Customer Reviews

If You Meet the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him! The Pilgrimage of Psychotherapy Patients

5 star:		(18)
4 star:		(8)
3 star:		(4)
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1 star:		(2)

 

 

This book is a wonderful read for anyone who wonders, worries or agonizes about the meaning of life, and whether they're doing it "right." Psychotherapist Kopp wrote this book in 1972, but it still works today.

Whether giving or receiving therapy, this book reminds us that we are all humans -- nobody has all the answers. The eschatological laundry list (which I've seen roaming around the web, but never attributed to Kopp) has become a classic.

1. This is it! 2. There are no hidden meanings

3. You can't get there from here, and besides, there's no place else to go

4. We are all already dying and we'll be dead for a long time.

5. Nothing lasts!

6. There is no way of getting all you want.

7. You can't have anything unless you let go of it.

8. You only get to keep what you give away.

9. There is no particular reason why you lost out on some things.

10. The world is not necessarily just. Being good often does not pay off and there is no compensation for misfortune.

11. You have the responsibility to do your best nonetheless.

12. It is a random universe to which we bring meaning.

13. You don't really control anything.

14. You can't make someone love you.

I'll stop there -- there's more in the book, and if you find the list discouraging, you need to read the book. If you find the words encouraging, you need to read the book. Add it to your list of books to give friends who are feeling glum and hopeless.

Use it as a group discussion book!

After reading this (at different stages in my life), I still find it centering and soothing. A good addition to the self-help library, along with The Road Less Traveled.

It is easy for anyone to believe that it is always that other person - that one who knows something that we don't know; has something that we have given up on obtaining; or, looks like what we think is the best.

Killing the Buddha is looking deeply within ourselves, accepting our limitations, our attributes, and everything in between. We are the experts in the journey of our own lives. No one else is.

The subtitle, "The Pilgramage of Psychotherapy Patients," belies the essence of this highly literate hymn to authenticity and self-governance: each of us must look within to find our own answers. Drawing from the Bible, the I Ching, Siddhartha, Jung and too many others to name, the author urges that living fully requires us to let go of concepts of fairness, perfection and control and embrace the uncertainty and ambiguity of our journey. A liberating, thought provoking paean to autonomy, self acceptance and personal growth. Life Changing!

Sheldon Kopp captures the essence of therapist-client as a parallel journey of two human beings in a relationship dependent upon the ability of both to become careful (full of care) for the other while traveling through metaphors, symbols, sagas and myths, each telling their stories along the way. His eschatological laundry list is a necessary and existentially humorous bump with reality. I recommend this book to all clients seeking to enter the sacred ground of a therapeutic alliance where change, transformation and healing are to occur. Sheldon Kopp's serious pragmatism and humorous satire hold the reader to the task of "learning the dance" and becoming aware of the process of being in therapy.

To read this book is an experience -- to touch a work of genius. It still moves me 30 years later. Psychotherapy is an art; Life is an art; Sheldon Kopp an artist. Don't miss it and do remember to revisit it. His other books form a worthy body of work, and this one is as good a place as any to join in the flow.

Sheldon B. Kopp narrates his existential voyage through the human experience. It is definitely not quite nihilistic, but similar. Killing the Buddha on the road means that no meaning that comes from outside ourselves is real. We need only recognize that we already have our own Buddhahood. The secret is that there is none, and no solution, and it comes down to just being what you are. His philosophy from his pyschological context has some of the right ideas, but he spreads some of the wrong messages. I enjoyed the book however. He uses the telling of tales from our ancestors, metaphors for our struggle to fit into existence. I speculate that this is to emphasize our story-telling nature as animals. With his version of wisdom, there is no guru to teach us and we are no one's disciple. In this he is the messenger of bad news and expects to disappoint those who search in life as if there was some underlying meaning in the world. He's sure that its in vain, and ultimately so are our lives. If you are someone disturbed by this, then reading his book will transcend those feelings. If you aren't by now... I recommend it ;¤)

If there are questions in your head or you are not sure where you life is at then I highly recommend reading this book. Sheldon does an incredible job of putting together a simple guide for better self understanding. After reading this incredible piece of work I realized that i was "just another struggling human being" and no longer felt isolated and lost.

Just as Rogers was said to have taken the patient off the couch, Sheldon Kopp takes the therapist off his/her pedestal. A must-read for anyone who has ever struggled with the conflictual aims of the therapist and client in a therapeutic process. Unfortunately the latter chapters tend to be more autobiographical and the book loses some of it's impact.

"...enlightenment does not provide perfection. Instead, it simply offers the pedestrian possibility of living with the acceptance of imperfection."

-Sheldon Kopp

About five pages in I thought, "eh, not too good." but it certainly picked up. This book takes several personal and self esteem issues and looks at their possible root causes and how people have dealt with them through the centuries from an eastern perspective. This book is very Zen and if you aren't familiar with Zen, this is as good a place as any to get an introduction to it.

From the back cover: "The most important things that each man must learn no one else can teach him." Very true and much of this book is filled with great little nuggets like that with a koan here and there.

But don't get the idea this is Zen and Zen alone, there is a nice look at other stories including the epic of Gilgamesh, Don Quixote, Shakespeare, and of course the most influential book in the west- The Bible. This is the story of how each give glimpses into the thinks that make us tick (and tick wrong!).

A great book, a simple quick read. Pound for pound this is as good as it gets.