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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Don't let the title fool you, February 5, 2006
This review is from: Midlife Crisis at 30 (Mass Market Paperback)
Ignore the title and ignore the front cover--this is not a sappy gripe book. This book is a challenge, and the question it asks is: Why are Baby Boomers' Daughters Melting Down Instead of Rallying for Change?
The first part of the book helps to answer the first part of the question: baby boomers' daughters are melting down because we have been raised to expect that we can "Have it All," and, if we don't have it all (perfect job, perfect relationship, perfect kids) by age 30 we start to wonder why (and we assume it's our own fault).
The result is that most 25- to 35-year-old working women are dissatisfied, unhappy, and not looking forward to the rest of our lives--but each of us thinks we're fighting these demons alone. Macko and Rubin have done their research. They include statistics and surveys to make sense of what is going on with us, and they include short personal narratives from women they've interviewed who are trying to make their way through the maze.
But they do not stop there. The second part of the book challenges us to rally for change by giving real-life examples of women who have figured out how to balance the triple roles of professional, wife, and mother (or, in some instances, women who have found happiness with just two of those three roles). These women have not had easy lives, but they share how they came through the turmoil they felt at 30 to the workable balance they now have after 30. No two stories are the same--each woman found her own answers in her own way.
I didn't know that I needed this book until I read it. Now that I've read it, I'm convinced that all of my friends (and you, and all of your friends) need to read this book, and take it to heart.
I'll end with this quote, from Iris Krasnow's segment in the second part of the book:
"The most important point I can express is to tell young women not to want anyone else's life. It's a myth to think that anyone has it more together than you do or that someone is far happier than you are. . . . What I've learned as I mature is that the more I dare to be myself, the more I get to have a life built on joy and adventure and peace."
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8 of 9 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Great Idea, but the authors didn't follow through (or bother to edit), December 16, 2006
I am a 30-year-old, recently married, professional woman who would like to start a family. The topic of this book resonated with me, and I was eager for its arrival on my doorstep. The book had tremendous value to me for one reason: I am direly in need of female mentors who have successfully juggled a meaningful career with family, and the authors provide a well-diversified sampling of intelligent women's viewpoints in the "New Girls' Club" section. However, from the very first page, I was disappointed in the level of writing. Not only did the authors resort to pop psychology and assumptive thinking (ie, that every woman in our generation is involved in the same mess for the same reasons); they also did not follow through with the title of the book. The book trails off with a third-party voice, and there is no strong author's conclusion at the end. I was left wondering, "'Midlife Crisis at 30--and what to do about it': what should I do about it?" I got the impression that the women were trying to squeeze the book in with their high-profile jobs, their marriage and/or boyfriend, and Kerry's pregnancy (at one point, as if the book is their personal journal, they mention that "as we write, Kerry is popping prenatal vitamins.")
My biggest problem with the book is the lack of editorial review. Within the first page alone, there are three glaring grammatical or stylistic errors. Not only was the book filled with grade school English class mistakes, but the general editing for the purpose of organizing the general ideas could have been much more effective. Chapters end quickly and irresolutely without drawing necessary conclusions. The authors illustrate their ideas with personal and anecdotes and vignettes from colleagues rather than carefully supported research or diversified experiences. Even their citations contain ridiculous errors: "...a 40-year-old college-educated single woman in her thirties is more likely to be killed by terrorists than to get married."
The authors' style of writing comes across as juvenile and draft-like. Constant dashes and ellipses dot the pages: "...there is no one official path to happiness--and for many modern women, it's okay to take the long road home." Modern pop lingo and words connected with slashes are abundant, when plain English would be more effective: "Her work/life/balance could have done the job--"
The authors come across as vivacious, interesting women; it would be fun to be seated next to one of them at a dinner party. Yet if I invest money and many hours in a book, I expect that it will be well organized, well researched, and certainly well edited. Each female generation comes of age within its challenging zeitgeist, and I appreciate that the authors have chosen to help portray that of Generation X/Y. If Barbara Ehrenreich, Naomi Wolf, Gloria Steinem, Anna Quindlen, Ann Crittenden, and countless other highly educated and well spoken thinkers can organize their modern ideas within an intelligent format, I hope that my generation will take the time and energy to present their own theories to the public with equally spirited, compassionate, and articulate integrity.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
The problem isn't you, April 14, 2006
Informative and insightful, this book looks at the culture of life choices of the women of Generations X and Y and concludes that a number of life stressors are now coinciding for women at age 30. Putting career first and putting off relationships later, women who believe that they could "have it all" --a meaningful relationship, family and challenging career begin running into the roadblocks of the glass ceiling and begin worrying about the husband and family that have never materialized all around age 30. Raised within the relatively gender-fair playing field of education, these women tend to internalize and ask what could be wrong with themselves, while missing the point that culturally there is still a long way to go for equal opportunity for women. The authors call to band together to change public policy is a good suggestion, but one which must overcome its cultural lethargy. Ultimately, the "dream team of mentors" which the authors assemble at the end of the book fails to personally inspire while detailing the life challenges of some successful women. The book however succeeds well overall in enlightening Generation X and Y women to the larger cultural problems that we are all facing together.
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