Customer Reviews

Micah (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, Book 13)

5 star:		(62)
4 star:		(53)
3 star:		(69)
2 star:		(84)
1 star:		(165)

 

 

For a long while this series was a favorite of mine. All of the books up through Obsidian Butterfly are top notch and worth the price. The Anita character was very likable. Unfortunately, my interest has taken a nose-dive as the books become more and more about Anita and her vast amount of sex partners. Don't get me wrong, I love a well-written sex scene, but I really don't need the sex scene to go on and on and on and on to the point that I'm beyond bored and have fallen into catatonia. As far as Anita's armory of sex partners, I really care about very few of them. I love Richard because I love to hate Richard. I love Jean Claude because he's...Jean Claude. Micah is a likeable character, but I don't find him necessary. Asher & Damien are too much work. Nathaniel should die a thousand deaths exposed to the red-hot heat of 10,000 suns. Please, Nathaniel, die. Die. Die. He's so needy is makes me tired and I want to take a nap. That's enough about the series as a whole. On to Micah, the novella...

There's not much to say. I somehow managed to chug through the book to the point that Micah reveals that his girlfriend left him because his member was too large. At that point I threw the book across the room and began banging my head against the wall while alternately laughing manically and speaking gibberish as all my brainpower had been completely depleted. Several hours and a brain recharge later I picked up the book and put it in the trash. I couldn't bear to read anymore past Micah's member. It was so ridiculous up to that point that I had been pushed past patience.

Honestly, I'm not looking forward to the release of Danse Macabre. I imagine it will be more boundless sex and a teensy weensy bit of sexless plot. I'll begin reading Laurell K. Hamilton again when I read some reviews on Amazon that Anita has gotten back to her roots. I want my carnage. For now, I'll move on to other equally talented authors.

Micah. The one character in the Anita Blake series that nobody really wants to see more of -- really, we've heard too much about his physique already.

And because of this, Laurell K. Hamilton has turned out a very short novella, "Micah," to show off her latest creation and his enormous member. "Micah" has many of the same problem as her latest books -- too much emphasis on sex, annoying attitude -- but it's also horribly boring and unnecessary.

Anita Blake is woken when a coworker calls her. A federal witness died before he could be put on the stand, and the coworker can't go, since his wife is suffering a miscarriage. So Anita hops on a plane. But since she needs the occasional quickie to feed the ardeur, her boyfriend Micah tags along.

Though Anita has been shacking up with Micah for the last year or so, she actually doesn't know much about him -- he's a wereleopard, has kitty-cat eyes, and that's about all. But as they spend time alone together (no Jean-Claude, alas, and no Richard), Anita begins to find out what her boyfriend's past contains.

Here's a warning for potential readers: "Micah" is short. Very short. Too short for its size. It strains to fill the few hundred pages of its length. In fact, it's more like a longish short story than a novella, really.

And at the end of the day, "Micah" commits that cardinal sin -- it's completely unnecessary. There's not much of a plot, no exposition, no new revelations worth knowing. There isn't even any excitement until the ending of the book, and that peters out quickly.

Even Hamilton doesn't seem terribly enthusiastic. She's going through the motions: unimaginative (and sometimes gross) sex, lots of Anita whinging, and soap-opera angst about Micah (horrors!) being a good boyfriend. The writing suffers the most, since there's little detail and equally little atmosphere. The sex scenes, of course, are the exception. We get too much detail in those.

Admittedly, Hamilton DOES try to give Micah new dimensions as a character, by giving him a traumatic background. Unfortunately, this trauma is that his girlfriend dumped him because Micah's Magnificent Member was, uh, too big for her to handle. It will move readers to tears... of laughter. And you can only imagine how the Magnificent Member's, uh, size has an impact on the rather icky sex scene that follows. Although since they have been together for a year, it's not clear why the size is suddenly such a problem.

With "Micah," Laurell K. Hamilton has served up a pint-sized story that doesn't really accomplish anything. It's not much of a story, but somehow that seems appropriate for someone who is not much of a character.

I knew that I should not buy this book. The series has been getting worse and worse. I think that I actually did not buy the last one in this series.

But I read the DG quote, and sure enough, my hand reached out and bought the book.

What an awful excuse of a book. It is nothing more than a very poor short story. It is bulked out with improbable sex talk and rehashing of old details.

