on May 13, 2013
I would like to start with: Each review here has it's merits. The good ones AND the bad ones. Prepare for a lot of text.
Firstly about the Author:
The book was written by Mark Manson. From what I gather, he's a traveler and has helped men around the globe with psychological, sexual and 'connection' issues with women. He owns and runs the website [...] and has a few products there.
The underlying theme I personally felt was about "investing in yourself" and being 'honest'. Having read a few PUA books, I felt this was its strong point. The book goes through a few parts, I may need to put a disclaimer here but this is how I felt about the book:
1. You are first introduced to the author and go through a few stories. One did hit the nail on the head with me. Mark then goes through different types of men and women.
2. You are then introduced to the theme of 'investing in yourself' - by investing in yourself, you reduce your 'neediness' and hence in turn become more 'attractive'. The principle is by actually having a voice, being who you want to be - you will actually find women who you want to be around, and more importantly you will most likely stand out around the crowd.
3. Mark then goes through his 3 key principles to achieve this: Honest Living, Honest Action and Honest Communication. By living who YOU want to be, by doing things that express who YOU are and by communicating YOUR honest thoughts - you will in turn become 'attractive'.
The parts that resonated with me:
1. Don't fear rejection
2. The more people you meet in life (through rejection) can only lead to meeting more people that you want to actually be with.
3. 'Demographics' - go to places where you will most likely find people you want to be with.
4. Express who you are and be proud of it.
5. Know your intentions - go out with those intentions.
6. You don't need openers. Just be yourself - 'My name is ______' works just fine.
7. Polarize people as soon as you can (shift them from attracted / not attracted )
There are other gems in the book I'm sure. After filtering in through all the reviews and comments I felt that I needed to write this review for those who are on the fence.
What to EXPECT:
1. A 'guide' to approaching women through honesty
2. A way to meet people you will most likely enjoy to be with in the future.
3. Build some confidence - get out there boy ;)
4. I want to state number 1 again: honesty is the key theme here.
5. Arguably a 'long term solution' & Arguably a more mature one?
What NOT to EXPECT:
1. This is not holy grail of knowledge, some of it is obvious. Hence why some reviews stated they knew most of this stuff. If you are living a great life (job etc), you are clear in your opinions and intentions, and you can communicate well don't bother with this book. You already got it =)
2. You won't get pick up lines, theories or openers.
3. You will not learn how to become the ultimate player - if that is your intention - there are great PUA options out there.
4. You will not attract ALL women - you will increase your chances to attract women that are more likely to be attracted in the 'real' you.
5. Numbers game. He hates it - so if you want to sleep with lots and lots of women and already doing so - read something else. Like I said - plenty of PUA books that tackle that.
Why is it NOT 5 stars?
1. You will note reviews on Amazon are very directed to how Mark has 'an agenda' in this book. I felt this agenda was that he is a bit 'against' Pick Up Artists (who don't use honesty - through tricks and things that clearly aren't who they are). Many times he will reflect on how PUAs don't use honesty and hence you won't find people for the long term. He did however state this in the book description. I don't like it when an author needs to constantly validate his method against PUAs. Just once is fine, not consistently. I also respect some PUAs I know and they are as direct as they can be - they aren't all about tricks.
2. My grammar is bad - but I am very certain this book was not proof read. It's messy and a bit over the place in terms of actual text. If you read the book, you will understand I am very strict to this sense only because he reads quite a bit of literature - he should also appreciate that paying readers expect a book that has been proof read.
3. It was not concise, when at many times it could have been. Again - I pitch this as a problem since he teaches us to be concise.
I personally liked the book - would of given it 3.5/5 (I'm going to round up here). I think its down to earth and very personal. You will see swear words, you will read Mark's stories, and you will find a gem that reminds you that you are unique. In a nutshell - it's a lifestyle book. I'm confident after reading this book I will not attract all the women in the world. I will however, find (possibly sleep with) more women that I personally want to be with. This is my personal goal though, and I prefer it this way.
Hope this helps.
on September 8, 2011
Personally I come from a background of having used Pickup Theory and Dating Advice to improve my dating life and I've done so successfully. Needless to say I know from personal experience what works and what turns out to be utter bull. I don't even have to read any of this stuff anymore, but from time to time, if a new book comes out I still enjoy reading. I do it to see what new stuff the book brings to the table (which is often not much new under the sun) and it always gives you a good flow of energy to continue to work on yourself and such.
But this book is something totally different that what I've seen coming across for a while.
