Money Harmony [Paperback]

Olivia Mellan (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: May 1, 1995

How to resolve money conflicts in your light and relationships

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

After discussing money "types" (hoarders, bingers, spenders, monks) and current cultural realities, psychotherapist Mellan offers a particularly balanced study of the often-hostile male-female relationships in private money matters. Reassuringly objective, she sees hope for improvement "if men and women will begin to understand each other's 'culture' and not take the differences between them so personally." Mellan pinpoints frequently divergent views on investments, philanthropy, banking arrangements and intra-couple communication which must be mutually approached, she stresses, "with curiosity and compassion" and eventually "depolarized" to a middle ground through "love letters," structured "moneytalk" and negotiation. Case histories are offered to illustrate the process. First serial to Brides and Your New Home magazine; Fortune Book Club and QPB selections; author tour.
Copyright 1994 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Kirkus Reviews

A thoughtful, thorough workbook designed by a psychotherapist who has been leading seminars on the subject since 1982. The book starts with a ``money personality'' quiz to determine the individual's relationship with money. Readers can find out whether they are hoarders, spenders, money monks (who feel guilty about having money), or avoiders (who can't face practicalities such as budgets and financial planning). Mellan then advises a family history to help trace the subconscious factors that underlie those attitudes and behavior. Mellan debunks common myths that equate money with love, happiness, power, freedom, self-worth, and security, then she adapts an old gestalt technique to formulate a ``money dialogue'' in which the subject ``talks'' with a personified ``Money'' to reveal the emotional foundation for financial woes. Mellan then moves on to address the polarization of money types within a relationship, giving attention to gender differences. Working in a similar vein to Deborah Tannen (You Just Don't Understand, 1990), Mellan says that the genders are socialized differently about money, leading to miscommunications on the subject. Men, she says, use money in a competitive way, to assert themselves or improve their status. Women, on the other hand, see money as a cooperative tool. In charitable giving, for example, men measure power by the size of their contributions; women care more about the nature of the organization and their connection to it. The last few chapters are devoted to specific techniques for effective communication, resolving money conflicts, and achieving money harmony. Despite sometimes simplistic or redundant prose and occasional lapses in clarity and consistency (new money types not covered in the original quiz keep cropping up), this should be a useful aid for both individuals and couples to resolve their money conflicts. -- Copyright ©1994, Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Product Details

• Paperback: 252 pages
• Publisher: Walker & Company (May 1, 1995)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0802774563
• ISBN-13: 978-0802774569
• Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 6.2 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (4 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #265,881 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

13 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Learn your own money "style" -- and your mate's, October 13, 1998

By A Customer

This review is from: Money Harmony (Paperback)

Psychotherapist Olivia Mellan has seen the relationship problems that money conflicts can cause. As she puts it, "money is never just money." Her experience with couples who clash over finances is laid out in this helpful book, where you'll learn how to identify your own money "style." Since that may differ from your mate's, Mellan offers advice on how to resolve communication problems about handling money, and set financial goals that'll work for both of you.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Wise counsel for financial counselors, August 6, 2002

By 

Robert A. Caldwell (Jackson, TN United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Money Harmony (Paperback)

This is a very helpful and insightful book for financial advisors! Understanding a client's money personality is essential to rendering helpful and practical advice and counsel.
So is understanding the money dynamics of marriag and couple relationships. I have found this book to be of tremendous help in my financial planning practice. HIGHLY recommended!

Robert A. Caldwell, CPA

2 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Great Finance Book for Couples!, November 9, 2005

By 

Michelle Jones "editor of BetterBudgeting.com" (www.BetterBudgeting.com - ATL, GA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Money Harmony (Paperback)

Chances are, if you're in a relationship you've experienced differences of one kind or another, after all, opposites do attract. However, while many differences can prove to be beneficial to a relationship, conflicting money personalities can often cause serious financial problems. In Money Harmony, psychotherapist and author, Olivia Mellan, provides helpful exercises, dialogues, and other communication techniques to not only resolve these conflicting issues, but more importantly, to restore harmony to the relationship. I definitely agree with John Gray, PH.D. and author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus... every couple should learn the techniques described in this book! - Copyright 2005 by Michelle Jones, editor of BetterBudgeting.com