Customer Reviews

A Mom Just Like You

5 star:		(8)
4 star:		(4)
3 star:		(4)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

This is one of my favorite books. My copy has been loaned and returned several times, and I've filled the margins with stars, exclamation points and amens!**! I'm so extremely thankful Mrs. Farris and her daughter took the time to write it.

If anyone has doubts about children being able to be properly educated at home, they need look no further than this book. It was written almost entirely by Mrs. Farris' second daughter, Jayme, who was only in her early 20s at the time of publication. As I read it again recently, I was simply amazed that a young woman could capture the wisdom and experience of her mother, and what a joy it must have been for them to work together on this project.

I can't understand the other reviewers who write negatively about this book. The title is absolutely perfect! It's not supposed to be a practical how-to guide; it's a journey, a very personal peek into the life of a large, successful homeschooling family. Mrs. Farris bravely tells the story of how she came to be a mother of ten children and why they chose to homeschool.

I've heard Michael Farris speak before, and I too wondered what kind of a woman could possibly mother and teach ten children. So that's why I bought the book to begin with. Mrs. Farris writes, "I am a very normal mom who happens to have a very visible, talented, and energetic husband...I struggle regularly with feeling overwhelmed...A super-mom could certainly write her own book! I am very much a mom like you. And from one normal mom to another, let me just tell you that God is faithful..." (Her husband is a successful attorney, the founder of the Home School Legal Defense Association, founder of Patrick Henry College, professor, author of several non-fiction books and novels, and has won many awards.)

The theme of her whole story is that God alone can enable and give grace for a person to accomplish anything. Mrs. Farris grew up as a shy, only child who had little practice in domestic arts or caring for children. She even admits that she is a "scaredy cat" when her husband is away traveling. Yet she uses her weaknesses to draw on God's strength.

The book encompasses her journey of child-bearing, beginning with the birth of her first daughter, and ending with her new role as grandmother. She goes into great detail about how she and her husband made the decisions that led them along this path. It made me see how powerful information is to women in their child-bearing years. While listening to a Focus on the Family radio show, she became interested in homeschooling. Later, it was through reading a magazine article by C. Everett Koop as well as Mary Pride's book, The Way Home, that she decided to relinquish control over planning her family size.

The whole book is funny and encouraging. We see her youngest Peter jumping off the coffee table. We agonize with her as she is planning a wedding while still taking care of a child in the middle of the night. We see how her daily afternoon walks help her stay sane and refreshed.

She explains the Farris' principles of child-rearing, mainly "our ultimate goal is to not to raise children, but to raise adults." She discusses the delicate balance between rights and responsibility as children move through different ages. This wisdom is so helpful for moms in the trenches with young kids (like me). I can't personally talk to Mrs. Farris about why her kids turned out so well, but I can read her philosophy and reasoning, and it makes me want to trudge onward and upward, never losing hope.

The last two chapters are extremely inspirational, and for anyone who is planning a mother/daughter speech or tea, these chapters offer you great ideas. She quotes another of my favorite authors, Elisabeth Elliot, who says, "None of the gifts of my own life -- not my "career" or my work or any other gift -- is higher or more precious to me than that of being someone's mother."

The high calling of being a mother is precious indeed. I'm so thankful to have a book that reminds me once again of this powerful truth.

--Reviewed by Heather Lynn Ivester, Mom 2 Mom Connection

I confess. The real reason I bought A Mom Just Like You is because I just self-published a book on the same topic, and I wanted to check out the competition! It's an awesome book! Vickie Farris may be one of the most famous veteran home school moms in the world (she has 10 kids and is the wife of the President of the Home School Legal Defense Association) but I don't detect any conceit in her at all. She tells you what she has struggled with, what she has done about it, and most importantly, how our Gracious God has brought her through. Her second oldest daughter, Jayme, co-wrote the book with her. This team did an excellent job.

When I received this book, I noticed a section where Vickie describes the tough challenges presented by her oldest daughters, and I read these paragraphs to my own oldest daughters. One of them shouted out, "That's me! She's writing about me!" It was such an encouragement to her.

The whole book was a boost to me. It's so great to know I am not alone in all I face. All home school moms will appreciate this book but I think it will especially meaningful to those who are educating a whole houseful.

