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Milton Berle's Private Joke File: Over 10,000 of His Best Gags, Anecdotes, and One-Liners Paperback – January 28, 1992
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Ha wasn't that a hoot? It's just one of the 10,000 jokes I now own because I picked up a copy of Milton Berle's Private Joke File.Berle, or Uncle Miltie, was a vaudeville performer before he jumped to TV in the 50's and many of his jokes go back that far. He also gives advice on how to stage a roast for charity, how to incorporate funny foreign accents into your act, and he actually has a small "chapter" on "K' words.(Words with the K sound are automatically funnier than words without it. Most of his ideas are 50+ years old, so they may seem a little, "anachronistic" On the other hand quite a few do work and Berle gives some interesting historical tidbits on working as a comic all those years ago. And it's always interesting to see what people laughed at back in the day.But here, see for yourself:
A recession is when you have to tighten your belt. A depression i swhen you have no belt.
From behind, she looks like 2 puppies fighting.
He's so fat that every time he goes thru a turnstile, he has to make 3 trips!
He's so fat he got on a rowing machine last night and it sank!
My wife and I have a waterbed. She calls it the Dead Sea.
A neurotic builds castles in the air. A psychotic lives in the castle. A psychiatrist collects rent from them both.
How can you tell if a turkey is a Republican? If it has two right wings!
She's so ritzy, the bags under her eyes are Gucci!
What acts like a male rock star,looks like a male rock star and talks like a male rock star?....A female rock star!
He's so rich if you asked for a salad at his house they served you shredded money!
They now have a teenager doll.Read more ›
And a lot of them not very funny.
And some of them sort of funny.
And some very funny.
Jokes, anecdotes, puns, little stories. The whole bag.
But of course without the intonation, and the look, and all the million and one tricks that Milty made us laugh with.
The king of the comedians.
One little story tells here about Milty and his famous show- business mother who pushed him everywhere. He was what he had to be. If they needed an Italian kid he did an Italian accent. If they needed an Irish kid he did that . One time an agent came and said to the mother that they needed a dog in a certain show. She immediately turned to her son and said ' Bark'.
And of course he did , the star of the Texaco Theatre who in television's first years on Tuesday nights made America look at the little box and laugh.
This book should be in the library not only of those who love and practice humor, but in the library of those nostalgic for the America of another time.
Uncle Milty lived to about ninety or so before he said good- bye. Of them all the only one who was still able to thank him for the memories was Bob Hope who made it I believe to one- hundred.
What an America it was. And it's gone.
I have used many of these jokes in writing and speaking and highly recommend this as perhaps the funniest large-volume jokebook.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
I bought this as a gift for my dad. He's got a dirtier sense of humor and needed some clean jokes to add to his ever growing list. He seems to be happy with the purchase.Published 2 months ago by Kyle B
He's a riot. I'm older, so I remember him from his early times in TV. The jokes are timeless. It's best read in small increments, not as a novel. Read morePublished 17 months ago by Dr Howard Grindlinger
hold on to these gems AS THEY DONT TELL JOKES LIKE THIS STUFF ANYMORE, SOME WILL SAY THAT GOOD BUT NOT ME ,Published 20 months ago by JoeP
Those who remember and enjoyed Milton Berle on TV decades ago will very much appreciate this collection of his great material.Published 21 months ago by Earle Williams
There is maybe one usable joke every five pages, on average. It isn't even just that they are dated. Read morePublished on August 9, 2013 by Michael J. Connell