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Ten Tips for Winning with Mean Girls at Work
Have you encountered a mean girl at work? A mean girl could be someone who seems jealous of your accomplishments, a woman who excludes you from important meetings, a female colleague who puts you down in public, or just someone whose poor work habits constantly get you into trouble. What ever her behavior is, it sets you off – leaving you feeling upset and unable to be your best professional self. Dealing with another woman’s cold or unkind behavior can be challenging, but you don’t have to be held hostage by it. Here are ten tips for WINNING with any mean girl at work:
1. Don’t take her bait – When a mean girl attacks, she’s looking for a reaction from you. If she attacks you in a meeting, she’ll want to see you angry or crying or otherwise upset. Getting a reaction from you gratifies the mean side of her.
2. Don’t believe that what she says is true – This rule is especially important when dealing with a mean girl who likes to gossip and spread rumors. If she comes to you with gossip, don’t get drawn in.
3. Don’t engage in negative speak about her –Why? Because you’re fueling the power struggle between the two of you. And you may end up looking like the pettier person.
4. Be friendly without being friends –If you discover that one of your colleagues acts in ways you don’t like, you don’t have to shut her out. Rather, you can maintain a cordial relationship with her where you only discuss the work at hand.
5. Aim for professional behavior at all times – We call this taking the High Road. Acting professional towards all women in your workplace – regardless of how you feel about them – is a key component of “winning” with mean girls.
6. Keep communication short and to the point –Aim for short, focused interactions with this woman where you only discuss essential work-related topics. Think, ‘Proper inter-office communication – no more, no less.”
7. Find a safe person to confide in – It’s best to find a confidante outside of the office setting who can hear your story and offer solid advice.
8. Don’t roll your eyes when she speaks –Rolling your eyes conveys impatience and irritation with what the other woman is saying. Check yourself to make sure you don’t do that or engage in other forms of non-verbal attacking.
9. Don’t avoid her – In an attempt to limit your exposure to the mean girl’s barbs, you may want to hide whenever you see her or find ways to minimize any contact with her. But if you avoid her, she’ll know that you fear her – and that puts you in a more vulnerable position.
10. Don’t take anything she says or does personally – this is the ultimate lesson when dealing with a mean girl. Whatever she’s doing, it’s not about you – even though her taunts have your name on them. Mean girls generally have poor self-esteem and are easily threatened. You aren’t the first person she’s mean to, and you won’t be the last.
This book is terrible. It is a string of PowerPoint bullit points disguised as a book. Presumably to make the content long enough to be considered a book, the authors label just... Read morePublished 1 month ago by Love to Read
I've made it part way through this book and recommended it to 2 other women. Instead of a counselor listening to u gripe about evil women at work it actually tells you how to deal... Read morePublished 2 months ago by Kindle Customer
Superficially helpful. Advice is a bit of the same. Once you've read one chapter, you've read them all. Recommended to younger professionals.Published 2 months ago by Jordan Valdes
I checked this book out at the library and thankfully didn't pay money for it. It might be 2.5 stars to leaf through for 40 minutes at the library. Read morePublished 4 months ago by Barbara L.
I borrowed this book from the library and found it to be SO amazing that I had to buy it! It's a must read for any female in the workplace. Read morePublished 4 months ago by karen burns
This book seems to repeatedly give the same advice, basically a drawn-out explanation that leads to "ignore her and try not to feel bad and do your own work. Read morePublished 5 months ago by Reader
The book is well written but it was short and repetitive. I think it is probably better for younger women entering the workforce. Read morePublished 7 months ago by ColoradoProfessional