I get it, I get it... Laurell Hamilton likes her men in short shorts and ankle-length hair. The sex-toy men in both of her series are amply lock-endowed. Her books have become self-indulgent to an absurd degree. Don't get me wrong -- I like a steamy scene as much as the next person, but LKH is not even pretending to have plots anymore. Her heroine in this book is boring and stupid.

This book was so bad that I am actually going to toss it. I could not even finish it, as it became a grindingly unpleasant, pointless waste of time.

I liken the Anita Blake series to this: A South African Safari. You read the promotional literature and it is full of amazing creatures, beautiful and fantastical scenery, and drama. So you book the trip. You pay your money. And you get there and it is everything the promo materials promised, and then some.

But on the 3rd day of the Safari, you notice less wildlife. Pretty soon there are houses, farms, and businesses, but you figure, "Hey...maybe there is more safari stuff on the other side of the town"...so you stay on the bus and wait it out. After all...you've invested in this trip. You want to see it through.

But the next thing you know, you're in downtown Johannesburg parked in front of a XXX theater. Seems that the tour director has decided she's had enough of wildlife and natural scenery, and that the rest of your trip will be spent touring the seedy underbelly of the Johannesburg porn industry. Hey - that's the Tour Director's perogative...it is, after all, her tour. And some people may not mind the change. But me...I mind. It's not what I paid for.

And for me, that just about sums up this book, and the direction LKH has taken in the Anita Blake series. What began as a foray into an exciting alternate universe full of well-developed plot lines and characters has degraded into a tour of LKH's sexual fantasies. And I really have no interest in that tour. I read "Micah" hoping for a return to the Anita Blake of old. No luck there. And I'm not holding my breath that Danse Macabre will be any better. And if, as I fear, it isn't, well...I will have had it with this series and this author.

First there were the anthologies - "Out of this World" and "Cravings". Both contained "short stories" by LKH, which were in reality chapters of soon-to-be released hardbacks. Then there was "Bite", which was 30 miserly pages, even though LKH was the headliner. Those 30 pages were a teaser for her - you guessed it - next hardback. Now we have Micah. On her website, LKH terms it a novelite, and says it is the first of many involving Anita's many lovers. Micah is not a cutesy little coined word, novelite, but rather a short story that should have been in an anthology. As many other reviewers have pointed out, if Micah was wrote in regular font, with regular margins and no blank insert pages, Micah would be around 125 pages. The story was also a real disappointment. Anita has reverted back to whining Anita. Micah remains a cardboard character, despite LKH's attempts to flesh him out. The story was good for about 2 chapters. I loved the graveyard scene. Just as it was really getting good, Anita gets knocked out, wakes up in the hospital to a new power (happens every book) and everything is just as it was before Micah was ever wrote - except for the new power. In the past, I thought that LKH's publisher was really taking advantage of her fans, and that LKH had no say in it. That may have been true then, but I'm not buying it now. In the past few years, LKH has moved into the realm of Nora Roberts, Stephen King, Louie Lamour, etc. She is one of the big guns. While a regular author has no say in her books lay-out, cover, title, etc., the big authors do. Ethics, anyone? Bottom line, don't buy this book or any of the future planned, "novelites". They are a waste of your money. Notice I didn't say a waste of time, because you will hardly spend any time reading these ripoffs.

This book was obviously some previously dropped chapters from one of her other books. Anything to make money and according to her fansite, I am in the majority. Therefore I will not be buying her next hardback. Bad enough that "Incubus" had no plot and boring sex. I recommend that the author re-read her first novels.

I wonder why I have to be constantly reminded that this is Laurell Hamilton's series and she can write it how she wants. Yes, it IS her series, these ARE her books, and she is completely free to destroy them if she wants to. 'Micah' goes down the same road as the last three books. And since Hamilton herself said that the current direction of the series is because she's 'contrary' and tired of the 'vocal minority' complaining about the sex and character assassination, the argument that she's just following the characters' lead doesn't hold water. Especially since the translated dedication of the book is "Don't let the b-----ds grind you down." In mispelled Latin.

All that said, no, my expectations weren't high for this book and Hamilton still managed to live down to them. I'm not sure whether to blame the publisher, Hamilton, or both for unusually wide margins and a larger-than-normal font for an already short book. 40 of the 285 pages were an excerpt from the upcoming Danse Macabre, so I think full paperback price was a bit of a rip-off, especially since this story, minus pages of complaining, could have been packed into seventy pages max.

