Customer Reviews

Men and the Life of Desire

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I have had these tapes for 3 years now and have lent them to many men and women. When seeing that there was no review, I had to respond.

These 4 tapes (four hours) are a golden tapestry woven by three men who use combinations of ancient stories, poetry and psychology (stripped bare) to unmask the problems men face in todays relationships, work place and most of all, the talk of "what is desire". Poet Robert Blye (Iron John & Sibling Society), psychologist-author James Hillman and mythologist and story teller Michael Meade lead this 4 hour session interacting with 750 men.

The problems we face as men are great. With more than 50% of the homes in divorce, there is a hunger for the father and for mentors. Women don't want to be mothers to their men, they want men who can be responsible. Kids are killing each other and pressure is building on what is left of the family. Men have become soft, passive. Many have never been initiated, taken a mentor or have never gotten close to their elders. When the marriage comes under pressure, men and women run to their families and Lawyers, the men move out and and responsibility and outcome is decided by the court. The excerpt from Iron John that Blye recites about the work that the boy does "in the Walled Garden, where the lovers meet" meant so much more to me in this setting, combined with all the other material.

I loved James Hillman's translations of older cultures and language as well as his poking at the modern Therapy gurus. Blye, whose book Iron John lead me to these tapes, paints a very graphic view that our trouble, as men, has been evolving/growing long before the industrial revolution. Woodstock, Vietnam and now Clinton (who did not inhale) are just recent road signs on this journey. Michael Meade address and moves the throng with "Sooner murder an infant in it's cradle than nurse unattended desire" as well as his telling of "The Firebird" story. All three also recite many poems that are also included in "Rag and Bone Shop of the Heart" which is a compilation of all their favorite poems.

I have listened to these tapes many times and grown as a man as a result. As Michael Meade warns that "if you are seeking to understand desire you are courting trouble". The alternative is to go through life "just window shopping! You gotta buy something. Become part of the give and take". So try these tapes, men (and women) and find out that there is more.

I've listened to this set of tapes dozens of times, and get something new out of it every time. If you want "7 easy steps to being a man", these tapes are not for you. But if you've come to understand that the "male mode" occupies an indispensible mythic and practical place in our world, you've found compatriots and mentors in Bly, Hillman and Meade. Recorded live, and lovingly edited, these tapes are packed with content. I'm ordering another set because I'm wearing my current copy out!

I heard these tapes first in 1992 when a friend forced tape #1 into my deck as we were driving from Fresno to San Francisco. Twenty minutes later I realized I was listening to a conversation by men, for men, that was critical to my own development as a man. Amazing stuff... way beyond my ability to translate into words. Now fifteen years later, these tapes still hold their value as to my ongoing growth. I have purchased several copies as gifts for men & women... they all value them as I do. If you can find any copies purchase them, and turn you commute time, into the part of the day you enjoy the most. Their value is beyond measure. The rating goes to 5... but I give it a 50