Mayday!: Asking for Help in Times of Need (BK Life (Paperback)) [Paperback]

M Nora Klaver (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: July 9, 2007 | Series: BK Life (Paperback)

You don't have to do it alone. In this engaging guide to understanding and conquering the personal and professional fears that keep us from turning to others in times of need, coach Nora Klaver offers readers compelling insights on why we don't ask for help, why we should, and how to do it.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

First time author Klaver begins this self-help with a search for archetypes that sets up her refreshing, Jungian take on the emotional potholes that make asking for help a difficult-at times impossible-task. Thoughtful exercises and vignettes guide readers toward an understanding of help as an opportunity "not only to get my needs met but... to be touched by another soul." As such, she looks at what makes asking for help "a universally dreaded endeavor" ("We were never taught how," "We have few models," "We love our independence") and then goes a step further to address the roots of these excuses: fear of surrender, shame and separation. The bulk of the work looks to build confidence in readers by examining each step of the asking process: recognizing the need, getting motivated, formulating the question and going easy on yourself, to name a few. Klaver encourages readers to separate and examine various emotional states, and call on "applied virtues" like self-compassion and faith to transform body, mind and behavior. With lyric, accessible prose, Klaver fleshes out a seemingly narrow topic to provide an unusual angle on human interaction and emotion.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

About the Author

M. Nora Klaver is a master coach with twenty years of experience guiding professionals in Fortune 100 companies. While specializing in leadership and organizational development, Klaver has learned that CEO and office assistant alike share similar aspirations and the same kinds of fears. Therefore, she coaches both businesspeople within corporations and individual clients. After earning her master's degree in corporate education, Klaver began her professional career developing training programs for Arthur Anderson, then a Top Six professional services firm. In 1993 she launched her first business, Azay Consulting, providing organizational development services to multinational firms. In 1996, Ms. Klaver founded Inq Inc., Coaching Through Inquiry, a firm dedicated to assisting individuals (in both corporate and non-corporate environments) to achieve personal and professional fulfillment. Her corporate client groups have since included Leo Burnett, Allstate Financial Services and Allstate Insurance, the Chicago Mercantile Exchange, NCR Corporation, and Philip Morris USA. Klaver is an active member of the nternational Coach Federation (ICF) and the Association for Spirit at Work (ASAW). She is certified as anontological coach through the Newfield Network USA and as a Master Certified Coach through the ICF. Klaver lives in Oak Park, Illinois.

Product Details

• Paperback: 214 pages
• Publisher: Berrett-Koehler Publishers (July 9, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1576754510
• ISBN-13: 978-1576754511
• Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.6 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #440,492 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

7 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Really insightful executive coach - great review from NY Times, July 10, 2007

By 

Karen (Chicago) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Mayday!: Asking for Help in Times of Need (BK Life (Paperback)) (Paperback)

I decided to read this book based on a great review I read in the NY Times and her reputation in Chicago as a top executive coach. The premise of the book is that learning to ask for help is not just good for altruistic reasons; it makes business sense. She has some good examples of how asking for help can work to your advantage in getting ahead at work and getting along with your coworkers. She offers some great tips on how to ask for help too. I know people who have worked with this executive coach and rave about her. After working with her and the techniques she shares in this book, they were promoted very quickly. I'm confident the skills I learned through this book will do the same for me. A+++

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Mayday!: Asking for Help in Times of Need, by M. Nora Klaver, July 30, 2007

By 

- "-" (-) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Mayday!: Asking for Help in Times of Need (BK Life (Paperback)) (Paperback)

I found Nora Klaver's stories and advice on asking for help so inspiring, I'm getting copies for a couple of friends and family members who would also benefit from her wisdom and guidance.

I also find her accompanying workbook a great help in identifying where and how I can open up and connect with others by including them in ways of helping me. Doing this seemed impossible at first, but Ms. Klaver brought out the courage and desire to reach out in asking for and appreciating help, which is making a significant difference for me, and for those I've been asking.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Important material economically expressed, March 9, 2008

By 

Allan G. Hunter (Watertown, MA United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Mayday!: Asking for Help in Times of Need (BK Life (Paperback)) (Paperback)

Picking up M. Nora Klaver's book gave me one of those `ah ha!' moments that I really needed - she addresses the fact that so many of us don't ask for help when we would be far better off if we did. She dares to ask why so many of us behave that way (and I certainly do) and what the ultimate cost of this can be. It's so fundamental it almost takes my breath away that we refuse help so often.

Ms. Klaver's book is brief, but in its delightfully lucid organization it contains a wealth of important material, for the failure to ask for help when we need it isn't just a question of every now and then. It's more like an attitude so many of us have that cuts us off from others, reduces our effectiveness, and locks us into a way of feeling undeserving. This can ultimately make us more helpless than we were before. Fortunately this book gives a clear answer to show us how we can break this pattern. The seven steps in the Mayday process are clearly stated and eye-opening, and the way she writes about applying the virtues of compassion, self-compassion, faith, and gratitude made me see how often the fear of seeming to be in someone else's debt can limit a whole lifetime.

Whether you're in business (where asking for help can be seen as a lack of ability) or starting a new episode in your life, or facing a domestic problem such as caring for children or elders, Mayday will show you a whole new way of handling things. Reading it is like being shown the correct way to do something after years of doing it badly or not at all - suddenly everything makes more sense, and becomes easy.

Allan Hunter

Author: "Stories We Need to Know:Reading Your Life Path in Literature" (Findhorn 2008)

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