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Men & Women Paperback – May 11, 1993

12 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

From the Back Cover

What does it take to get along for a lifetime? Men and women share a deadly problem that kills good relating. The problem is this: we are committed, first of all, to ourselves. Each of us, without blushing, holds fast to an overriding concern for our own well-being. Giving numerous examples from his counseling and speaking ministry, Crabb explores how we can turn away from ourselves and toward each other, how we can become what he calls "other-centered." Dr. Crabb maintains that men and women are different in important ways that, if understood and honored, can lead to a deep enjoyment of one another, an enjoyment that can last forever.

About the Author

Dr. Larry Crabb is a well-known psychologist, conference and seminary speaker, Bible teacher, popular author, and founder/director of NewWay Ministries. He is currently Scholar in Residence at Colorado Christian University in Denver and Visiting Professor of Spiritual Formation for Richmont Graduate University in Atlanta. Dr. Crabb and his wife of forty-six years, Rachael, live in the Denver, Colorado area. For additional information please visit www.newwayministries.org

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 240 pages
  • Publisher: Zondervan; Reprint edition (May 23, 1993)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 031033831X
  • ISBN-13: 978-0310338314
  • Product Dimensions: 5.2 x 0.6 x 8.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (12 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,291,629 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Dr. Larry Crabb is a well-known psychologist, seminar speaker, Bible teacher, author, and founder/director of NewWay Ministries. In addition to various speaking and teaching opportunities, Dr. Crabb offers a week-long School of Spiritual Direction and a weekend conference, Life on the Narrow Road. He is also Scholar in Residence at Colorado Christian University and serves as Spiritual Director for the American Association of Christian Counselors. His many popular books include Inside Out, Finding God, Becoming a True Spiritual Community, The PAPA Prayer, Soul Talk, and his life work, 66 Love Letters. For additional information visit www.newwayministries.org.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

12 of 12 people found the following review helpful By Tango Dancer on December 30, 2005
Format: Paperback
I originally discovered this book at the library. The title caught my attention so I checked it out, and I am so glad I did! This book is very unlike any other relationship book I have read thus far, (from the Christian perspective anyhow, some of Dr. Crabb's sentiments about gender differences are echoed by Dr. Laura, John Gray, and others). His approach to explaining differences is both humble and enticing. For women who struggle to overcome a very feminist background in which the term "submission" causes the hair on our neck to rise, his book is palpable and invites one to examine his or her motives.

Dr. Crabb's explanations are such that your mind and heart remain open to receiving something profound. This book is beneficial not just for individuals struggling in relationships, but singles as well, the premise being one that reminds us that our main enemy in life is selfishness and the only freedom from a life lived in a self-centered prison is one which focuses on other-centered living: how true, and how simple. As the Word says, "the truth will set you free," indeed, the truth as it is presented in this book, if humbly embraced, has the capacity to do just that.
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24 of 28 people found the following review helpful By Jamie Winkler on July 28, 2000
Format: Paperback
This book is a must read for everybody, whether you plan to get married or stay single all your life. It uncovers the true source of all conflict in human relationships and provides the remedy as well! Shock!.
Have you been abused? Mistreated? This book is definitely for you. It is the answer that we all need to hear whether we want to or not. It's gentle and truthful. It will knock your socks off, and massage your feet!
This is another one of the best books I've ever read.
I can't put it down. I read it over and over and each time I find something else I didn't see before. At times you'll want to read ahead to see where the author is going. It is just that intriguing. I found myself getting frustrated the first time through it. I kept asking out loud, "Will you please get to the point?" But man... woman! was it ever worth it. I'm ready to get married again! *lol*
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By LindaT VINE VOICE on August 21, 2009
Format: Paperback
For the most part, Dr. Crabb has aimed his book at Christian couples. And several things I can wholeheartedly agree with:

1. A lot of marital unhappiness can come from being too self-centered and not other-centered enough.

2. A person's needs for security and significance are ultimately met in his or her personal relationship to God through Jesus Christ, and this is the most important part of life to nurture and build.

Beyond that, though, I have a problem with a basic idea in Dr. Crabb's thinking. He asserts that a man's main need is "significance" and a woman's main need is "security." And I think that he makes this into too much of a system. While he will say that men need security and women need significance, I think he arbitrarily names men's desires "significance" and a woman's desires "security" when they may not be. I've always been leery of stereotyping people.

Now I must admit that as a woman I like security -- especially financial! And I like the "security" of being loved by my husband. But I still want to make some accomplishments in life apart from who I'm married to. I'm a writer, musician and teacher, and those make up as much of my life as my domestic side, and recognition in these areas will probably be more important to my SIGNIFICANCE desire than my SECURITY desire -- unless, of course, I receive a large cash award and that will make me feel more SECURE! (Hmmm -- maybe that will bolster Dr. Crabb's theory a bit more.)

Take the good that you can out of this book -- and there's a lot of it. But I would say to both men and women: don't let anyone stereotype you because of your gender.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Steven H Propp TOP 50 REVIEWER on May 15, 2013
Format: Mass Market Paperback
Lawrence ("Larry") J. Crabb, Jr. is a psychologist, author, teacher and speaker, who is Spiritual Director for the American Association of Christian Counselors, and since 1996 has been Scholar-in-Residence of Colorado Christian University. He has written many other books such as Effective Biblical Counseling, Basic Principles of Biblical Counseling, Finding God, Inside Out, The Silence of Adam, etc.

He wrote in the Preface to this 1991 book, "The older I get, the more I cling passionately to a handful of truths that seem increasingly important... One of those truths is that the beginning of the gospel is the message of judgment, but its central jewel is forgiveness... A second truth is this: when our identity is legitimately affirmed, we will become more distinctively masculine and feminine in all of our relationships... This book revolves around these two beliefs... For me, the idea that the gospel centers on the wonder of ongoing forgiveness and the view that men and women... are enjoyably different at their core both fall into the category of 'things I have learned and become convinced of.'" (Pg.
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