Customer Reviews

Don't Toss My Memories in the Trash-A Step-by-Step Guide to Helping Seniors Downsize, Organize, and Move

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I'm 61 years old. I live in a big house and have accumulated way more than I ever should have. Someday I'm going to have to downsize and deal with all the "stuff"--or someone will have to do it for me. That's when a book like this become a lifesaver. You couldn't ask for a more practical help.

Whether it's me who has to make the move, or my mom, it's a huge undertaking to even think about (let alone to actually carry out and finish!). A lot of emotion is involved when someone has to leave behind years of keepsakes and memories. What can we take with us? What will we try to sell (and how)? What could we give away? What will we have to throw away? Here's a book with answers--to make it all a little bit easier.

How do I decide it's time to move, or how do I convince my parents it is? Check out Part One. How do I sort through it all? Check out Part Two. What practical things should I be aware of when I move out (and when I move in somewhere else)? Check out Part Three. The book ends with over 25 pages of practical checklists: things that will have to be dealt with, all organized and ready.

The author has very clearly and concisely revealed the wisdom she's accumulated after years as a professional organizer and senior move manager. It's an easy read, a toolbox of experience. Every family should get this.

This amazing book fills a specific void in the decluttering realm- that of providing practical downsizing advice and solutions for seniors (or anyone, for that matter) moving into smaller quarters.
The first part of the book focuses on reaching an agreement that someone, most likely an elder parent, has to move, and this is usually after a lifetime of accumulating possessions. Dellaquila emphasizes, whenever possible, involving those who are moving. Participation in decision-making is the most important part, emotionally and psychologically. The stage is set for control dramas and unpleasant confrontations between generations even in the best of circumstances.
The middle of the book details many of the nuts and bolts of moving, such as how to decrease possessions, categorizing what to keep and ways to part with things that once generated memories of life in the past. This section addresses such topics as what to keep and how to dispose of different items (which arguably are unique to each family).
The last part of the book is a set of resources and checklists for moving, valuable to anyone relocating their household.
This book gives an excellent overview of what to expect as a member of the sandwich generation, those responsible for their parents' quality of life in their later years. It will also be an eye-opener for those who, as they live longer and longer, have to plan for this latter stage of their lives.

I ordered this book with high hopes that I would get useful insights from a professional organizer about how to help my 92-year old father move from the family home he has lived in for 60 years. I was disappointed to find a very generalized approach with little specific detail or tips and techniques that I could use. Rather than passing along her insights as a professional organizer, the author simply promotes the idea of hiring a professional organizer to help with the move. Many people do have the financial resources to hire a professional organizer nor access to one if they do not live in a populated area. Therefore, they rely on resources such as books to help them through the process. Unfortunately this book isn't a resource that will provide the required help.

Daddy was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease and Mother could no longer care for him alone. It was time for them to move onto the next stage in their life and move in with us. Selling their house and life-long collection of memories was more traumatic for my sister and me than for Mother. What were we to do?

Vickie Dellaquila has the answers in her book "Don't Toss My Memories in the Trash". This is a wonderful book to assist you with cleaning out the clutter but hanging onto the memories. For example: Keep a teacup and saucer and sell the rest of the china set or use one crystal goblet for a pencil holder.

"Don't Toss My Memories in the Trash" is written in an easy to read format with check lists, references, and resources. If not for yourself, buy this book for someone who is moving or downsizing. It will make an excellent gift.

I found this book to be extremely helpful. The numerous case studies gave me additional insight into the specific nuances of senior-downsizing. The appendices checklists, which offer point-by-point guides, are a wonderful resource for both professional organizers and for people doing their own downsizing. I recommend this book to all my senior relocation clients.

As someone who has aging parents I am starting to think about the time when they will need my assistance in downsizing. Having no idea where to begin I was very pleased to find this book. There were so many helpful tips to moving things that might seem useless to me in caring and sensitive ways. I really liked the personal stories that were scattered through out the book. I will also use the checklists in the back of the book so I will remember all there is to remember!

A very well written, easy to understand guide. Thanks so much for addressing a delicate subject!

This book is great for those of us working with the Senior population. The first of the book has great reminders about the possiblity of physicial limitations and the progression as well as things to consider when determining if a move is right. Also in the book, many case studies are used which give us greater insight into the population and the emotional aspects which go into downsizing. The resources in the back were a great addition and very helpful. I plan to provide this book as a door prize when speaking to groups about elder care issues.

Vicki Dellaquila does more than offer an organizing and moving guide; she covers ALL the bases, not just the typical "how to's". The book focuses on seniors who are downsizing and moving from homes they've lived in for many years and where they raised their families. Ms. Dellaquila helps seniors understand their feelings--that it is natural for them to feel challenged with letting go because of the emotional ties and treasured memories that are connected to the home. She has helpful suggestions on how they can take the memories with them without taking all the "things" they've accumulated through the years. She also provides a Moving Workbook to keep a record of everything.

This book is a must-have for seniors and for the families of seniors. The advice in this book would have been a great help to my husband and me when our parents were reaching their elder years. And, I'm glad that I have this now for when we are faced with decisions about downsizing.

Julie Molner Co-author of Your Life Your Way: The Essential Guide for Women, [...]

Unfortunately, contrary to the subtitle "a step by step guide", this book is mostly an infomercial as to the value of hiring a professional senior move manager and/or professional organizer. These individuals come to the home and work with their clients in 2-4 hour sessions, once or twice a week for multiple weeks. Obviously, their fees would begin to add up to a substantial sum. The author provides spot-on scenarios of seniors with whom she has worked, illustrating the many common situations, objections, and stumbling blocks that are often present in the process of having to sort and downsize. Thereafter, however, there is only a cursory few sentences as to how one is able to guide the senior past these objections. She mentions that she talks with the senior at length but does not go into the details of how to conduct such discussions. Instead, as all of her clients seem to be willing to go along with her logic, she jumps ahead to the process of discarding, donating,and passing on the possessions. I bought the book not as a guide in how to sort but instead a guide as to how to get past the desire to hold onto the possessions. It left me unsatisfied.

One of the best books for seniors and the family of seniors. This book helps to understand what emotions people go through when moving and downsizing. This book helps to let seniors understand why some relatives don't want their stuff, and alternatives to giving to family. Helps seniors know what they are feeling is normal, and alows family members to understand what a senior might be experience when moving. Excellent book. light reading. very informative.