I'd describe the book as: very good for an understanding of the basics of how attraction works, very mature, evolved and shedding a crystal clear light upon how dating and pickup advice affects men today. For example Mark clears up the issues around certain pickup advice being useless since a lot of it disregards differences in demographics, people, lifestyles, values etc (even though he sometimes uses extreme examples to get his point across, I still understand the essence of what he tries to convey). It will keep a lot of men from getting frustrated as a lot of beginners tend to implement pick up stuff on the wrong people in the wrong places with the wrong intentions and with wrong ways of measuring succes or growth and thus end up with more frustration than ever.
This book then continues by showing a quality roadmap to improve your lifestyle, you anxiety or social disconnectedness and then your communication skills. Mark gives theory and then practical guidelines It all comes together really good and is very coherent. His casual writing style makes the book very accessible for you to read. I flipped through the pages easily for hours since this was such a pleasant reading experience. Indeed there are a lot of grammar errors throughout the book but that doesn't outweigh the quality of advice given in Models for one bit.
Mark's book clears up a lot of issues men encounter when trying to get better with women (with quiet hilarious examples). It disenchants you from all kinds of pickup taboos. It's is very authentic and comes back to the undeniable truth that you have to develop yourself as a man in order to attract quality women. It is about honest communication and expressing yourself freely instead of using countless gimmicks (even though some of them are very effective and may work in the framework of honest communication, which he explains all throughout the book). Models provides a very good roadmap for developing both your inner gamer as well as cultivating specific necessary skills needed to get results with women quickly. I'd say try acting on the plan that he provides in here for a while before you consider taking a Pickup Bootcamp. I've been on two of those and even though I'm not gonna disclose wether you'll really benefit from those or not, I can say that you really want to find out if you need something like a bootcamp before spending so much money. I think this book if a great way to find this out for yourself.
I think this book is a GEM for any man dedicated to improving his love live. And I firmly believe this book will help out a lot of men who are already trying to implement dating advice but are struggling with it.
And I'm convinced that Mark's book brings a fresh breath of air in the evolution of pickup material and is FAR more realistic than a lot of advice out there.
I'm no friend nor contact of Mark, but when I appreciate something that I know works and has been put together with heart, authentic intentions and real expertise, then I support it so that it can do a lot of good for it's intended purpose.
on March 12, 2012
This young author did something pretty amazing here. He wrote one of the best carrot on a string books I've ever read in my life.
To explain what I mean further, men love women and that is no secret. Not all men love leading an attractive lifestyle though. Not all men enjoy physical exercise, reading, eating right, becoming emotionally aware, or many of the other things this "guide to attracting women" teaches you you must do in order to be an attractive man. A lot of guys want easy solutions. This book explains that there are no easy solutions. I'd like to personally thank the author for laying that fact down for everyone. I hope any guys that reads this review takes one thing away from it, that there are no easy solutions and hard work is fundamental in success with your love life. This book will help you focus that hard work in ways that equal success.
A lot of books these days will sell you a shortcut method. The only shortcuts that might work don't work for very long. If you want to be an attractive man you have to work hard on yourself and get rid of a shortcut mentality completely. Women can tell when you throw a band aid over a shotgun wound that you are bleeding all over the place and that is all a lot of the information out there today is.
Another great thing about this book is it's (sadly) novel advice about vulnerability, connection, and emotional awareness. This book does a better job than any of the other men's dating advice I've read in the past 2 years explaining the rolls these things have in our growth and development as men and how working on this area of yourself will improve your love life drastically.
I really enjoyed the section on "How to be Fascinating" as well as the one on "Demographics". The polarizing section taught me a lot quickly too.
Overall I give this book 5 stars. It could have been a little shorter but considering how much bullcrap is out there that guys are reading to get girls it's not a big deal at all because it isn't a huge book full of crap. It's a huge book full of great information to teach you how to become an attractive man, relate and interact with women you find attractive, and have healthy relationships with them (as well as yourself). If the author is guilty of anything it's putting too much great information into one book and not charging you for sections of knowledge instead.
I can't wait to see what other books the author comes out with next as this seems to be his first.
