My 1,000 Americans: A Year-Long Journey through the Personals [Paperback]

Rochelle Morton (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: July 17, 2001

English female, 30s, slim and attractive, seeks professional male for fun times.

Think you've seen and heard it all? London-based writer Rochelle Morton hooked up with a thousand men in eighteen months, and her blow-by-blow account of the experience is the most eye-opening and hilarious dispatch from the singles front since Bridget Jones cracked open her diary.

A bestselling author in the U.K., where her first book, Eat Your Lonely Heart Out, chronicled England's "lonely hearts" scene, Rochelle is no stranger to power dating. But the overwhelming response to this "slim, attractive English female" surprised even her; after placing just a single innocuously worded ad in six different American newspapers, she was inundated with more than two thousand recorded messages begging for a date. Using a highly scientific "meet one, delete one" winnowing process, she ultimately contacted a thousand would-be Romeos and recorded her interactions and meetings with each in meticulous detail.

Did she find true love amongst the slew of cheating husbands, Anglo-philes, bullies, lonely guys, and fetishists (foot, food, feline, and otherwise) who answered her ads? Are American men different from British men? Are there any nice guys out there -- anywhere? For anyone who has considered dipping a toe in the personals dating pool, My 1,000 Americans is required reading and proof positive that truth is stranger than fiction.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

No stranger to the personal ads, Morton, who described her blind dates with more than 700 Englishmen in Eat Your Lonely Heart Out, decided to find out if "men are men the whole world round," and placed the same ad "English female, 30s, slim and attractive, seeks professional male for fun times" in papers in Florida, Atlanta, Chicago and New York City. Using the "meet one, delete one" rule, she quickly filled her calendar for breakfast, lunch, drinks and dinner for the next year. More than half the men she met were married; some even brought their children along ("This is the secret we can't tell Mommy"). Many were Anglophiles who expected Morton to know their favorite Monty Python skits. Others were just weirdos: one guy dressed up as a king for their date and another hid dead animals under his raincoat. Whether single or married, most of Morton's dates showed a comical lack of decorum, merrily divulging their sexual fantasies over beer or pasta primavera. (Not surprisingly, the briefest chapter chronicles the handful of "nice guys" who were actually interested in getting to know her.) Most women, particularly those fed up with the singles scene, will laugh at the men's blatant inappropriateness and Morton's witty and icy replies, yet her litany of puerile male behavior grows tedious and somewhat repetitive. Moreover, Morton's repeated indignation about all the "lonely penises" she encounters seems less convincing after several hundred dates; one begins to wonder if she isn't a bit of a tease. Still, like her popular fictional compatriot Bridget Jones, Morton offers a lighthearted and ultimately optimistic diversion from sober, instructive dating books. (Aug.)Forecast: With a 20-city morning-drive satellite tour and advertising in the personals sections of several major weekly newspapers, Morton's book should have no trouble reaching its target audience.

Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information, Inc.

From the Inside Flap

English female, 30s, slim and attractive, seeks professional male for fun times.

Think you've seen and heard it all? London-based writer Rochelle Morton hooked up with a thousand men in eighteen months, and her blow-by-blow account of the experience is the most eye-opening and hilarious dispatch from the singles front since Bridget Jones cracked open her diary.

A bestselling author in the U.K., where her first book, Eat Your Lonely Heart Out, chronicled England's "lonely hearts" scene, Rochelle is no stranger to power dating. But the overwhelming response to this "slim, attractive English female" surprised even her; after placing just a single innocuously worded ad in six different American newspapers, she was inundated with more than two thousand recorded messages begging for a date. Using a highly scientific "meet one, delete one" winnowing process, she ultimately contacted a thousand would-be Romeos and recorded her interactions and meetings with each in meticulous detail.

Did she find true love amongst the slew of cheating husbands, Anglo-philes, bullies, lonely guys, and fetishists (foot, food, feline, and otherwise) who answered her ads? Are American men different from British men? Are there any nice guys out there -- anywhere? For anyone who has considered dipping a toe in the personals dating pool, My 1,000 Americans is required reading and proof positive that truth is stranger than fiction.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 224 pages
• Publisher: Three Rivers Press; First Edition edition (July 17, 2001)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0609805002
• ISBN-13: 978-0609805008
• Product Dimensions: 7.9 x 5.2 x 0.1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.6 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,516,167 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Laughed 'till I cried, July 30, 2001

By 

peggy mount (Oregan) - See all my reviews

This review is from: My 1,000 Americans: A Year-Long Journey through the Personals (Paperback)

Rochelle Morton's book was hysterical, I couldn't put it down and now have passed it on to my co-worker. We both agree that although she did meet a lot of jerks it's a lot more fun than reading about so called nice guys. I'm sure all women have a tale or ten to tell about the wierdo's they have met throughout their dating life. So you go girl, I loved it.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

1.0 out of 5 stars My 1,000 Americans: A Year-Long Journey Through the Personal, November 28, 2001

By A Customer

This review is from: My 1,000 Americans: A Year-Long Journey through the Personals (Paperback)

One thing about Rochelle Morton's little ole ad: " English female, 30's, slim and attractive, seeks professional male for fun times." Read it and sleep. So how come she cranked in a truck load of waste-of-space-nutso-jobs? Starting with the guy who dressed as the King of England. Sorry folks, this doesn't ring true-- it sounds as if she made it up. Ok, so I only dated around ninety guys in about a year's time-- I didn't meet anywhere near as many wierdos, wackos, married-and-trolling-the-internet (in my case it wasn't the personals), and just plain icky guys-- but maybe it's because I approached the whole--er-- project with an upbeat, positive attitude. Oh, and I didn't waste my time on married guys either. So, just what was the point of this book? Those of us who date know it's a numbers game. In Morton's case, numbers game takes on a new and almost meaningless slant. What can we learn from her adventures? There are few real details, barely a scene, not much dialog. Just page after page describing one loser after another. Time after time, Morton ends each little description with a supposedly pithy comment on her poor date's inability to measure up in any one of a thousand ways. Dating is like almost everything else in life: you get back what you put into it. Read Morton's book if you're looking for a good snore.

5 of 6 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Obtuse and ungenerous, September 2, 2001

By 

Garth Snyder (Seattle, WA USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: My 1,000 Americans: A Year-Long Journey through the Personals (Paperback)

This is a surprisingly mean-spirited and disingenuous book. Ms. Morton runs a sexy personal ad ("English female, 30s, slim and attractive, seeks professional male for fun times") and then is shocked, shocked to find herself in the company of men looking for sex. Some of the respondents are in fact entertainingly weird. However, I was more often struck by Morton's vicious rejection of even the most pedestrian quirks. She seems to have no real interest in or understanding of the human drama around her. These guys may be creeps, but many of them deserve a better date than Ms. Morton.