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Mindful Loving: 10 Practices for Creating Deeper Connections Paperback – March 8, 2004


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Soul Shifts
There are pivotal moments in the lives of all seekers when we realize that we’ve been traveling on our path of growth toward happiness and ful­fillment, but, simply put, we want to go faster.
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 285 pages
  • Publisher: Gotham (March 8, 2004)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1592400612
  • ISBN-13: 978-1592400614
  • Product Dimensions: 5.2 x 0.8 x 8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #169,239 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Psychologist Grayson here explains why happiness in relationships lies in the ability of the participants to engage in a spiritual marriage, a theory he established in The New Physics of Love, the audio series on which this book is based. During a lecture Grayson attended on the parallels between new physics and ancient mystical thought, he became convinced that mind, energy and matter intimately connect all humans and all living beings together-a concept he deemed to have great consequence for improving relationships. Most marriages are ego-based and characterized by partners who want gratification, pleasure and security from each other, he says; if our desires are not met, we attempt to change our partner's behavior, which can create a downward spiral of disappointment and dissatisfaction. Grayson believes that conflict will dissipate and marriages will grow when husbands and wives surrender their egos. He describes, for example, how a wife's hostile fantasies towards her husband were a factor in his verbal abuse of her. When the woman began to think of her husband as the man she loved, he stopped attacking her with words. Put into practice, a spiritual marriage requires that unconditional love be given without the expectation of receiving anything in return. Included are ten ways to overcome obstacles to achieving a spiritual marriage, including how to change negative core beliefs, unblock the flow of love and meditate to quiet the mind. Although Grayson is obviously sincere, his focus on unconditional love even in the face of abuse may strike some as unrealistic.
Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Review

"Grayson has integrated psychology, spirituality, and the new physics into concrete theory and practice that sheds light on how couples make themselves miserable and how, by transforming their thoughts, they can achieve mutual joy. I highly recommend it."
Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., author of Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples


Mindful Loving is a powerfully insightful book on relationships that will bring new understanding to those who face relationship problems. -- Gerald G. Jampolsky, author of Forgiveness: The Greatest Healer of All and Love is Letting Go of Fear

Customer Reviews

Very helpful, very inspiring, very philosophical.
gumnut
After reading this book -- I was able to come to peace with my divorce and its practices so helped me in my approach to my next relationship.
Dan Nitro Clark
A tremendous gift to those seeking true, spiritual and meaningful connections with those they love.
Sisterfire

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

54 of 57 people found the following review helpful By BigHeart on June 2, 2003
Format: Hardcover
Finally a book about how to be love rather than how to get love! Oh the difference. Instead of looking to significant others to make us feel complete, whole, and happy, we learn how to do this by ourselves for ourselves. 10 powerful ideas for becoming a more loving being are offered. Even more importantly, Mindful Loving teaches how to respond to life's challenges by thinking in a different way. This sounds like a small shift, but it's a major change in life perception.
Because spirituality and psychotherapy are perfectly blended, Mindful Loving should be required reading for every psychotherapist, every psychologist, every minister, or for anyone involved in talk therapy of any kind. Other books tend to use spirituality to support psychology, where spiritual principles are adapted, modified, or eliminated to make the point. This book is the other way around where psychology supports spirituality. The uncompromising nature of Mindful Loving makes it refreshing to read.
The only caution is that this is a very intellectual and heavy book which may not appeal to all. Also, Grayson could not resist including the predictable list of how love "should be." All in all, however, Mindful Loving is an excellent explanation of love with something of use for everyone. This book is rated 8 on a scale of 1 (low) to 10 (high) by the spiritual reviewer. This unusually high rating designates Mindful Loving as "a classic."
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15 of 17 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on July 4, 2004
Format: Paperback
I am a divorcee who is presently working on a new relationship. I recently picked up this book and finally began understanding why I had such difficulties in my former marriage and how I can change myself to develop a deeper meaningful relationship with my partner. Until reading this book, I only saw what was on the surface and was blind to all of the hidden feelings, insecurities and intentions that we both had. After reading this book as well as another really fantastic book called "The Ever-Transcending Spirit" by Toru Sato, I finally am beginning to see these things. They are both terrific books! I am extremely thankful to these authors who have helped me see myself and the world so much clearer than before. I will try to use this new knowledge to grow together with my new partner in a positive way. Thank you!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Neil Cowley on January 25, 2012
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
- the excercises included at the end of each chaper are not included in the kindle edition :(

