Measure of the Heart: A Father's Alzheimer's, A Daughter's Return [Hardcover]

Mary Ellen Geist (Author), Oliver Sacks (Foreword)

Book Description

Publication Date: August 13, 2008

Mary Ellen Geist decided to leave her job as a CBS Radio anchor to return home to Michigan when her father's Alzheimer's got to be too much for her mother to shoulder alone. She chose to live her life by a different set of priorities: to be guided by her heart, not by outside accomplishment and recognition.

The New York Times wrote a front page story on Mary Ellen on Thanksgiving 2005. It was one of the most e-mailed stories for the month. Through her own story and through interviews with doctors and other women who've followed the "Daughter Track"--leaving a job to care for an aging parent--Geist offers emotional insights on how to encourage interaction with the loved one you're caring for; how to determine daily tasks that are achievable and rewarding; how the personality of the patient affects the caregiving and the progression of the diseases; as well as invaluable advice about how caregivers can take care of themselves while accomplishing the Herculean task of constantly caring for others.

Geist's years in journalism allow her to report on Boomers' caretaking dilemmas with professional objectivity, and her warm voice brings compassion and insight to one of the most difficult stituations a son or daughter may face during his or her life.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

For everyone who loves someone with Alzheimer's, Geist observes, there are markers and moments that tell you the disease is on the way. Her account of two years spent helping a person with Alzheimer's stay in this world is both travel guide and love story—neither in the conventional sense. As Geist makes her way, trying new things, failing, scratching plans, making mistakes, and starting all over again, she uses her professional skills as a journalist and TV anchor to incorporate conversations with other caregivers, consultation with experts and wide reading in the literature. Sensitive that Alzheimer's disease affects patients and spouses in many different ways, Geist offers helpful suggestions (using his words instead of trying to teach him mine) and practical advice (Doing activities alone is imperative to the survival of a caregiver). True, there was a downside to having to come home to help care for my father, but Geist's love of her parents and their love for one another is as palpable as the sadness wrought by the disease. To all readers, she offers a deeply affecting account of personal growth: I define myself and my life in a whole new way. These days, it is the measure of the heart that matters most to me. (Aug.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

From Booklist

In 2005, when Geist’s mother, Rosemary, could no longer single-handedly care for her Alzheimer’s-afflicted husband, Woody, Geist left her job as a New York afternoon radio news anchor and moved back to the family homestead in rural Michigan. Guess what she learned? That, despite years of long hours following breaking news stories, she couldn’t keep up with her mother. Every morning, Rosemary emerged from the master bedroom perfectly coiffed and ready for the day with a neatly dressed Woody in tow. Even as Woody plunged further into dementia, Rosemary managed to seamlessly fold care for her husband into everyday chores. It took two years of concentrated effort on Geist’s part to master some of the tasks Rosemary handled with aplomb. Through it all, Geist gained insight into the care and feeding of not just Alzheimer’s patients but caregivers as well. In a very personable style she shares tips, lessons learned (some the hard way), resources, and the experience of getting to know her father in a way not otherwise possible. --Donna Chavez

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 240 pages
• Publisher: Springboard Press; 1 edition (August 13, 2008)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0446580929
• ISBN-13: 978-0446580922
• Product Dimensions: 5.8 x 1.1 x 8.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #466,206 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Discover books, learn about writers, read author blogs, and more.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

16 of 16 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars a book I can whole-heartedly recommend, September 2, 2008

By 

Richard Fitzpatrick (Henderson, Nevada) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Measure of the Heart: A Father's Alzheimer's, A Daughter's Return (Hardcover)

