Customer Reviews

Men on Rape: What They Have to Say About Sexual Violence

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This book is a selection of men's reactions and attitudes to rape. Some of it is interesting, but the majority of the book is rather disturbing. A large variety of males seem to think that rape is not really something that one should get too worked up about! There is a quote by a lawyer in the book about how he would feel guilty if he didn't do his best to get his client off of a rape charge, but who says that allo the same, he would "kill" anyone who touched his wife. Another man states that a woman who was raped by a plumber that she had let into her house to fix some of her pipes was basically "asking for it" because if she didn't want sex, she shouldn't have let him into the house! How supposedly decent guys can excuse such monstrous behaviour is beyond me. Other men who although castigating the act of rape themselves, say that the act turns them on when they read about it. Not all of the men in the book are so insensitive, but all in all it makes for a rather upsetting read, especially for anyone who has female friends and relatives that they care about.

A fascinating, if slightly reductive (ok, it is from the 80s) attempt to illustrate male attitudes about rape, both as a cultural concept and a violent action that intrudes on human life. The interviews are largely dispriting, especially those conducted with partners of women who had been raped. I expected less willfull misunderstanding on the parts of these men. The one "upside" to their narratives is that they clearly felt compelled to some kind of honesty - no one could call their selfish, needy behavior and ignorant lack of concern for their partners any kind of sugar coating.

That said, Beneke is clearly sympathetic to the plight of women in a so-called "post" feminist world where in theory there are as many options open to women as to men. The introduction is a must read - every adolescent in sex ed should be given a copy - as it so brilliantly highlights the ways in which our culture keeps men and women in their own dark corners, to the detriment of partnerships, casual interaction, and gender relations on the whole.