From the Publisher
Within the pages of this book are Twelve Simple Secrets that I developed after interviewing hundreds of men. These Secrets will allow you to peek into the heretofore well-guarded private recesses of a mans heart and soul. As if by magic, the Secrets will cause your man to treat you more and more like a queen. He wont be able to help himself. Hell respond as if in a trance. Hell begin to change in ways you had hoped he would in the beginning of your relationship, ways in which you probably gave up on long ago.
Twelve Simple Secrets that will change your life.
Do you still believe in romantic love? Do you long to have it be a part of your relationship? Are you willing to admit that you want the little-girl dreams of a handsome prince carrying you off to his castle to live happily ever after? Youre not alone. Most women do.
Some people say the fairy tales created the dream. I believe the fairy tales were written because the dreams were a natural outcome of many womens deep heart longings to be cherished and adored; to be protected and cared for; to be thought of as beautiful in the eyes of a man who would do anything, even slay dragons, for her love. But somewhere along the way, the minutia of daily life filled the void and you almost forgot about the dream almost. Instead, you settled; settled for comfortable, settled for occasional, settled for "It could be worse." Once you know all Twelve Secrets, youll no longer be settling because youll watch your relationship change, right before your eyes effortlessly and discover that your fantasies are beginning to come true.
Expectations only disappoint us.
The expectations that many women carry to the altar are pretty high. Most men fall shortoften quite shortof those expectations. But the Secrets revealed in the pages of this book can make most any man become more like that mythical Prince Charming. Hell become more attentive, more romantic, more loving, more caring, and a lot of everything else you dared not hope for.
A man doesnt usually pay much attention to his relationship. Either it works or it doesnt. A woman is more attuned to the subtle nuances that give her what she craves within her relationship or not. As you read this book, youll feel yourself shifting from within, and youll find yourself interacting with your husband or boyfriend in brand new ways. As you shift, he will. Like the Pied Piper, you lead and he follows. As you learn the Secrets, and take them to heart, youll see how truly simple it is to completely transform your relationship.
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For several years, I facilitated womens self-discovery workshops. I heard the heartache and disappointment that surrounded their relationships. I saw the destruction that divorce and crushed dreams could cause. I watched women cry, held them in my arms, and wiped their tears.
I could empathize because I grew up wanting the same dream. I had a good marriage for almost thirty years, but there wasnt any passion or romance. I used to cry myself to sleep, silently huddled on my side of the bed. He was a good man, I told myself, but a lot was missing for me. After twenty-seven years of marriage he began to do things that I could not respect. After a difficult year-and-a-half struggle, we divorced.
Ive since discovered what its like to be with a romantic, passionate man who makes me feel beautiful and womanly, a generous man who cherishes and adores me, who wants to take care of me and make me happy, and I will never again settle for less. Thats what fulfills my deepest hearts desire. Thats what makes me feel most fully and completely a woman.
People ask me how I came to know these Secrets about men. Very simply, I made men a focus of study. Im very intuitive and, because of the self-discovery workshops I facilitated over several years, I developed the skill of understanding people. It served me when it came time to understand men.
Throughout this book I make some pretty bold and broad generalizations about men, and sometimes about women. Obviously, there will be exceptions to each and every claim I make. After all, we are all individuals. But almost without exception, men have agreed wholeheartedly with each of the Secrets, and theyre grateful that Im sharing this information with women. Believe it or not, just about every man I spoke to agreed with the following comment made by a window salesman from Houston. "Theres nothing that comes anywhere near what it feels like to love and be loved by a woman. My wife makes everything else worthwhile."
We can learn from ancient cultures.
Because cultural anthropology is my educational background, when I ponder why we do the things we do, I come from a larger perspective. I use logic and intuition in concert with what I have learned about psychology, culture, biology, evolution, as well as anthropology. Could my conclusions be wrong? Of course. Are they useful? Absolutely! If you believe as I do that love and trust grow out of greater understanding, then youll agree that every shred of wisdom adds depth to your relationship and your ability to create everlasting love. The Secrets revealed in this book will open your eyes so much so that youll feel as if youve been blind.
Ive been blessed to be able to travel all over the world. Ive been particularly interested in visiting tribal cultures in places like Papua New Guinea, Indonesia, and Africa. Ive seen most of the tribal behavior that I discuss in this book, much of which is driven by, and evolved because of, survival. Comparing what Ive observed firsthand to the ancient cultures I learned about in my studies of cultural anthropology, its obvious that not much has changed. I used what I know of cultures today and made conclusions about how life for ancient men and women might have been, and compared it to our modern ways of interacting and behaving. Understanding creates more harmony.
Youll have amazing leverage once you can look beneath your mans outer shell, the one that has all the answers, never gets emotional, and doesnt quite understand why you want romance. Not only does this book give you some reasons for his sometimes frustrating behavior, it also points out why you and he are so very different. Once you understand that much of what he does and how he reacts is a variety of automatic responsessuch as needing to succeed, to solve problems, and how easily hes arousedyou will be better equipped to get what you want from him and your relationship.
Culturethat which we learn and pass onis as powerful in determining our behavior as physical evolution, and in many ways, even more so. Personal pride, integrity, competition, and of course the all-powerful social shame can do wonders to keep us in line. Culture is strong, but it can be overridden when you know what to do.
We want more from our relationships.
Today, thankfully for most of us, survival is not in the forefront of our concerns. Quality of life is what we care about. We want more from our experiences and from our relationships with others. The Twelve Simple Secrets will give you more of what you want because the seemingly Grand Canyonsized chasm that separates men from women can actually be bridged.
On the next page you will begin a playful adventure that will carry you to new places of the heart. A glorious new life filled with the magic of ever-deepening love awaits you. Come, follow me to a cottage by an enchanted forest, filled with dreams-coming-true and happily-ever-afters. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.