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Mortified: Real Words. Real People. Real Pathetic. (Paperback)

~ (Author)
Key Phrases: Aunt Liza, Steve Rating, The Guiding Light (more...)
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (30 customer reviews)

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Mortified: Real Words. Real People. Real Pathetic. + Mortified: Love Is a Battlefield + Passive Aggressive Notes: Painfully Polite and Hilariously Hostile Writings
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  • This item: Mortified: Real Words. Real People. Real Pathetic. by David Nadelberg

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Starred Review. If the only way to heal painful high school memories is to laugh at someone else's painful high school memories, this book can accurately be labeled the antidote. Based on Nadelberg's stage show of the same name, this is a raw, hilarious compendium of real childhood and high school journals, essays and letters, with rueful commentary from their now-adult writers-each of whom deserve applause for their bravery and generosity. Entries enumerate the dumb-founding horror of sexual awakening ("I like him. But I don't know if I like him. But I don't hate him. I don't wanna like him!"), the frustration of feeling different ("I hate Black History Month. It's the one month out of the year when white people feel comfortable to ask me all sorts of strange, inappropriate questions") and the bizarre dreams of adolescence (such as one contributor's Duran Duran fan fiction, which must be read to be believed). Unafraid to delve into sex and drugs, Nadelberg even includes some charming amateur erotica written by a clueless twelve-year-old. Illustrated with great awkward-phase photos, this treasure-chest of confusion and angst will make readers squirm and smile with the realization that, as Nadelberg puts it, "we were all that same strange kid."
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.


Product Description

Share the shame.

In the days before blogs, teenagers recorded their lives with a pen in top-secret notebooks, usually emblazoned with an earnest, underlined plea to parents to keep away. Since 2002, David Nadelberg has tapped that vast wellspring of adolescent anguish in the stage show Mortified, in which grown men and women confront their past with firsthand tales of their first kiss, first puff, worst prom, fights with mom, life at bible camp, worst hand job, best mall job, and reasons they deserved to marry Simon LeBon.

Following the same formula that has made the live show a beloved cult hit, Mortified the book takes real childhood journals and documents and edits the entries into captivating, comedic, and cathartic stories, introduced by their now older (and allegedly wiser) authors. From letters begging rescue from a hellish summer camp to catty locker notes about stuck-up classmates to obsessive love that borders on stalking, Mortified gives voice to the real -- and really pathetic -- hopes, fears, desires, and creative urgings that have united adolescents for generations.


Product Details

  • Paperback: 416 pages
  • Publisher: Simon Spotlight Entertainment (November 28, 2006)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1416928073
  • ISBN-13: 978-1416928072
  • Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.5 x 1.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (30 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #128,299 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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David Nadelberg
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Customer Reviews

30 Reviews
5 star:
 (16)
4 star:
 (8)
3 star:
 (4)
2 star:
 (1)
1 star:
 (1)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
4.2 out of 5 stars (30 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

 
15 of 15 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars This Book Is Funny Delicious!, December 15, 2006
I personally kept a journal (fine, diary) all through grade school, junior high (the most horrid two-years of my life) and high school. I can't help but cringe when I read back on my childish angst, anger and insecurity. But when I read Mortified I realized I was not alone. Not alone in ending my entries with a "bye bye" as if the diary were an actual friend (like I had any)and not alone in obsessing shamelessly over boys who barely knew of my existance and never did become aware.

The selections made from the various journals are all genius, but I especially loved David Nadelberg's "Unsent Love Letter" which starts off with "Hello Leslie! How is your day today? Mine's quite well, I must admit." So dorky and so sweet and it actually gets intentionally funny for a high school sophmore. I'm just saying, it would've worked on me!

All the entries are good but my favorite part was being able to flip to the back of the book to the What The Hell Happened section and see, well, what the hell happened.

So, if you have any voyeuristic tendencies what-so-ever, or you just like a good My Sharona reference, pick up this book.

Bye bye.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars this book is funny., December 6, 2006
By Vanessa Rios (bay area, CA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
If you've ever wanted to peek into somebody's diary in middle school, or you passed mean letters to your friends between classes, this is the book for you. My favorite piece in this book is titled 'duran duran fan fiction' which is exactly what it sounds like. I was laughing so hard that I was crying. Although the diary entries get a little repetitive, they are funny nonetheless. You also get to hear the authors "adult" perspective as to why they wrote what they did. If you're a fan of Found, you'll definantly enjoy this gem.

But don't take my word for it...
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars LOVE IT! Great idea and great book!, January 15, 2007
I loved it so much I bought it for my sister for Christmas. I've even been to the show! I disagree with those that say it's not as interesting as the show is as I've experienced both. These are all the people we all went to school with! These people are us! It's fun to read it and equate it to my high school life and friends. Even though there's a name attached I still think "I knew that person in high school!" It's comforting to know that you're not the only one who went through all that "drama".

Oh! I'm just jealous I didn't think of it first!!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Hi-lar-i-ous
This is a MUST read if only for "The Porn", which is quite possibly the most insanely funny thing I have ever read. I laughed and laughed until I cried and got a stomachache. Read more
Published 7 months ago by Vanessa Blaylock

5.0 out of 5 stars SO FUNNY!
I read this book over and over, laughing out loud the whole time! Then opted to pass it along to friends. I could not get enough of it! Read more
Published 8 months ago by lady of the house

5.0 out of 5 stars Loved it!!
Mortified: Real Words. Real People. Real Pathetic.

This is so true and so funny.
Published 12 months ago by Darcy L. Bown

3.0 out of 5 stars Painfully funny
Painfully funny. It was good, I liked it, but after a while all the stories started sounding the same and I was sort of just reading to get to the end. Read more
Published 13 months ago by P. Smith

4.0 out of 5 stars Voyuer
This peek into the young lives of our peers, parents, bosses and complete strangers hits closer to home than we might like. Read more
Published 19 months ago by Kristy Caley

5.0 out of 5 stars As Good As The Live Show!
Mortified is a fantastic live show that I attend regularly in Los Angeles. I bring friends and encourage others to attend. It's a great show and now, an equally great book. Read more
Published 19 months ago by C. Browne

5.0 out of 5 stars Freaking awesome.
Hilarious. I don't think I stopped laughing the whole time I read this book. I have since re-read it several times. It is divine in its funnyness. Read more
Published 19 months ago by M. Mistretta

4.0 out of 5 stars Mortified
I enjoyed this book although I wish there were more information or background from the "adult me says" section. Read more
Published 20 months ago by B. Hodges

5.0 out of 5 stars I think this is funny
I first must admit, that I have a piece in this book, and I've been in the show. So my opinion might be biased. Read more
Published on September 3, 2007 by Lori Fowler

3.0 out of 5 stars Kind of Funny
There are a few gems buried in here. But is it worth buying the whole book to get to them? I don't know. Read more
Published on April 14, 2007 by Merrin Folender

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