Customer Reviews

The Minds of Boys: Saving Our Sons From Falling Behind in School and Life

5 star:		(29)
4 star:		(7)
3 star:		(3)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

When my son was just born, THE WONDER OF BOYS came out. I'm an engineer who also loves being a mother, but I sort of think like a guy. So I thought, "I understand guys--raising a son won't be tough." It has been tough, indeed. There was so much I, who had no brothers, just didn't get about boys. Michael Gurian's very scientific but very empathic approach to kids really helped me ten years ago.

Then, a few days ago, I got THE MINDS OF BOYS. Now Gurian, teaming up with educator Kathy Stevens, has written the sequel. This one is all about how to help boys in school. It comes none too soon for me. My son is going into fifth grade and needs help especially with motivation. Thank you, Michael and Kathy, for your two chapters on how to motivate our sons.

Truthfully, I think it's about time someone wrote this book. There's been a lot of emphasis on girls in school, and I'm glad of it, but I'm seeing a lot of boys around me, my son's friends, who are having trouble focusing in school. This new book will help a lot of us moms (and dads).

Lastly, I really like the emphasis in the book on getting everyone involved in a kid's education--grandparents, neighbors, friends. This is important for all kids, boys and girls.

Gurian and Stevens use scientific research to diagnose what every alert parent and educator has been thinking for over a century--boys' brains and bodies were NOT made for the modern western educational system. Our system forces boys to be taught in sedentary settings, using learning styles unfit for their masculine minds.

Gurian and Stevens begin by documenting the boys' crisis in education. Such research, though not novel, when pulled together like this, rattles our cages enough to gain and keep our attention.

However, the true strength of "The Minds of Boys" is its thorough, detailed, specific, field-tested solutions. In area after area, "Saving Our Sons from Falling Behind in School and Life" empowers parents to equip their sons to overcome the many obstacles that they face in the school setting.

One can only hope that educators themselves will read and heed the advice of Gurian and Stevens. If they do, then the next hundred years could produce a much more boy-friendly educational system.

Reviewer: Bob Kellemen, Ph.D., is the author of "Soul Physicians," "Spiritual Friends," and the forthcoming, "Beyond the Suffering."

The library at the college where I work puts out a list of new books they have purchased in our area once per month, and this book was on the psychology list back in January. I thought it looked interesting and picked it up then, thinking it might have some good things to say about a book I'm writing about men and depression. I finally picked it up and started reading it last week, and finished it in less than a week. I really enjoyed the authors' styles of writing which made some of the technical information more accessible and easier to understand, which to me means it would be a great resource for students studying education and for parents of boys of all ages.
If it's so great, what's it about, you ask? A lot actually. The first thing that they discussed that caught my eye was the idea that for the past few years we've focused on girls and how to educate them better, and now the authors think it's time we focused on boys who were not doing well in school. It's not that we're helping girls to the detriment of boys, but now that we've helped girls it's time to focus on boy education. They describe some of their negative experiences with the education system, and it makes me realize that the things I've heard from guys about school all my life weren't just "coming from my friends." I always assumed I hung out with the non-academic guys or the extremely smart guys who were just turned off by education. Come to find out there are a lot of boys (and future men) who were turned off to education by our educational system's lack of teaching them in a way that they can learn. As Gurian writes in another one of his books, Boys and Girls Learn Differently! Gurian and Stevens describe the brain differences between boys and girls (and men and women) that cause these differences in learning styles, and I think that that chapter is probably one of the most important ones in the book. I honestly don't see how college programs that are educating future teachers can NOT cover this stuff.
A second thing that makes this book so interesting to me was that they talked about behaviors boys demonstrate in learning environments and where they come from in the brain. The research is telling us that that fidgety, always-have-to-be-moving, can't sit still to save his life 6-year-old that I always tell to sit down when I'm trying to work with him actually CAN be moving and still learn, and in fact, SHOULD be moving in order to learn better. The authors describe "boy energy" and how many parents and teachers don't understand it, and they may thus assume their child has ADD or ADHD. That was another very interesting section of the book - there was a discussion of using brain scans (PET and SPECT) to diagnose brain anomalies such as ADD and ADHD. Ever since the research came out showing that some parts of the brain are different in kids with attention disorders I've wondered why we weren't using that information to diagnose, and now the Amen Clinics that the authors describe are doing this.
Overall I was highly impressed by this book, and it really has excited me to try out some research on my college students in terms of men and learning in the college environment using some of the suggestions they give for grade school education. If you are going to be a teacher, or you're a parent that has a boy who is school age, you should definitely read this book. I think that you'll easily recognize a good number of your students or your child's behaviors here, and reading this will give you a better understanding of how they think and where the behaviors come from.

