Mean Girls, Meaner Women: Understanding Why Women Backstab, Betray, and Trash-Talk Each Other and How to Heal [Paperback]

Dr. Erika Holiday (Author), Dr. Joan Rosenberg (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: June 3, 2009

Why can so many women form wonderfully close connections with each other while some intentionally hurt other women? Why are girls so mean to other girls? What motivates them to betray, backstab, trash-talk, and humiliate one another? Why does this same hurtful behavior continue between women well into adulthood? What can women do to have closer and more authentic connections with one another? Mean Girls, Meaner Women, written by Dr. Erika Holiday and Dr. Joan I. Rosenberg, two well-known psychologists long involved in women's issues, provide answers about this baffling behavior. They take a look at hurtful behavior between women from the perspective of both the target and the victim. The authors use groundbreaking brain research to explain why being the target of a woman's hurtful behavior and being socially excluded can be so excruciatingly painful to women. Holiday and Rosenberg offer compelling information for understanding the hidden dynamics (psychological, biological, social and media influences) that lead women to hurt or oppress women and that comprimise authentic female relationships. Mean Girls, Meaner Women is a riveting read for females interested in understanding women's relationships, building closer and more collaborative bonds with each other, and living authentically. Questions designed to help girls and women increase self awareness and add strength and depth to their relationships with each other are found throughout the book. Readers will also discover: how the female brain is wired to be more relatinal and suffer more hurt; the emotional cost of countless "no-win" situations including the "Original Sin of Being Female", the "Paradox of the Healthy Adult", and "Beauty and the Bind"; the role angry and competitive feelings between women has on authentic and deep connections; how being "different" could make you the target of hurtful behavior; how the media supports and reinforces hostile behavior through the "Money Shot"; behavior that catches the attention of the "Gender Police"; what women can learn from men about communicating with each other; and critical steps for healing and creating closer connections with women.

Product Details

• Paperback: 190 pages
• Publisher: Orchid Press (June 3, 2009)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0981972608
• ISBN-13: 978-0981972602
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 5.9 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #65,200 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

18 of 20 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A MUST READ FOR EVERY WOMAN OF ALL AGES!, November 29, 2009

By 

Rebecca B. (Dallas, TX) - See all my reviews

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This review is from: Mean Girls, Meaner Women: Understanding Why Women Backstab, Betray, and Trash-Talk Each Other and How to Heal (Paperback)

This book is absolutely a must-read for every woman of all ages! This book shed so much light on why women degrade, belittle, compete with and betray each other. It was an eye opening experience for me. The book, at first glance, seems to be a manual on how to deal with other women's devious tactics, but that is not the point of the book at all. Through stories and careful dissection of behaviors, interwoven with societal pressures/contributors, the authors detail what we are doing to ourselves (women vs. women) and how it is perpetuated by societal agendas/customs. This book did more to explain the issues between women than any other book I have ever read. I cannot stress enough how important this book is for EVERY woman to read for herself and to read to her daughter, her cousin, her mother, her sister, her friends...

This book is not about how to survive a demon woman or a group of them, this book is about recognizing what we are doing to each other and why and how to break the cycle. I plan on buying several copies for Christmas gifts in an effort to spread the word to all of the fabulous women in my life (sisters, cousin, friends...) about how we can finally end the hurtful competitiveness and act of maliciousness towards each other (women vs. women).

We finally have no excuse not to recognize how our behavior affects other women...some of the findings are absolutely shocking and quite saddening...but there is hope and we don't have to continue putting on a show for the sake of seeming like the best, the sexiest, the whatever superlative you want to insert here...

Rebecca

12 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Fantastic!, March 4, 2010

By 

Rebecca Cantrell "artist" (Seattle, WA) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Mean Girls, Meaner Women: Understanding Why Women Backstab, Betray, and Trash-Talk Each Other and How to Heal (Paperback)

Thank God somebody finally wrote an honest book about this. I've suffered terribly at the hands of other women all my life but felt guilty about talking about it because I was a Feminist. I didn't know how to conceptualize what had happened to me and secretly hated other women. Reading it was incredibly healing and I'd recommend it to anyone, woman or man, Feminist or not. Our society sets women up as "purity symbols" and discourages them from acting in ways that tarnish their image. This forces women to manipulate and hide their true feelings. I believe the only way forward for people trying to change the world is to deal honestly with human nature, female and male. The truth about what we end up doing to each other in this society is the first step toward change.

8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars My thoughts, September 23, 2009

By 

Christopher Reagan - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Mean Girls, Meaner Women: Understanding Why Women Backstab, Betray, and Trash-Talk Each Other and How to Heal (Paperback)

As a male, I found this book to be so informative. It not only allows for a better understanding of what the social world of women is like, but also gives a new perspective for anyone, male or female, who has had issues handling interpersonal relationships. A definite must read for anyone interested in gender issues.