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I Miss You: A First Look at Death (First Look at Books) [Paperback]

Pat Thomas , Leslie Harker
4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (53 customer reviews)

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Book Description

January 1, 2001 4 and up First Look at Books780L (What's this?)
When a close friend or family member dies, it can be difficult for children to express their feelings. This book helps boys and girls understand that death is a natural complement to life, and that grief and a sense of loss are normal feelings for them to have following a loved one's death. Titles in this sensitively presented series explore the dynamics of various relationships experienced by children of preschool through early school age. Kids are encouraged to understand personal feelings and social problems as a first step in dealing with them. Written by psychotherapist and counselor Pat Thomas, these books promote positive interaction among children, parents, and teachers. The story lines are simple and direct--easily accessible to younger children. There are full-color illustrations on every page.

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I Miss You: A First Look at Death (First Look at Books) + The Invisible String
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Product Details

  • Age Range: 4 and up
  • Paperback: 32 pages
  • Publisher: Barron's Educational Series; 1 edition (January 1, 2001)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 9780764117640
  • ISBN-13: 978-0764117640
  • ASIN: 0764117645
  • Product Dimensions: 9.5 x 0.2 x 8.4 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (53 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #4,855 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Pat is a trained psychotherapist, naturopath and journalist. After working as a journalist and broadcaster in the USA, she now works in the field of child development and writes for various publications including 'Practical Parenting'.

Customer Reviews

I bought this book for my 5 year old when his grandmother died. Tanya  |  9 reviewers made a similar statement
This is a good one if someone close to the child has died. info shopper  |  2 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
201 of 208 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars This is the book I've been looking for December 7, 2005
Format:Paperback
I am the parent of a 4 year old child. Her preschool teacher, who was also our family babysitter, just passed away very unexpectedly from cardiac arrest (at a young age). As we have a very open-minded spirituality in our home, we wanted to find a book that would help our daughter understand death and the feelings she is having, without any particular religious slant.

This book explains in very gentle, simple terms what happens when a person dies (they no longer eat or breathe, etc.), and explains that it is a part of the natural process of all living things. It talks about the different feelings that we have, including that we might feel bad about things that we did, or didn't do, but that it is not our fault that the person died. It talks about how sometimes people die when they are very old, or when they are very sick, or when something tragic happens. As for addressing "afterlife", it provides the perspective that we don't really know what happens, but that most cultures have some type of belief that the soul--the part of a person that we love--goes on to be with other souls that have already died, kind of like rain drops joining the ocean.

I can't imagine anything about this book that I would want to be done differently. It is beautifully written, beautifully illustrated, and exactly what I was hoping to find to help my child during this difficult time.
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65 of 69 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Clear and sensitive at the same time July 8, 2005
By BG
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
This books gives a clear and simple explanation about death without complicated religious concepts about heaven or god. I only regret that the author did not go a little bit further by mentioning something about cremation as an alternative to the burial and by not using the classical old figure of the person who died. I am looking for ways to explain to a 5 year old girl from a non religious family what happened to her young mother who died and was cremated. This book helped a lot more than others and I highly recommend it. I also recommend reading "When Charlotte Mom's Died" from Cornelia Spelman and wish I could find more work done for these boys and girls who loose relatively young people and not only their grandparents.
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77 of 83 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Helps young children deal with loss January 20, 2006
Format:Paperback
We have added this book to our short-list collection of books dealing with loss. It is an excellent secular discussion about dying. In it the author states, "Death is a natural part of life. All living things grow, change and eventually die." On the page where this text appears is a dying tree; on the facing page is a fallen bird. When the book reaches human loss, there's a question at the bottom of the page designed to help adults guide a child in a brief discussion by asking, "What about you? Has anyone you know died? How did they die?"

This book helps children (and adults, too) deal with the loss of loved ones, its accompanying grief, and even guilt. Likening one's soul to a raindrop that joins other raindrops in the ocean is brilliant! At the end of the book is a section on how to use the book; a short glossary (funeral, soul, and grief) which could've been expanded to include words like "culture," "beliefs", "ceremony"; further reading choices; and a paragraph on resources for grief support. I liked the fact that author Thomas mentions that people of different cultures have some beliefs that are the same and some that are different when it comes to what happens after someone dies. Lesley Harker's illustrations are lovely and comforting.

A must for every family's home library.

Carolyn Rowe Hill
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellant Product
We purchased this for our grandaughter and turned out to be very rewarding for her. Would recoomend the purchase of this product to others.
Published 23 days ago by Briskaw
4.0 out of 5 stars Bad words for someone
I THINK THAT THE BOOK I MISS YOU might be a hard to read for a person or 2 or 3
Published 1 month ago by Sara Briggs
4.0 out of 5 stars Good Book
Very nice book. good for kids that are trying to work through death. Very Sweet and it helped us too
Published 3 months ago by Lily Ly Barry
2.0 out of 5 stars Ok I guess
I was not impressed. Could have been better. Very short not worth the money. Would not buy again or recommend.
Published 3 months ago by Annabelle Porter
5.0 out of 5 stars love this book
purchsaed for my daughter when my grandmother passed and it is a great explanation of how feelings/memories are normal and what kids can do about them
Published 4 months ago by susanssmith
3.0 out of 5 stars I MISS YOU
Again, good book, but not based on our faith and to me that is a requirement when trying to come to grips or explain loss. Both books danced around that too much!
Published 4 months ago by Danette Williams
5.0 out of 5 stars Good read
Shows a small child that things are ok when someone dies and makes them feel safe. Great for a four year old.
Published 4 months ago by candyo
5.0 out of 5 stars "I Miss You: A First Look At Death" By Pat Thomas
I purchased this book to send to the Sandy Hook Elementary School, (For Use In Their Library Or Counseling Office): 12 Dickenson Drive, Sandy Hook, CT 06482, My Prayers will also... Read more
Published 5 months ago by YA YA Granny
5.0 out of 5 stars Great for Families
We bought these for our patients in the office that I work at. It has been a great asset for our practice!!
Published 6 months ago by Kristi Wells
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent for verbal pre-schooler and older
I ordered 5 different books dealing with death for pre-schoolers. This is a good one if someone close to the child has died. Read more
Published 11 months ago by info shopper
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Just a thought, but...
I am looking for a book written for a 4 year old's level of comprehension regarding the sudden death of a mother. So many books deal with grandparents and the normalcy of life and death at an old age. I am not able to find things that are more specific to one's loss of a mother as a two year... Read more
May 15, 2009 by Linnea R. Helle |  See all 2 posts
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