And as usual, the 'zombie raising' described on the cover was thrown in at the very end as an apparent afterthought. There was mercifully only one (lengthy) sex scene, but since Anita has been having sex with Micah for some time now without being hurt, why she would be damaged you-know-where to the point of bleeding by his enormous you-know-what doesn't make much sense. And three books after his introduction is a little late to be informing the reader's of Micah's absolutely monstrous enormousness. Not that it's an incredibly important detail for someone NOT interested in every bump, grind, scratch, and moan of Anita's numerous sexcapades, but it just doesn't follow as something worth discussion. Of course, this level of irrelevant and vaguely disgusting information is par for the course, now.

If you managed to like Incubus Dreams, you'll probably like this book. If, however, you were hoping for something with a plot that doesn't revolve around Anita's nonstop complaining (and I'm still not clear on how complaining constitutes a plot) then borrow this book, but don't bother buying it.

I honestly did not think she could have gotten any worse than what she had been pulling off in her Merry series, yet, Hamilton did the unthinkable and actually made an even more boring book.

I remember reading long, long ago an interview with her where she was complimented on her realistic sex scenes. What was put in this book was nothing short of a cheesy, cheap porn movie. I'm not talking B movie, I'm talking all the way to z. ZZZZZZZZZ When I tried to picture the description Hamilton gave of the act, all I could picture was Micah going on and on about his huge member (woe is me) and Anita having a seizure. I mean what was all that bouncing and waving of her appendages for anyway?

In her attempts at a plot we have Anita going off out of town to raise the dead and has to argue with a judge and attorney before she can do the deed. But of course, not before Micah has to step in and hold her? How professional is that? Then there is the FBI agent that accuses her of being easy. She gets all huffy, puffy about it (What for? She IS easy), yet, when the same FBI agent finds out about her living with two men and having sex with them AND sleeping with both of them at the same time, he doesn't even lift an eyebrow.

There was sooooo many inconsistancies the story becomes more of an aggrevation and not entertainment. I'm at the point where I check Hamilton's books out at the library so I don't spend any money and read them only so that I can laugh at the poor characterization and creepy sex scenes.

BOOOO!

Please don't waste your money on this book. Anita now has *four* types of lycanthropy? Hmmm. And she doesn't "shift" not even a little bit? Hmmmm. Anita has a boyfriend who treats her kindly and has an gigantic [...]? Hmmm. She's tried bondage, blood play, rape fantasy, beastiality, necrophilia, and group sex. Now she's decided to take little mini vacations for some one on one action? HMMMMMMMM.

Everything here has been done before. Over and over and over. There is nothing new, nothing fresh, nothing interesting. We get to learn a bit more about Micah and what we do learn is that his troubles all revolve around his male member. Did I mention that it is gigantic?

I believe that Hamilton has finally gone around the bend. She does women everywhere a diservice. She plays on the old stereotype that every woman wants a man with a plus size member. She makes women look shallow, vain and idiotic.

And what the heck is up with that dedication? Did Hamilton *finally* get around to reading her own message board? Are the "haters" (ie: anyone who doesn't worship at the throne of her porn obsession (and very BAD porn at that) ) getting through to her? Obviously they are, but not in the right way. Instead she seems more determined than ever to eject every element of plot and character development and simply string together cliche after cliche.

Ugh. I will never buy another Hamilton book.

It has been sometime since Ms. Hamilton has written an Anita Blake book of any interest. I gave the additional star for keeping the gratuitous sex to one scene (mind you - the scene took two chapters).

The plot is thin: The fact that the book opens with her going on a business trip as replacement for a co-worker is basically a weak vehicle for the aforementioned sex scene. Any real bad guy/good guy action - or (perish the thought) Anita actually doing something that doesn't involve group sex or arguing about the same - happens in the last 20 pages of the book!

Was this book badly written? No, but it wasn't all that interesting either.

And just in case we need to stir up some interest in the next episode of "As Anita Turns" we get a 'special preview' of the newest Anita Blake novel. And what does this start with? An argument about sex of course.

Ms. Hamilton should do her fans a favor and instead of milking, this once very interesting and exciting series for, every fan dollar she can get to just take a break until she can write a story that doesn't soley rely on sex and disfunctional relationships.