If you are a guy that is having trouble with his love life, read this book immediately. Don't buy 20 different books and join a pickup lair and watch a bunch of Youtube videos. Read this book first. Evaluate where you stand as an attractive man first and understand wherever you are you can improve. It's a long road from where you are but if you start walking... no running down it, you will start to see some great results in your life soon.
on March 3, 2014
I got into pickup girls starting off with reading "the game" by neil strauss. At the time I was completely clueless and thought this was the only way to pickup girls by playing tricks but I was unwillingly to not be myself. I knew there had to be some way I could be myself and get girls. I went through another 2 years of various programs and books which did help me but I was not consistent and it was just me saying words, it was not from my core or who I was. Finally, I found models and it taught me a lesson that changed my life. Being an attractive man is not anything you say, it is who you are. Girls can take a look at you and see if you are attractive or not before you even open your mouth. They feel the energy immediately from your beliefs and sub-communications. This book is not a bunch of pickup lines or how to get good overnight. It is the beliefs you need that will permanently make you an attractive man so that what to say is not even a thought in your head. This is how to truly be yourself while having attractive beliefs and behaviors. I have read many books on attraction and this is by far #1 the best book ever written on how to become successful with women and just successful in general. If you want to get good with girls forget all the other BS techniques, save yourself years, and read this book. Thank you for this masterpiece Mark it had a huge impact.
on July 31, 2013
A few years ago, fresh from a heavy and hard-hitting break-up, I was back in the dating game and still utterly clueless. I began to hear things about the pick-up artist (or "PUA") community and soon began research into the field that would last for many months. I found that while I agreed with certain concepts they promoted -- cultivating self-confidence, finding comfort with discomfort, and practicing the nerve-wracking "approach" enough times until it becomes second-nature - I disagreed with others like using "openers", "pea-cocking" in ridiculous clothing, and employing put-downs in conversation, all of which seemed fundamentally dishonest to everyone involved including the "artist" and his target. I was happy to discover "Models" by Mark Manson, who recognized this unfortunate trend in the PUA ranks and wrote a book in order to promote his brand of "honesty" instead. It has stood as one of the best books of its kind that I've read.
Manson stands as a legitimate and relatable source of information. Once a hopeless loser with a streak of bad luck when it came to relationships, Manson soon became a PUA expert, bagging women weekly like the best of them. However, he soon became fed up with the pick-up life, finding dissatisfaction in its deceitful methods and its immature glorification of shallow sexual encounters at the expense of developing true relationships, and he eventually changed his methods. Enjoying his newfound results, he later wrote this book expounding on the many things that he'd learned along the way.
For the completely uninitiated in the ways of women, this is an excellent start. Along with "The Manual" by W. Anton, another guide for which I wrote a glowing review, "Models" describes many ways to improve your interactions with the ladies while still treating them with respect and being open with your intentions without compromising your personality or beliefs. If you've already read "The Manual", there is still helpful information available in "Models" that further supplements the former. My only complaint (and it seems to be shared by many who have reviewed it) is that the book can get, at times, puffy with repetitive examples of a concept. If you grasped it the first time around, you're free to skim, but on a positive note, Manson ensures that no one will walk away from his book feeling improperly schooled on one of his teachings.
In summation, if you've got troubles dealing with women or could just stand to use a refresher, look to "Models." I'm also glad to see that the Kindle price was reduced since I purchased it - I paid over $16 altogether - and it's now available in paperback for only slightly more. Get to it and reap the benefits!
on January 6, 2013
I'd been active in the self-improvement and seduction communities for two years before I read this book. I had read all the major books, read and commented in a pretty good seduction forum, and regularly read the blog of my favorite RSD instructor. And still, this book taught me more about seduction than anything else.
Mark Manson's method is amazing. Most theory is about hiding your intentions, demonstrating your value and fun. But that can get complicated and effort-intensive. Mark is all about complete honesty and direct action; tell a girl you think she's pretty, and don't be afraid of telling her your flaws and insecurities. I've had more success and more fun with girls in the six months since I read "Models" than in the two years before that.
Oh yeah, and there's more chapters about self-actualization, living your ideal life, and pursuing the women that best fit yourself and your life; as opposed to trying to attract women in general, or the "generic women."
Cannot recommend this book highly enough, and I also highly, highly recommend checking out his blog, postmasculine.com
on May 13, 2012
This book does not provide any mind blowing logic that will change you over night. Really its quite the opposite. The author tells you what you need to hear and what will work and often does it in a very entertaining way. It's kind of like Dale Carnegie books. You read them going "well duh...of course that's what I should do." But do you actually do what he says? Chances are you're not. Probably because you're too lazy or because you're more likely to spend your time studying some ridiculous concept which in the PUA world would be "negging, cat-string theory, or routine stacks" instead of trying a simple plan and focusing on changing your mindset and life.
While the author was at one time a coach for a Pick-Up Artist company he appears to have severed any ties with the industry after finding that its key concepts and ideas are more likely to hurt your social and dating life than help it. I couldn't agree more. I am now 29 years old and started reading PUA related material about six years ago. I really don't have anything to show for it. If anything it made me more neurotic and wierd. And I've been told that I'm a really good looking guy by the women in my life! Had I spent the last six years just doing what the author says I would be living a much healthier and happier life.
