Customer Reviews

Mistress Ruby Ties It Together: A Dominatrix Takes On Sex, Power, and the Secret Lives of Upstanding Citizens

5 star:		(9)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(4)

 

 

Robin Shamburg (f/k/a "Mistress Ruby") presents this book based on the essays she wrote for New York Press while she was a professional dominatrix in New York City in the mid-90s. Ms. Shamburg's writing style is witty, and she has a talent for bringing to light humorous anecdotes that shed some light on this otherwise mysterious line of work. The book is an easy and enjoyable read.

The book could have been better had Ms. Shamburg spent more time describing her feelings to the reader -- ie, what did it feel like to do the things that she did to her clients during her time in the dungeon? One gets the impression that it was largely a job for Ms. Shamburg, but it would have been a much more riveting book had the reader been allowed to understand what Ms. Shamburg really felt like when she was brandishing the whip over a client.

One final word -- this is not a book for those who are really into the BDSM lifestyle. Ms. Shamburg was a professional dominatrix for two years, but is not a lifestyle BDSM enthusiast or a natural S&M player -- for her, it was an interesting interlude in her life, and that is the vein in which this book must be read. Those who are interested in exploring the mind of a truly dominant personality -- a lifestyle Domme -- should look elsewhere. Having said that, this book does offer insights into the lifestyle of most of the professional Mistresses out there, who are neither lifestyle BDSMers or natural Dommes, but rather regular folks who have a somewhat unique line of work -- and for that reason, it is worthwhile reading.

As a working Domme, I was thrilled to discover this book and this writer, Robin Shamburg. She (brilliantly) puts into words so many of the thoughts and feelings I have had about our profession, in a style that is smart, generous and funny as hell. Mistresses are often stereotyped as meanspirited man-haters (if you read other comments by so-called "dommes" you would see why this is so...ladies your jealousy is showing!) Instead Ms. Schamburg shows the "human" side of human deviation. Also, she is refreshingly honest about what it's like to be in your 20's trying to find your way in the world, while maintaining your integrity--something she has obviously managed to do! All of my friends (Dommes and non-Dommes) are crazy about this book...Mistress Ruby come and do a reading in SF real soon!

I picked up this book thinking it would be an insider's look at the s&m world and New York City. I learned a lot about this "scene" and the people in it, but it was so much more. Shamburg's unique insights on life, love, family and our culture in general were thought-provoking and even heartbreaking at times. But they were also laugh-out-loud funny. I have a feeling that this author will bring her grace and energy to any subject she decides to write about, and I can't wait to see what she does next!

This is one the funniest books I've ever read. Shamburg's world is outlandish, yet her insights into human nature and modern culture make it uncannily familiar and funny. She manages to resist trite analysis and give a humorous, touching and varied yarn. It's one of the most original books I've read in a while - this book is about S&M like The Catcher in the Rye is about college prep.

You won't be able to put it down.

This book was very disappointing. The title and description on the back cover implied that it would be entertaining or at least thought provoking, but it was surprisingly boring. In case you are tempted to read this book, I will now debunk each myth surrounding this book that you might believe before reading it:

"This book will provide a glimpse into a dark yet fascinating and secret world" - False! If you have seen any episodes of HBO's Real Sex television program then you already know the interests of the author's clients; it is unlikely you will learn anything new here.

"This book will be my guide to working off the grid as a dominatrix" - No! Though she does give some tips, they are pretty basic (shoes and costumes are important, etc.)

"This book will introduce me to a new sex-positive, strong female author, a la Susie Bright or Tristen Taormino" - Maybe - Shamburg has potential to be in that league of writers, but it is not realized in this book. I say this because the best essays are those that are not related to her work as a dominatrix; my favorite described complications caused by an IUD. In it she makes the case that women are subjected to birth control medications and devices with side effects which would not be considered acceptable in a product for the general population, or for non-family planning use. Her personal experience shows the physical and emotional consequences of one of these products.

Most of these essays were originally written for a New York Press column, so perhaps that is why they were less edgy than I had expected. Perhaps her next book will be better.

Hilarious! Ms. Shamburg gives an outstanding look beyond the ropes and whips with incisive wit, and as a bonus throws in a slideshow of characters cleverly deconstructed to bring the reader in as well. I would never have expected to find myself thinking, "What a sweet, touching, and sad story" at the conclusion of a passage about an extensive session. Humorous and captivating, Ms. Ruby does indeed tie it all together.

What do you get when you cross a Catholic girl in a S&M dungeon? You get a great personal read that provides a healthy dose of humor and humanity towards an unsuspecting lot. Ms. Shamburg provides a unique tour of the underworld. Unlike other books of this topic, she becomes truly immersed in this culture, yet she keeps her wits enough to remain an observer. This book is witty, clever and approachable.

What a surprise! A friend recommended this book to me. At first, I thought it was going to be a gross sex book. But it is a heck of a lot more than that. Ms. Shamburg/Mistress Ruby is a smart, funny narrator. And a very talented writer, too. She somehow makes an alien subject, like the S&M business, very human to someone like me. I highly recommend this book.

A very disappointing book. Just a series of very short essays that do not tell you a lot about the business, merely hinting at some of the subjects, and showing Mz Shamburg's view of human nature, and the types of male that come to a dominatrix.I feel angry with her that she raises people's expectations that they are going to learn something and then there is nothing there. You feel as if you have been totally mislead.

Mz Shamburg wrote a series of articles for her local paper while she was acting as a dominatrix, and these may well be some or all of them, I have the feeling, reproduced in this book.

This book really has nothing to offer, and you would be best to save your money, and your disappointment and look for another book on the subject.

I'm sure Ms. Shamburg could hold my interest on any subject she chose to set her sights on; great sense of wordplay, her comedic timing is impeccible, this one really kept me rolling on the floor. I can't wait for this talented gal's next tome!