Several reviewers were very disappointed by what they considered to be a misleading title...I wanted to ask them a question...don't you think the author could have meant that she is just a mom...just like you are a mom? Not all moms are the same. There is no way ANY author could write a book that could address EVERY mom's unique experiences. Why should we expect that? The only thing a person can write about with true authority and sincerity is what they have experienced themselves, and I certainly felt that this book was sincere.

What I liked best about this book (which is a favorite of mine and I have recommended it to others many times) is the honesty with which the personal experiences of this family are shared. It was encouraging to read about the struggles they had with various issues and how they resolved them. They did not claim to be perfect...what a relief to hear that not everybody "gets it" the first time and that other people struggle with obedience and attitude just like I do. ( In this area she IS a mom just like me!)

Sometimes in books we get the impression that some other way is just so EASY (at least for the person who wrote the book) and figure that if we try that particular method it will be easy for us, too. The reality is that by the time people get around to writing a book it IS easy for them because they have taken the time to iron out the wrinkles and they may have tried a half dozen other approaches to find the one that worked best for their family. That is why I really liked this book...the reader is allowed to see the wrinkles in the journey, and seeing those imperfections greatly encouraged me about my own. Thanks to the authors for sharing their ups and downs!

This book was kind of like having tea with another mother down the street who has been homeschooling longer and listening to her story and the wise advice hidden in it. Not everything was a perfect match for me, for who else's life is, but I can still get a lot from the lessons she learned in her story. For example, while I cannot afford a housekeeper or paid helper either, I CAN befriend the lonely teenager across the street and foster her love for children by letting her play with my little ones while I get some uninterrupted work done in the next room, solving the same two problems (messy house, no time to clean) in a different way. I was just grateful to hear that I was not the only one who struggles to meet the needs of the family and the desire for a clean house...and it helped to hear her husband's advice to "let things go a bit." Whew! You mean an immaculate house, home baked bread, and perfectly behaved children who love what they are doing every day, all the time, is not necessary? Hooray! Sure, I would love that, but it is not realistic to expect that all the time. This book helped me see that I can get beyond the difficult days, get creative with the solutions, and above all, listen to God for my answers.

On the subject of the family planning chapters: my own husband and I have been wrestling with this one for years as I have a chronic migraines and he is in the military and often gone. This book is one of the major factors that is encouraging us to let God decide what is right for our family (we currently have four blessings) and I am grateful for it. Releasing childbearing to the Lord may not be where another reader is at in their journey when they read the book, but I, for one, am glad that the chapters are there. I really didn't feel it was in any way condescending. In fact, I thought the author was quite transparent about all the times she and her husband chose to disobey what they felt God was telling them to do. That's brave, not condescending. Also, it was to those same two chapters that I went after we lost a baby to miscarriage, for I felt Vicki really understood the pain of that loss, yet also understood the Sovereignty of God, and I was greatly comforted.

Thank you for the encouragement.

This book was given to me by a home-schooling mom. I have since read it and am giving it to a young mom considering home-schooling. Though not full of detailed information about day to day function of a large home-school family, this book does address several basic questions about the "why" of families and home-schooling.

I picked up Vickie Farris' book on a whim and laughed and cried my way through it. Farris' very personal book touches on the subjects of curriculae and scheduling, but if that's where you're at, there are probably better, more detailed reading materials out there. This book deals with the step before that; the point where you feel maybe home schooling is for you, but you're lacking confidence that you have what it takes to do it. Farris lets you follow the path that took her to where she is, a home schooling mother with 10 kids (3 of which are now adults!). Her honesty, vulnerability, and straightforwardness is very encouraging and moved me from being terrified to being excited about home schooling our son. Couldn't have done it without her!