We have five children with three boys. All three have had problems ever since kindergarten. They are all now in middle school. Everything in subjects changes in middle school dividing the instruction among different teachers. It is highly more difficult as a child struggles with coping with the personality of each teacher and adapting to the individual instructional expectations in middle school.

This alone is a challenge. If you have boys and they have ADHD or ADD, not only will the children become frustrated, but so do the parents as will the teachers.

We were at our wit's end before our physican recommended The Mind of Boys. It made perfect sense to us as parents as we read things we had always noticed in our three boys.

With book in tow, we set up an appointment with the school counselor of each boy. Each one had a different counselor leading us to have to meet with them more than once. Stress among our family, friends and relatives was at an all time high. After many conferences with teachers and doctors, things seem to be coming together for the first time since I can remember.

The Minds of Boys has changed our life and we highly recommend it to any parent who has boys, to every teacher who teaches boys and to each counselor in every school district. If we can just save one family of having to go through what we did, it will be worth our testimonial.

When we thought we might never have a normal family life, this book helped us to snap out of it and helped us to make sense of the incredible mess we demonstrated among ourselves in our personal relationship with our boys.

It can change your life for the better. While our household is calmer, we know that there will still be highs and lows but Michael Gurian has made a significant difference in our lives. Other parenting books which have helped our family as a whole are, Your Gifted Child, No More Misbehavin' and Mommy CEO. These are books that out of all the ones we have read, have impacted our lives as a parent, mom and dad. Thank you so very much to all of these amazing authors. Today's parents and today's kids have to work together as a team with teachers and the school system for the very best results for each child.

I still believe in one important thing, when you think you know better than others, in regards to your children, never give up on your gut feelings, even if it means taking on teachers, doctors and a whole school system...parents know their kids better than anyone else can. You may not be able to convince others right away, but never giving up will lead to winning the battle.

More informative than 'Boys and Girls Learn Differently,' 'The Minds of Boys' is a fascinating look into the specific reasons why boys are doing so poorly in school nowadays. Very, very awful if you did not know - Boys are the overwhelming majority of special education students, are more likely to drop out, and are much less likely to attend college.

Gurian's strategies to help come off as a bit vague - few concrete solutions are offered. As a teacher, I want to know what a 'boy-friendly' classroom looks like. Precious few good examples are provided.

Lacks the hard edge, though - read as a companion to Christina Hoff Sommers 'the War Against Boys'.

I give this one a grade of A-.

Leave it to Michael Gurian to be consistent with his wisdom and insights. I'm the mother of a wonderful and sensitive son, but I didn't grow up with brothers or present father figures--so I need all the help I can get. THE WONDER OF BOYS has helped me at home; now THE MINDS OF BOYS will help me help him at school. The research is solid but his voice is friendly and accessible. Thank you, Mr. Gurian, for giving a three-dimensional voice to our sons who are at risk for being wrongly pigeon-holed. Everyone who loves the mystery and marvel of boys should read this.

This is a terrific and unique resource for parents and boys alike. Especially for the young man who's diagnosed with borderline or actual ADD or ADHD, there are insights and solutions here that will make a real diffence in their lives.

As a mother of a young boy(5) who is experiencing several of the symptoms described in the book (disliking school, lack of participation, academic difficulties, occasional disruptive behavior, etc), this book has helped me, if nothing else, to be more empathetic, understanding and patient towards him. This in itself is worth a solid recommendation for the book. Our sons need love, support and understanding, despite the aggravation that their behaviour sometimes causes. In a world where teachers and doctors are quick to diagnose ADHD and prescribe drugs, this book also equipped me to have better discussions with doctors and teachers. It does not provide a quick fix, but strong support along the journey.

I would highly recommend this book to any parent of a boy. I know that this is a broad, sweeping statement, and that not all parents will face the challenges, which this book highlights, however, I was relieved to discover in reading this book that I am not alone. I was heartbroken, when at three, my son was transitioned into a class of four and five-year-old children without any of his peers. There, a Pre-K teacher, told him that he was `stupid' and `didn't listen' because he could not sit still or write his letters, and that he had ADD. Her dissatisfaction with him eventually escalated until she physically hit my son. He was traumatized by this incident. I subsequently removed him from this school. However, when I saw the news program featuring the Michael Gurian Institute and this book, I tried to get it from Barnes & Nobles and Borders only to discover it was sold out. I then ordered it from Amazon and have not been able to put it down. It has given me the tools to mitigate successfully potential negative interactions with his current teachers and caregivers, and to build bridges that celebrate his uniqueness as a young boy entering the educational arena. A Must Have!!

When one of my twins was tested and tested and tested, and then told he wasn't "quite" ADHD, I got more advice than I could even begin to use. Most of it was well-meaning, but wrong. This book, though, spells out how to keep a support system going without exhausting yourself, and my son will benefit greatly from it.

Bravo!