About a year ago, I was exploring a relatively undiscovered island paradise in the South China Sea when I received a call telling me my father (age 92) and his wife (86) had been in an accident and both were in the hospital. As the only child, I naturally said I'd be there (rural western Michigan - more than 8,600 miles away) as soon as possible. When I commented something like "must have been a bad accident" the response was "the accident isn't the problem." Having an unstable VOIP connection, I let that comment drop and began making arrangement to head there (stopping off briefly at my home in Nevada). As soon as I got to the states, I had to confront the harsh reality: the accident wasn't the cause of the problem - it was the result of both of them having what was now diagnosed as "Senile Dementia of Alzheimer's type."
Flash forward 9 months. My life has adapted to a routine of flying to Michigan to spend a week or so each month with them -- while a couple wonderful paid 24/7 caregivers allow them the freedom to stay in their home. I'm fresh off a red-eye, driving a rent-a-SUV full of food and flowers and Depends heading to my parent's home when I hear on Diane Rehms' NPR show some woman addressing a challenging issue that I was also facing at the time (how to get an Alzheimer's patient to eat). Damn! She had some extremely helpful suggestions. As soon as I arrived, I implemented her concepts -- then went on-line with my laptop and ordered her book (Measure of the Heart) from Amazon. And I'm so glad I did.
More than merely a compendium of useful tips (even though it is also that) Mary Ellen Geist's book is an insightful and thought-provoking first-person perspective that will strike a resounding chord with anyone who has a friend or family member with this disease - as well as being a fascinating, touching story for any reader.
It is her very personal narrative of leaving the fast-paced, high-profile world of broadcast journalism in New York City to come home to Michigan and help care for her father who has suffered from Alzheimer's for 10+ years. With a delicate balance of humor and profound sadness, Mary Ellen gives voice to the heart-wrenching challenges that hundreds of thousands of us baby boomers now face in caring for our aging parent.
It is obvious from her book that her father was a brilliant, charming and gentle man. It also shines a light on the heroism of spousal caretakers like her mother, Rosemary. It weaves together this family's story with a very readable account of his slow transformation and deterioration. She addresses the complexity and array of emotions surrounding issues such as the loss of independence, unwanted personality shifts, struggle to communicate, and the unique power music sometimes has to transcend the pain.
This book is hard to put down. Then, on the other hand, there were times in reading her story (such as dealing with refusals to eat or patiently listening to the same story over and over) that touched me so deeply and personally, that I had to stop reading and put it down.
Mary Ellen acknowledges the difficulty of these situations honestly, while at the same time providing simple concepts that can help diffuse the issues by emphasizing a strategy of relating to patients in their own reality.
She used her fine journalistic investigative skills to learn everything she could about the disease's history and treatment options. The book is user friendly. It shows easy, day to day activities that can help patients feel a sense of connection and accomplishment.
This is book of courage, instruction, empathy and family loyalty. Certainly, there are numerous challenges that other families face which it does not address. Yet, it is what it is: her personal revelation of her family's story. This appears to be an exceptional family - she is certainly an extraordinary woman - and this is a book I can whole-heartedly recommend.

17 of 18 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars From the heart, July 29, 2008

By 

Kenneth M. Winter "Retired Editor & Publisher" (Petoskey, Michigan USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Measure of the Heart: A Father's Alzheimer's, A Daughter's Return (Hardcover)

Mary Ellen leaves her successful radio broadcast journalism career to earn the real Pulitzer Prize of life with this frank account of helping her mother deal with her father's Alzheimer's disease. Becoming a caretaker is challenging more than one can imagine, especially when it requires living 24/7 with the patient one loves. Mary Ellen and her sisters discover that their mother can no longer handle her husband's health care on her own, leaving the only single daughter to return home to Michigan. With vivid detail and description, Mary Ellen provides almost a daily journal of her and her family's desire to give Woody Geist, a life with dignity. Her emotional and sometimes humorous account offers the reader what it's really like to care for a loved with one, offering many practical questions and tips to consider when taking on the responsibility. The book is well-written and takes reveals what it's like to be one of the 10 million people caring for a person with dementia. "Measure of the Heart" is a must read for anyone considering or caring for a loved one. Mary Ellen, who has covered many difficult stories in her award-wining journalism career, discovers the most challenging one is right in her own family.

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars The Realities of Alzheimer's, September 14, 2008

By 

Marlys M. Styne "Author of 'Reinventing Mysel... (Chicago, IL USA) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)    (REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Measure of the Heart: A Father's Alzheimer's, A Daughter's Return (Hardcover)

As lifespans lengthen, it's an unfortunate reality that more and more of us are likely to encounter the tragedy of Alzheimer's Disease. In "Measure of the Heart," ambitious, successful California and New York radio news anchor and reporter Mary Ellen Geist tells of leaving her career to help her mother care for her father as he declines in the clutches of this terrible affliction.

Both an exlanation of Alzheimers and a personal caregiver's memoir, this book explores the tragic effects of the disease on the vctim and his family. As the disease progresses, the author learns to let herself be guided by her heart rather than by the pressures of her demanding career.

This very personal story helps to explain the devotion of Woody Geist's wife, daughters, and other family members to this nice, kind, cheerful former CEO who loves to play tennis and to sing, activities he is able to continue long after the disease strikes. The family's selfless devotion and refusal to put Woody into a care facility seem puzzling as the disease progresses, and yet their extraordinary love is admirable.

In addition to telling the victim's and caregivers' stories, this book explores and lists various resources: helpful organizations, publications, and web sites devoted to Alzheimer's and those dealing with it. The book makes fascination reading for anyone who has ever wondered about the disease or marveled at the dedication of those dealing with its victims. For anyone faced with an Alzheimer's diagnosis in the famiy, it should be required reading.