I eagerly purchased Vicki Farris's book because I am the homeschooling mother of nine children. Just like all homeschooling moms, I struggle with keeping up with the housework, the laundry, trying to teach multiple levels, dealing with "the littles" while trying to teach. I was looking forward to the encouragement I would find from "a mom just like me"

I was most definitely disappointed. I agree with another reviewer that too much of the book was spent on the Farris's personal conviction of "letting God plan their family" (hinting that those that use birth control are NOT letting God plan their family). However, I was most disappointed with finding out that the way that Vicki Farris "survived" teaching and mothering such a large family is the Mommy helper that she hired to watch the younger ones and help out with laundry, the cleaning lady who comes once a week to do the deep cleaning, the lawn service that takes care of the yard. There was no encouragement to be found here for me . . . even down to to the DIScouragement I felt by hearing that Vicki Farris lost all of her pre-pregnancy weight with each child.

Most of the homeschoolers I know can't afford outside household help, yard help or Mommy's helpers. Most of the the homeschoolers I know don't have large families. Most of the mommies I know are still struggling with losing pregnancy weight. When will a REAL homeschool mother write a book to encourage other REAL homeschool mothers? Maybe I should write one myself.

This book isn't really about "A Mom Like Me", nor is it really about homeschooling.

The author is an apparently wealthy mother of 10 homeschooled children. [I say apparently wealthy because her husband is a well known lawyer and she employs a weekly housecleaner, yard person, and mother's helpers - not something most of our budgets will cover].

The book also has really very little to do with homeschooling - extremely little practical advice and only a couple of the chapters are even about homeschooling. There IS a chapter on the religious beliefs that led this family to homeschool, and a very general, superficial [and not so useful] chapter on "homeschooling a housefull".

Instead, this book is a very personal story of the author's life, her faith journey, and her religious beliefs. She is strongly in favor of homeschooling, which one would expect, but she is also very strongly in favor of some other ideas - such as foregoing all family planning [including natural family planning] and "letting the Lord determine her family size" as well as the idea of the wife submitting to the husband.

The book includes a very detailed and personal story of her reproductive history, as well as how she and her husband came to their beliefs. She includes very appropriate scriptural references for everything she suggests and puts forth very intelligent arguments.

While this book was not at all what I expected, I did find it interesting, easy to read, and compelling. I may not agree with all of the author's viewpoints, but I can certainly see how she arrived at them and I can follow her spiritual logic. I enjoyed the book thoroughly.

There was a slight shadow of arrogance running throughout the book that was a little annoying. It was sort of a sense of "this is how *I* do things and my way is the right way". Sometimes it felt a little like the author was saying "see how wonderful I am!" I didn't agree with all of her suggestions or the way her family handled everything, but I still found the book very interesting and thought provoking.

I am a homeschooling mother of 3 children (with number 4 on the way), and I learned about Vickie Farris by attending a recent Christian homeschooling conference in Idaho where her husband was a featured speaker. Her husband was a fascinating, funny, interesting, and informative lawyer and father of 10, so I figured that his wife would have alot to share that would be of interest to me on many levels! I was right about that! The two chapters that Mrs Farris actually writes are exactly what I wanted to hear - her own honest experiences shared in a heart-to-heart manner. I was disappointed to realize that her daughter (who was not yet married or a mother herself) wrote the majority of the book. I am sure it was a bonding experience for both of them, but the "voice" of the author gets lost and it would have made a much better read if the mother could have taken the time to write the book herself (even if it took longer). I understand she was busy with her family, which I respect, but perhaps the project should have been put on hold until she was able to have the time to devote more time to it.

My favorite part of the book is the chapter on birth control, and how she and her husband came to trust the Lord in that area. That is something that my husband and I have dealt with and came to the same conclusions as the author, so for that chapter, it was worth buying the entire book (so long as it was at a discounted price!)

This book is more of a bio of the author's life and her brood. There was very little homeschooling information in it. The author spent many pages talking about not using birth control and while I found this topic interesting, many probably will not. If you're looking for a book about homeschooling, don't get this one, but if you're looking for a book about what God says about contraception (or what the author believes about this issue in relation to Christians), then you'll be in luck. I was looking for both, which is why I did like the book a bit.

While an enjoyable read, I found this book to be not as focused on the home schooling aspects of the Farris household as it was on their family concerns. For example, a significant part of the book deals with their decision not to use artificial birth control (50 pages) and giving priority to God and your husband (another 50 pages). If you are home schooling (or thinking about it) for reasons other than a biblical directive you perceive, this book may not offer you as much as you'd hoped.