Customer Reviews

Miss Manners on Weddings

5 star:		(7)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

This is not a how to plan a wedding primer, so don't buy this if you're looking for one. It is a rather entertaining series of mini-essays attempting to put the elaborate, extravagant, and expensive spectacles that weddings are becoming into a reasonable perspective. I read it while engaged and found the author's perspective on what is and is not important a helpful reminder. For example: the wedding day is not all about the bride; the wedding is not a fundraiser; the wedding is not a time for networking; the wedding is not for the entertainment of all present, but a ceremony uniting two people in marriage; weddings should be in good taste, etc. Seemingly obvious points, but yet, many involved seem to miss them!

However, if you're going to plan a large wedding, a how to guide is actually much more useful. And if you're dealing with horrid fights with your family or your in laws, or both, no book can help you--unfortunate as that may be!

Miss Manners is as wise and witty as ever. However, what the teeny print on the bottom of the front cover says is that this book was previously published under a different title (Painfully Proper Weddings). This volume does take a somewhat scattershot approach, so that people looking for precise pointers on every aspect of a wedding may be disappointed. However, she does provide a few general guidelines of good sensible advice: a religious wedding is a ceremony, not a show; weddings in general should not be seen as opportunities for revenge, egotistical posturing, or profiteering, but rather as joyful events to join families together.

I adore Miss Manners' witty, dry writing style. There's plenty of that here, along with her decidedly staid opinions -- no response cards, please; don't you ever dare make guests pay for a drink; and no, monkeys aren't welcome at the ceremony.

You will certainly learn plenty here (and laugh out loud more than a few times), but this isn't a start-to-finish, hold-your-hand book. I would suggest reading this one for its entertainment value and Miss Manners' solid, irreproachable suggestions. Supplement it with another book such as "The Everything Wedding Etiquette Book" for a more complete primer.

...because maybe now I can get my much-traveled copy back.

If you'd like to get married with some dignity, rather than make an idiot of yourself, this is your guide.

For those of you who don't want a cookie-cutter experience. All of Miss Manners' advice is good; though you must be brave to take it!

You don't need any wedding planning books if you accept the wedding as a solemn ceremony with a party to follow. Miss Manners reminds you of this throughout the book.

Weddings are best if most ideas are yours and not bought off a magazine rack.

I bought this book for my father, who is about to be remarried. The lessons of the book are mainly concerned with the weddings of more idealistic, first-time couples with larger weddings in mind, but since my dad used to read "Miss Manner's Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior" to us as kids (for humor more than etiquette), I thought it would be a fun gift. You'll have a good laugh with this book even if you are just planning to attend a wedding, or have ever attended one. As for engaged couples and their parents and other close relatives, this book is a practical guide to keeping your head on your shoulders and creating a beautiful, wonderful wedding without ruining relationships or creating such high expectations that the ensuing marriage is lackluster. Miss Manners states in her introduction that the book is not intended for brides, since they already have enough to worry about, but if you are a bride-to-be and have not yet really entered the fray of wedding planners and bridal showers, and can take some constructive criticism, it wouldn't hurt to check this book out. The question and answer inserts between Miss Manners and her "gentle readers" are particularly illuminating, and Martin (Miss Manners) includes proper invitation examples and other such practical material. Most of all, Miss Manner's wit and sense of etiquette based on human decency rather than petty formal tradition are refreshing and make the even the sterner of her lessons and warnings easy to swallow...if you can stop chuckling.

Miss Manners is the authority on correctness, and this charming well written book will keep a bride from making a fool of herself, and doing "whatever" in times when people who hawk sample wedding dresses over the internet get TV bookings that call them "experts."

There is only one expert and one correct way of being wed, and this book will provide the perfect guide.

This is my standard gift to brides-to-be, and it's been responsible for amicably settling a couple of Bridezilla-type disagreements in my own family. How valuable it is to be able to refer to the impeccably correct Miss Manners when handling such behavioral land mines as the importance of prompt thank-you notes, issues of non responsive guests, children at reception or financing a wedding and reception!

Impending marriage ceremonies are incredibly stressful on families and friends of the couple, and this book breaks down each issue with laser precision. It's not a how-to, but rather a why-it's-important-to, and if read and understood, the Big Day will arrive with everyone involved on good terms. This is MUCH more important than color schemes, themes and favors, which nobody will remember anyway.

There are many wedding books that will tell you how to make a bouquet out of Kleenex, or provide a planning calendar, but I know of no others that deal with the delicate political balance in families that is required to navigate a successful wedding day. One of the most valuable points Miss Manners makes is that the reception is a party hosted by people other than the couple, and those people are in charge. That little pearl of perspective alone, with its accompanying advice is worth the price of the book! Highly, highly recommended!

I love Miss Manners. In fact, I love etiquette books, so if you don't, you probably want a different review---I even read Emily Post's book online at Project Gutenberg. This one was a lot of fun, and my maid of honor borrowed it because I seemed to be enjoying reading it so much.

It's not a book of advice on how to plan your wedding so much as it is practical, down to earth advice on how to continue being the upright, kind, pleasant person that your future spouse and your friends liked before you became a bride. Advice like invite the people you want to have celebrate with you, and then figure out what you can afford to feed them. Cake and punch in the church basement are acceptable if that means you can invite all 300 of your mother's cousins(paraphrased).

Buy or borrow and enjoy!

I found Miss Manners to uppity, better-than-thou attitude nauseating. Her approach to wedding ettiquette is mainly filled with the question-answer tidbits that one can find in the newspaper and very rarely apply to you. I did not find this book useful. If you want a wedding ettiquette resource, go for Emily Post.