Customer Reviews

The Mom I Want to Be: Rising Above Your Past to Give Your Kids a Great Future

5 star:		(25)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

The slogan goes, "Perfect people need not apply." It's the same with motherhood. Suddenly you are thrust into the role (well, normally after nine months). What type of mother will you be and how can you avoid the pitfalls and improve on the actions of your own mother? Suzie Eller has faced these types of questions head on with her practical and well-written book. At the end of each chapter, readers can apply the material to their own lives with some spaces for writing. Also a leader guide is included to promote small group discussion.

I loved the tone of this book and here's an example from the introduction: "I don't pretend to have all the answers, but I will share my story and the truths I've discovered along the way. Rather than try to speak as an expert, I want to connect with you as someone who 'gets it.' I've experienced dysfunction, and I know how it feels to want to get on with life but still feel trapped. I know what it is to pick up the past over and over again and even to use it punitively. I know what it is to pray and hope for better for my own children and family. And now I know how amazing it feels to lay down the past by offering forgiveness and replacing hurtful memories with brand new thoughts and direction."

Or here's another small portion deep inside the book (page 125) in the chapter "Becoming a Risk-Taker" Suzie presents three principles for the reader to consider:

1. You don't have to try to be anyone but yourself.
2. When you accept who you are, you are more accepting of others.
3. When you take calculated risks, you discover talents and facets of your personality waiting to be developed.

Use the contents of this book to give your own journey as a mom a huge boost.

When I look at the cover of this book, the title says it all: The Mom I Want to Be. I want to be like the mom pictured on this cover, smiling happily with her children at the beach. She's beautiful, her kids are dressed in adorable clothes, there's an ocean in the background. Everyone looks ecstatic.

But the reality of motherhood is that I don't live anywhere near the beach! I've got piles of laundry to wash, sticky floors to mop, dinner to cook, and toys to put away. T. Suzanne Eller's book gave me a refreshing view of how to focus on the positives of mothering. Through doing so, we can discover the deep joy God longs for each of us.

Eller's childhood wasn't perfect, and her book contains memories of pain. Yet she wrote it with the blessings of her own mother, whose journal entries provide readers a glimpse of what was going on in her mother's life while she was raising her family.

Each chapter contains a journaling section, with questions to help readers work through issues in their own lives.There is also a handy leader's guide in the back, to aid anyone desiring to gather a group of women for a book study.

Chapters such as "The Power of Perspective," "Setting Boundaries," and "Becoming a Risk-Taker" will inspire women to be the best mom they can be: not perfect, but full of the deep joy that comes from making peace with the past and moving forward with hope.

The Mom I Want to Be is different from the other "mothering" books I've read. Eller tells her story of a dysfunctional family life and how she has overcome it to be a successful, loving mother. If you had a less-than-wonderful childhood or even if you simply struggle with minor pain from your past, you'll want to read this book. It's a vivid portrayal of the effects of our words and actions as parents can have on our children. It's also a touching story of how these hurts can be overcome.

Don't let the title fool you. This wonderful book is for women everywhere. It shows women how to deal with major issues, whether they have children or not. It talks about forgiving, breaking down walls, and much more.

Ms. Eller is a breath of fresh air because she's real. Her mother, Mrs. Morrison, deserves five stars for her courage in this project. Both of them made me laugh, and cry.

The following lines, written by Suzanne's mother in chapter ten, brought the tears: "If I could talk with someone whose life is like mine once was, I would say that God is the great Healer. He can make you whole again no matter how broken you once were. He can give you a new spirit on the inside of you. He can give you what you need to forgive the wrongs done to you, and he can give you what you need to forgive yourself for what you have done to others."

These lines, written by Suzanne after she mentions having surgery in chapter nine, made me belly laugh: "Faith was holding my hand. Her bright cheerful voice was just as powerful as the drugs in my system. She was also the person who hit the drug-dispensing button too many times (because I was moaning in my sleep) and helped me discover I was allergic to morphine. I woke up swollen like a sausage."

I grew to love these women by the end of the book.

I believe you will as well.

I highly recommend this book.

This book is a MUST READ for any and all. There are so many adults walking around with so many wounds from their past, Suzanne shows how to take the good from the past, leave the bad and move on in your life a richer, better person. My children are now 20 and 23 and this book was an AWESOME read! I shall be a better grandparent when that times comes than I would've. What a great testimony of her and her mothers relationship to come from where it did....to where it is today! I just found this book facinating! I'm telling everyone I know it's a MUST READ!

Author Suzie Eller delivers a profound and honest message with divine wisdom. This non-fiction book reads like a novel at times. Her stories grab you at the start and you find yourself holding your breath until the application is made. Just open the book and read the first few sentences of chapter one and you will be hooked. Grab a box of Kleenix first.

This is an inspiring book that is helping me become the mother that I have always wanted to be. Every mother has questions and insecurities. I am one of those moms. I am so glad that I took the time to read this book. It helped me look inward and find not only confidence in myself as a mother but confidence in my relationship with the Lord. This book has helped me grow as a person and as a mother.

This is one of the best books I have read in a long time. Every person, whether from a "great" family or a "not so great" family struggles with issues in parenting or from the past. I picked this book up and could not stop reading. I have read, re-read, highlighted, took notes, laughed, cried, and most of all, learned from this book. This book has inspired me to try and make each day with my daughter a special one.

I bought two copies for my sisters and they have been ministered to, blessed, and inspired by this book as well.

This book motivates you to trust in God, learn from and put the past behind you, and strive for a great future for yourself and your family.

This is a must read for everyone -- men, women, parents or future parents!

The Birth to Five Book: Confident Childrearing Right from the Start

Ohmygoodness, I relate to this book! It pulled on my heartstrings. Like many readers, I wanted to be a good mom; to parent better than I received. Of course my parents had loving intentions, but like the author, I "experienced dysfunction and know how it feels to want to get on with life but still feel trapped." Counseling helped me identify conscious or less-than-conscious parenting patterns that could be injurious to my children. I truly believe all parents WANT to be good parents, some lack the skills or are themselves weighed down and stagnated by an injured inner child. This amazing book offers thoughts and direction to overcome hurtful memories and improve your parenting skills. It is positive and liberating.

Page 62 says, "Your memories can be obstacles, or they can be lifelines to others seeking answers. Your memories can be chains, or they can be keys to changing your response to your own children." I submit that painful memories can even affect you on a less-than-conscious level. I appreciate that the author writes with tenderness toward her family; she doesn't "bad mouth" or disrespect her parents and even includes her mother's reflections, which gives the reader a different perspective.

I recommend this book for personal or group study. Be the mom you want to be...read this book for your kids' sake. Give them healthy, happy memories!

My name is Regina, and this book has helped me heal from so many past hurts that I can't help but wish I'd had it 20 years ago when I first became a mom. The author offers so much wisdom and insight! I knew other women could use the help and healing, so I recommended to my Women's Ministry leader that we offer a summer class to read the book and do the study. We had over 24 women signup and complete the study - 24 women who now cannot stop talking about the work God is doing in them through this book. Thanks to God, Suzanne Eller, and 24 women with open hearts, this has been a summer of healing, forgiveness, and growth as a mom.