The meditation exercises and clearly thought out processes for dividing false love and empowering love are priceless - get this book.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Amazon Customer on February 26, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition
As a recovered catholic I've struggled most of my life with a spiritual gap. I've encountered mindfulness in my Zen Buddhism exposure but this book emphasizes a perspective I have not (or was not ready) to grasp, that of the "True Self". And that the "medieval god of a flat earth" concept has been blocking my spiritual growth. I've got so much more to learn but now I feel that by looking inside myself I will find many more answers than by searching on the outside.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Mark R. Horne on September 19, 2006
Format: Paperback
Henry Grayson's ideas were new to me when I read his book. I learned to hold new expectations of my relationships and marriage, learned a deeper understanding of where love comes from, and learned to seek personal responsibility for my own emotions. Reading this book improved every relationship in my life. Highly, highly recommended for those considering marriage or already in one - blissful or rocky.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By J. Schiller on December 21, 2011
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This is the best book I've come by to integrate mindfulness, personal responsibility and internal perspective. It gives clear explanations and tools to implement necessary shifts in thought processes. I've read numerous relationship books and spirituality books, and have found this book to amazingly bring it all together. It's a must read!
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Bloomingrose on September 25, 2009
Format: Paperback
I want to personally thank the author for writing this book. It discusses a spiritual path that is the most rewarding but difficult and wrought with perils: having conscious human relationships. This book shows the best examples of how our relationships are mirrors of our own processes that I have read.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By butter on April 21, 2011
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This is an incredible book. I would recommend it to anyone, and have bought it many times for friends. it is one of the most helpful books ive ever read, andthe book gives solid, techniques to aid in healing, such as EMDR. I also recommend his audio with Sounds True.
I also got it very quickly. My only complaint is, as far as I know they didnt say that someone underlined many portions of the book. That could be my fault, I didnt look closely, so that being said - I would not have bought it if I knew that, as I have a problem with it as I find someone elses notes and underlines distracting. I also wanted to give it as a gift, and now I cant. I did not see this mentioned. I cant afford to give "new" books as gifts, which is why i buy the used ones. so that part was very dissapointing. other than that -- quick service, great book, excellent price.
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More About the Author

Dr. Henry Grayson is on the cutting edge of mind/body/spirit psychology. The founder of the National Institute for the Psychotherapies in New York City, Dr. Grayson was a Protestant minister before receiving his Ph.D. in psychology from Boston University and post-doctoral certification in psychoanalysis from the Postgraduate Center for Mental Health. This rich background led him to his work in spiritually based, mind body energy psychology and his creation of Synergetic Therapy.

He is the Founder and Chairman Emeritus of the Board of Trustees of the National Institute for the Psychotherapies in New York; the Founder and Director of the Institute for Spirituality, Science and Psychotherapy; and continues to appear in numerous documentaries and PBS specials. He has studied neuropsychology, the major psychotherapies, the new power therapies, quantum physics and Eastern and Western spiritual philosophies. He is the author of Use Your Body to Heal Your Mind: Revolutionary Methods to Release All Barriers to Health, Healing and Happiness, Mindful Loving: 10 Practices for Creating Deeper Connections and the best selling CD Audio Series for Sounds True,The New Physics of Love: The Power of Mind & Spirit in Relationships. His academic titles include Three Psychotherapies: A Clinical Comparison, Short Term Approaches to Psychotherapy, and Changing Approaches To The Psychotherapies. In addition, he is the co-chairman of the PTSD division of the Stand Up For Your Troops Foundation.

Dr. Grayson's professional affiliations include: Fellow of the American Group Psychotherapy Association, Diplomat of the American Board of Professional Psychology; member of the American Psychological Association, The New York State Psychological Association, The Connecticut Psychological Association, The Association for Transpersonal Psychology, The Institute of Noetic Sciences, The Society for the Scientific Study of Subtle Energies Medicine, EMDR International Association, a former Board Member of the Eastern Group Psychotherapy Society, and is the Founder and Past President of the Association for Spirituality and Psychotherapy. Diplomat of The Association for Comprehensive Energy Psychology.

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Mindful Loving: 10 Practices for Creating Deeper Connections
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