we want to see getting married.

The plot is also eerily similar to the author's bio on the back flap. While this alone does not make the book good or bad, it seems that Daswani is trying to capitalize on the glitz and glamour of her own lifestyle and thus the book is tainted with a hint of vanity. Daswani is not your "average girl," nor is her narrator.

The value of this book is purely in its entertainment element. It is often amusing and provides a little enlightenment on the situation of young Indian women facing arranged marriages. However, if you want to see this issue explored in a more provacative, complex manner, I recommend Monica Ali's Brick Lane instead of/in addition to this book.

Anju is an upper-middle-class Indian girl, who has grown up in Bombay. In her world arranged marriages are the norm, and girls are commonly married in their early to mid 20s. When we meet Anju she is aged 33, living in New York and still single - much to her and her family's shame, and definitely not from lack of trying.

The book then goes back in time to tell the story of her family's efforts to marry her off. At times amusing, at others more serious, the book gives great insight into an aspect of Indian culture that many find intriguing or hard to understand. Anju is a likeable character and you find yourself rooting for her and hoping that a suitable partner will be found.

Unfortunately the flashback technique removes most of the suspense from the story, as it is only in the final 15 pages that we finally pick up where the book began. For this reason, I found that my interest began to pall as I read the book. You can only read about so many potential suitors who don't work out for whatever reason, and you tire of Anju's ongoing cycle of hope/disappointment/despair. When it finally comes, the ending feels too rushed after the lengthy build-up.

While Kavita Daswani writes with insight about Indian culture, her portrayal of the New York fashion world where Anju ends up working feels superficial and unconvincing, and most of the characters in the book are stereo-typical.

Overall, I found this book just okay. I enjoyed learning more about India and for this reason I liked the first half a lot more than the second. But I felt it lost momentum as it went on and in the end, I was relieved to let it go.

I enjoyed reading this, but would categorize it as fluffy. As an avid reader of South Asian fiction, I was glad to find it and found it entertaining. However, I was somewhat put off by Anju's narrow outlook. She seems to take her money and the accoutrements that come with it for granted. While she's grown up with servants, I would have expected that living in America would have changed her habit of treating them as if their sole purpose is to cook and clean, etc. for her. I found this attitude of entitlement frustrating, and to me it created a one-dimensional character. The book felt like a soap opera, and while it was worth reading for an hour or two, if you want more reality and depth, I would recommend Divakaruni or Malladi.

I picked up this book from my local library thinking it would be a fun read about arranged marriage. I was appalled by Kavita Daswani's description of modern Indian parents and their expectations of their children. What particularly put me off was Anju's mother saying to her "I don't want you to be happy, I want you to be married"! Her description of how her circle of friends and family look down upon her because she has a job is absolutely unrealistic. That does not happen, especially in a city like Bombay! I think the author would be really surprised to know that countless marriages are arranged based on the kind of job the woman holds (the more degrees and salary she has, the better)! I'm sure not many women in India will be able to associate with a character like Anju's; who just sits at home doing nothing but waiting for her parents to hook her up with the right guy.

The only aspects of the book that were real and humorous were the descriptions of Anju's meetings with potential-husbands.

Anju's life in New York and her work in fashion are so dull and predictive (with the token gay best friend thrown in). Somebody should also tell her that for most Indian parents, to have a child work and live in the US; is a matter of pride (and a definite USP for arranging a marriage) and not something to be ashamed of.

I would hate for people to form an opinion about India and Indian society based on this book.

I like to torment myself by reading chick-lit. Every time I swear I'll never pick up another one somebody recommends a book they swear actually lives up to the hype and I'll devote a few hours to that rather than, say, The Iliad. I wouldn't mind if the books actually wound up being good but I am so sick of the constant repetition of 'sassy, shallow heroine in the big city looks for love while furthering her journalism career' (Why do all single girls in books work for magazines or newspapers? Are minimum wage girls not worthy of love or just not interesting enough to write a book about?) and this book made for a nice, only slightly different change. Because it's set around Indian culture, the fact that someone's life can be made so miserable by virtue of not having a man makes complete sense for once.

Highly readable and only nominally insulting, it revolves almost entirely around not meeting up with the expectations of society and all the emptiness that comes from not fitting in, even when you're not sure if it's what you really want to do or not. Anju's struggle to choose between accepting her place in a man-centric culture or to continue to hold out for something better actually made me very sympathetic towards her, not an easy feat with these novels. She does tend to see-saw from one extreme (running off to New York) to the other (ditching her career for a month so her mother can find her a man) which left me wondering if her problems weren't something a little counseling and some strong anti-depressants couldn't fix.

Just as things start to look up and you you think Anju has finally found herself the author decides it's more important this book sells rather than makes sense and so shoehorns in a last minute 'happy ever after' to appeal to the lowest commmon denominator. The problem is it's blatantly tacked on and all the internal issues you think Anju has dealt with for good all come back and make her look weak and stupid. The guy she hooks up with treats her the same way her parents do and she reacts accordingly (ditches her new life to start all over again just to land a husband); she overcomes one stifling, controlling relationship only to trade it in for another. But apparently that's okay, because she gets a beautiful wedding out of the deal. The whole story of sorting herself out is ditched in order to make the man, the parents, and presumably the typical chick lit audience happy. It rings completely false and only serves to make you annoyed at being so obviously pandered to.

Overall this was a read-it-while-you're-at-the-gym novel. It's more like watching a mindless sitcom than reading a book. The story was painfully cliched, both in terms of the Indianisms and Americanisms. Fashion industry in New York? Puhleaze. Visiting a swami in Bombay? Whatever. As an Indian, I found it rather alienating reading about an Indian lifestyle I have never personally encountered. As an American, I felt much the same.
There are a few amusing scenes in the book, but not enough to make it a "must read" as other reviewers have recommended. If you're bored and have nothing better to do, pick up this novel. Just don't expect to be wowed.

I read For Matrimonial Purposes just after struggling through something similar (Madras on Rainy Days by Samina Ali, which I didn't care for) and found this one to be much better, though not great. The Village Bride of Bevery Hills by Kavita Daswani was much more fun.

The entire book is more or less about the search for a suitable marriage partner. Period. The main character's life in New York seemed forced--a girl who was too afraid to speak to people is suddenly writing press releases for a top fashion PR firm? It didn't add to the story, and in fact made whatever cultural conflict Anju faced with her quest for a husband seem trivial and silly. At 33, as an employed, independent, travelling woman, she seems a bit too old to be so concerned with wanting to please Mummy and Daddy by finding a proper "boy."

That said, this isn't a bad book, and it is worth a read. Didn't love it, didn't hate it, and glad I read it. The Indian traditions/culture is interesting, and I wonder how close to reality it is?