Customer Reviews

Mentor Manager, Mentor Parent: How to Develop Responsible People and Build Successful Relationships at Work and at Home

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Combines management tips with proven parenting advice that I can use at home and at work.

I love this book. I read it as a parent looking to work more effectively with my middle school son. Found the advice so helpful in improving my relationship with him and empowering him to use his critical thinking skills and learn from his own successes/failures. I love doing more with him, versus to and for him. An excellent tool to create more internal motivation for people you interface with. I find it's system matches the latest trends in education such as the STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, and Math) curriculum that the US is trying to bring to our students. STEM's goal is to create critical thinkers from problem based learning with the intent to continue the US's position as a world leader in scientific innovation. The parenting skills I learned from Cecile herself, and from reading this book, have given me the tools to create our family goals/values,scaffold around them, and have my son step up to own how he's going to meet those. When he owns it, he does it. When he does it, he feels self actualized and capable. My parenting is then a success. I know I used some of her methods inadvertently when I was in technical field sales and managed an inside sales team. I loved her concrete presentation of personal communication styles, and the foibles in some methods (Boss/Martyr), and the keys to the more effective ones (Mentor). Jack Welsh of GE revolutionized business models in the 80's, as he was all about empowering the individual employee and focusing on collaborative problem solving. Cecile's methods totally match that model supported in today's businesses well. She offers great tools that will shape the future soft skills of my children for industry and great tools to improve overall family relationships in our household.

This is an excellent resource for parents. We own a business and have two kids. The parallels between the two groups are surprising. The authors have insights and life experiences that bring their advice full circle with examples and recommendations on how to have successful experiences and communications in both arenas. We have shared this many times over with friends and relatives. It even works for teenagers and spouses! We HIGHLY recommend it.

A definite must for anyone who is developing people. Be it trainers, coaches, parents, or managers. I've applied the mentoring techniques at home and work, and I can already see a difference. Employees are developing quicker, my child is learning better, and I see far fewer tantrums from both groups. Thank you!

This is such a great book to help you understand not only the kind of parent you WANT to be, and how to do it, but also to understand the kind of parent you become when you are tired, frustrated, or otherwise not at your best. The book not only helps you understand your primary style, but also your secondary style, the one you most likely slip into unknowingly in those not so charming moments of real family life. It was also particularly useful because my husband could connect more easily first to the workplace examples offered, and then transfer that understanding into family life.

Overall, the book is an easy, good read for anyone interested in improving their communication skills and relationships in general, both at home and in the work place. The authors provide a revealing self-test at the start of the book as well as worksheets throughout. (Hint, hold onto your answers from the self-test as you will use them throughout the other chapters in the book)!
The authors describe four control styles or personality types. Don't be surprised if your style at home and at work differ. Once you know your style, you can glean the advice and suggestions that apply to you personally. The book does not speak condescendingly to any particular group, in fact, it is as the title suggests, in mentors and encourages and even provides worksheets for practice (pssst....no one has to see your worksheets but you)!
It will help to reveal your strengths and weaknesses and better equip you to resolve conflict both on a personal and professional level. Of course, taking into consideration the emotions and values of both parties involved in the communication process. Whether intended or not, it seems as though the underlying principle involved is the value of each person as an individual, their beliefs and their emotions. We have no control over the emotions as they arise, but we do to some degree have control as to how we deal with them and how we deal with our emotions affects others.
Although the authors coin the term "control style," the book does not promote controlling behavior in a negative sense. Rather, it promotes a mentoring behavior that preserves the relationship, nurturing the relationship and the individual.
The book takes you from the place of identifying your values and relating them to the child or employee. Once that has been established, you eventually work up to the point of letting go. The passing of ownership of choices, decisions and responsiblity of actions to the child or employee, whatever the case may be. That is the goal of the book, to produce responsible, self-directed persons while preserving your relationship in the process.
Overall, I liked the book and the motivational style in which it was written. If I had any dislikes, it would have been some of the real life scenario's and the seemingly perfect endings. One begins to think, this is too good to be true. But those thoughts are quickly diminished as you read further along in the book to find that not every scenario is a win-win.
I would recommend this book for personal and professional use. It is not often you find a book with universal principles that can be applied to all aspects of your life.