May the Circle Be Unbroken: An Intimate Journey Into the Heart of Adoption [Hardcover]

Lynn C. Franklin (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: October 27, 1998

May the Circle Be Unbroken is both a poignant memoir of a woman who reunited with a child she gave up for adoption and a no-nonsense book that gives readers an intelligent and well-informed approach to adoption. The two are woven seamlessly into a complex and engaging story that is, in fact, many stories from many people that form a complete picture of the varied and often fulfilling experience of adoption.

In the 1960s, when she was an unmarried college sophomore, Lynn Franklin surrendered her newborn son for adoption. Using her own story as a point of departure, Franklin examines the changing face of adoption and explores the uncertainties and emotions that surround it with rare honesty and perception.

Moving and enlightened, May the Circle Be Unbroken will prove invaluable for readers concerned with the practical, emotional, and legal aspects of adoption, whether they are thinking of making an adoption plan for their child or hoping to be chosen as suitable parents for someone else's child. Franklin demystifies adoption and offers essential comfort to those who have felt, firsthand, the impact of adoption on their lives. She has dialogues with children of adoption who discuss the struggle to come to terms with their feelings of loss and abandonment and the difficulty of forging an identity without knowing their biological heritage. She gives equal time to those who became parents through an abundance of human affection rather than by biology, by audition rather than chance.

Franklin covers the changing face of adoption and virtually every possible form of adoption, but, perhaps most important, she speaks to adoptees wondering if they should search for their mothers and to women who have relinquished a child and are wondering if they are emotionally able to reconnect. While her own powerful story anchors the book, it is her voice as a birth mother that will distinguish this book from others on the subject. It will also resonate emotionally for people who have no individual experience of adoption, but who, like any of us, struggle with the universal issues of loss, identity, and personal reconciliation.

Since finding her son, Franklin has come to know his wife and children, who also have become an important part of her life. In so doing, she has closed one of life's most precious circles.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Lynn C. Franklin's memoir of giving a child up for adoption and the relationship she developed with her son later in life examines the complexities of the adoption process--which seems to be lifelong. Franklin, who spoke to her son's father only once after the birth, was a typical unmarried mother of the 1960s. Her son, Andrew, approached her in 1993 and they met a scant month after their first contact. In her book, Franklin uses her feelings about and relationship to Andrew as particular examples in a larger survey of adoption.

While Andrew firmly informed Franklin that he considered his mother to be the woman who raised him, a central point of the book is that adoptive families--like many families in a world where divorce and remarriage are common--are flexible, elastic institutions. Franklin, who is the only birth parent on the board of directors of an adoption agency, values her contact with adoptive parents on the board (as well as with Andrew's father and mother) because it helps all of them understand others' perspectives and break through the barriers of fear and ignorance that can isolate members of the "adoption triad." Franklin uses many excerpts from interviews with and writings by birth parents, adoptees, and adoptive parents. Ably assisted by freelance writer Elizabeth Ferber, she organizes these varied voices into a unified narrative that leads readers through each phase of the adoption process, which evolves over the lifetime of all the participants.

From Publishers Weekly

Franklin's memoir/study, written with the assistance of Ferber (Steven Spielberg), is in keeping with the current emphasis on open adoption, whereby members of the adoption "triad" (birth parents, adoptive parents, adoptees) have contact with one another. In 1966, Franklin, pregnant, unmarried and under pressure from her parents, placed her newborn son, Andrew, with the Spence-Chapin adoption agency. In 1993, mother and son were reunited. Drawing on her own experience as well as on research and extensive interviews, Franklin strongly advocates assisting interested adoptees in searching for their birth parents. Even though reunions are not necessarily happy and the process is emotionally difficult for everyoneAmost often, especially the adoptive parentsAFranklin maintains that meeting one or both birth parents is a crucial step toward easing the adoptee's feelings of abandonment. Franklin's open adoption agenda can sometimes cloud her arguments. She admits that many who go abroad to adopt do so "because they do not want to deal with birth parents," but she counters with an unconvincingly categorical proof: "We know, however, that no matter how distant these birth parents may be, they continue to exist in the hearts and minds of the children." Franklin, a literary agent who now serves on the board of Spence-Chapin, covers a wide gamut of topics, from transracial adoption to the rights of birth fathers to the importance of support groups in helping triad members build cooperative rather than adversarial relationships. Ultimately, this is a helpful guide for readers already convinced of the wisdom of open adoption.
Copyright 1998 Reed Business Information, Inc.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 288 pages
• Publisher: Harmony; 1st edition (October 27, 1998)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0517707551
• ISBN-13: 978-0517707555
• Product Dimensions: 9 x 6.5 x 1.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.3 pounds
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,560,879 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Discover books, learn about writers, read author blogs, and more.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 10 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Heartwarming!, July 18, 2001

By 

Dawn LoBue - See all my reviews

This review is from: May the Circle Be Unbroken: An Intimate Journey Into the Heart of Adoption (Hardcover)

As an adoptee fortunate enough to find her birthparents (and therefore being familiar with all aspects of the triad), I found Lynn C. Franklin's book excellent. I have read many books about adoption, this one outshines them all. It was not overly clinical or statistical and was written with compassion, heart and objectivity. Adoption is such a complex topic, this is not an accomplishment to be taken lightly. Ms. Franklin's candid personal reflections of the search for her son stirred emotions deep within this reader and in my opinion brings greater understanding to everyone who has been touched by adoption or is interested in the subject. She gives voice to birthparents, adoptees and adoptive parents and their struggles with depth and kindness and backs it up with facts and experience. I am grateful to her for her efforts.

9 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A must read for anyone touched by Adoption, January 4, 2000

By 

Clare McCarty (USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: May the Circle Be Unbroken: An Intimate Journey into the Heart of Adoption (Paperback)

Lynn Franklin touches on all sides of the triad in this book. It really gave me some insight into my true feelings on being adopted. My adoptive mother, and birth mother have all read it and loved it.

9 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars a thoughtful, well-rounded discussion of a difficult subject, February 1, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: May the Circle Be Unbroken: An Intimate Journey Into the Heart of Adoption (Hardcover)

As a successfully reunited adoptee who is close to her parents and her birthmother, I find that adoption literature often lacks full perspective. Adoptees, birth parents and adoptive parents are portrayed in many cases as beleaguered heroes/heroines, pathetic victims or manipulative and uncaring villians.

"May the Circle be Unbroken" provides a more realistic view, fully considering what each member of the triad experiences at the time of placement and at the time of search and (possibly) reunion. It presents a clear, mature and sane description of what one might encounter during different stages of the triad's lifetime. The birthmother author presents a fully-realized description of her own agony at relinquishment without slipping into self-pity. She has a strong grasp on the feelings of the adoptee and adoptive parent as well, yet she acknowledges that everyone's experience is different. Theories (such as the "Primal Wound") are presented as conjecture and possibility rather than fact.

The firm grounding provided by this clear-eyed presentation could be extraordinarily useful to help birthmothers to heal, to aid adoptive parents in understanding the challenges they may face and to prepare all three "sides" to cope with the unexpected joys and traumas assoociated with search and reunion. Franklin helps each person touched by adoption by arming them with a full perspective and letting them know that they are not alone.