Okay, now for the things I didn't like. The version I bought had a lot spelling or wording errors. It wasn't enough to get super annoying but there were enough errors to be noticeable which isn't a good thing. Some chapters are too long and repetitive and cause the point he's trying to make to be blurred. I checked out his web-site and appears that he updated the book to fix these problems. It looks like Amazon is selling this new version so hopefully new readers won't have these issues. I may even buy the new version just to have which tells you how much I liked this book!
Hope this review helps anyone who is interested. I really think this book by itself, if you make an honest effort to implement its advice in your life will help you much more than anything Mystery, Neil Strauss, or Love Systems could do for you.
on March 11, 2013
This book is excellent. It really covers everything. I want to give it 5 stars, but have to stick to only 4 for two reasons:
1) The main one is, as with most books on this subject (in my opinion), there are not enough examples given. Men having trouble in this area need concrete examples.
2) This is minor, but I find the title of this book somewhat... I don't want to say "misleading", but not descriptive of what the book is actually about. I'm not sure what "Models" refers to (although I'm sure most would think this is a book about how to date models? It isn't...) and it isn't exactly "Attracting Women Through Honesty," it's more about becoming the best version of yourself (of YOURSELF, not some BS "alpha male" ideal, or something) you can be, improving yourself in general in any and all areas, and then putting that on display to women.
I really liked that this book was realistic. No, you won't get to have sex with any and every woman you see. Yes, you will get rejected sometimes. It is what it is, and its OK. In fact, the author makes a compelling argument as to why rejection might even be considered GOOD, in many cases.
I thought this book was an excellent companion to another book I thoroughly recommend, The Manual: What Women Want and How to Give It to Them by W. Anton. These are not books by the same author, so there is SOME contradictory material in them, but generally these books I feel convey similar messages, and having that information presented in two different ways I personally found very helpful.
I would strongly advise any man having trouble in this area to pick up and read both of these books. If after reading them both, you still don't get it or are still having trouble, you need to stop reading and start doing. These are, in my opinion, the ONLY two books you need on the subject. If you think you need more, reevaluate yourself.
on July 16, 2014
Unfortunately, I can count myself among the droves of those who chose to be part of the PUA community in the mid to late 2000's.
Being a teenager, learning all these techniques & tricks (mostly) gave me an exaggerated sense of self and identity.
Taking my PUA persona (which I always identified as a separate part of who I really was) into college, I ran into the inevitable problem of failing to maintain long term relationships of any sort. I told my best friend and wingman at the time that I felt like I had trouble maintaining the cool, interesting personality traits I exhibited upon the initial conversation. I felt like I was "acting" most of the time and not really being myself.
My justification to try harder was the fact that I did indeed end up with women that were beyond what I would have imagined myself being with. Even if it only was a short fling, I felt some validation from these encounters.
Fast forward many years later, sure I had amassed a large collection of pickup failures and successes, but I hadn't really gone anywhere or grown much in terms of my sexual identity. Enter Mark's book.
Not only did Mark give me a clear perspective on what exactly I had been doing wrong for so many years, but he practically narrowed down the reason many guys get laid.
Being unapologetically yourself.
You hear people say, "Confidence is the most important thing a person can have." so much, you tend to tune it out after a while, reasoning with yourself that it isn't that easy and those people don't know what their talking about.
Well, the truth is, it is that easy (to a point). With all the little intricacies that go into every part of the seduction according to PUA logic, especially following so much of it for 8 years myself, it seemed like Mark took this book and hit me really hard over the head with it, clearing all the unnecessary gunk I had learned and gave me an easier way to do things.
Now, I don't feel guilty whenever I end up with a woman, knowing I'm pretty much being myself and not "acting" cool or mysterious when in reality I'm really just an easy going guy who enjoys the company of others. If she doesn't like that, I don't care, I'll find somebody that does, as should you.
on May 28, 2013
I've combed the pages of countless books, scripts, forums, and blogs, seeking some answers to my woman woes. Most gave me 'tricks' and 'plans to execute' and told me to just 'be myself, my confident self'.
None of that stuck with me. I need to understand why, and how human sexual/interaction works.
And Mark Manson does just that, with this book. Half the book is self-help, and not only explains on emotional terms what being an attractive man is all about, but it opens your eyes to something that transcends meeting women. This book will cause you to question your emotional self. Your amibtions, your life. It's beyond Pick-Up. The second half gets into detail about attraction, and communication.
Best book I've ever read on emotions, attraction, social improvement.