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My Alien Self: My Journey Back to Me (Memoirs of Amanda Green Book 1) [Kindle Edition]

Amanda Green , Debz Hobbs-Wyatt
4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (27 customer reviews)

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Book Description

One of many 5* reviews... "What an interesting, fun and well written life story this is - I was engaged right from the start and couldn't put it down. Amanda's certainly packed a lot of exciting adventures into her life! I would thoroughly recommend this book not just to those suffering with mental health issues, but to those who would also like a jolly good read!"

If I told you I’d been to twenty-four Countries (twenty-one by the time I was twenty-two), that I’d worked in Japan for nine months, toured Australia for six months, enjoyed seven months in Thailand and met and campaigned for the Orangutan in Borneo, you might think that I was pretty lucky.
If I told you I’d worked in the hotel industry, for a sexual health department in a hospital and with prisoners in a drug cell block of a male prison, that I’d worked as a recruitment consultant, in so many office jobs I’ve lost count, as well as having my own company and multiple websites, at age thirty-six, then you might think I’ve had an interesting life.
But if I added to that a mix of child rape, mental health problems, promiscuity, drug taking, alcohol abuse, eating disorders, self-harm, violence, mood swings, obsession, jealousy, loss of self worth, being raised by a mentally ill mother, bankruptcy, thyroid and gastro problems and public masturbation in school at age nine, then I am not sure what you’d think.
But this is me; Amanda Green. This is my life, my story; my journey back to me from depression, anxiety, panic attacks, OCD and Borderline Personality Disorder – mental illness which manifested during my life and came out ‘to it’s peak’ in my thirties.
I was able to use my collection of mementos, photos, diaries, journals, letters, emails and text messages of my past to finally see who I had become, and more importantly with a combination of therapy, medication and my writing, how I became that alien self and how I found the real me.

The editor (Debz Hobbs-Wyatt) adds…
This is the journey of a normal working class girl, trapped in a roller coaster world of disorder and excitement, love and joy, depression and anger – and her fight against stigma
While My Alien Self would be inspiring for any sufferer, their families or medical teams in its honest insights into living with a mental illness, it also has universal appeal. For who, at times, has not felt their life spin into chaos and wondered what is normal? This story effectively and openly highlights just how fine the line is between what is normal, and what is ‘mental illness’ And everyone who reads it will be able to relate to it.

Contains explicit language and sexual scenes

Emergence had this to say '‘We very much enjoyed reading this honest and powerful account of Amanda’s journey from diagnosis to recovery. We applaud such authentic and candid accounts of the devastation that can be experienced by those living with personality disorder and of the message of hope and recovery that the book conveys.’

Bon Dobbs (Anything To Stop The Pain and Author of 'When hope is not enough') said 'While there are many borderline personality disorder memoirs out now (including The Buddha and the Borderline, Loud House of Myself,Get Me Out of Here, Girl in Need of a Tourniquet and Poisoned Love – see this link), My Alien Self goes a long way to providing hope to the sufferers of BPD. By publishing the steps taken to reframe certain ways thinking, through CBT worksheets and other exercises, the author has revealed that recovery from BPD is possible.'

I self published this book and am very proud of that fact, because I was able to write it exactly as I wanted it to be written, with the help from my fabulous editor, Debz Hobbs-Wyatt. Whilst the massive help a publisher and agent gives, they do narrow down what is published, so I took on the journey to publish it and market it myself.

There’s a sequel out too, called '39'. It's quite different, but it leads on from this one :-)

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

I am Amanda Green, author of 'My Alien Self - My Journey Back To Me' and the sequel '39'. 'My Alien Self - My Journey Back To Me' is my memoir which follows my journey through travel, excitement, normality and mental illness to find myself again. '39' is about what happened afterwards; the year before reaching the prime age of forty, family relationships, love and memories. I want to inspire others that it is possible to recover and have a life worth living. Because I grew up with my mother having severe Schizophrenia, who had been incarcerated in psychiatric hospitals for years, and felt the bullying and loneliness that stigma can spread, I campaign to 'stop the stigma surrounding mental illness. I also felt the wrath of stigma when I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality disorder. Many people do not understand mental illness, so judge people unfairly. So I created where I publish articles on the topics covered in my story, including self help, depression, bankruptcy, Alcohol/drug abuse, family and relationships, sexual, physical and mental abuse, anxiety, anger, Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), self harm, Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), Anorexia Nervosa/Bulimia, mindfulness, panic, rape, Schizophrenia, pychosis, Suicidal thoughts, , paranoia, dissociation, mood disorder, thyroid issues and psychology. I will be working with mental health charities, magazines, newspapers, social networking and other PR projects, actively making people aware of this disorder through every means possible through the media. But also, I hope that my books will help other sufferers and their families and friends to understand BPD and mental health and how to help oneself to feel better. I want to raise awareness to the general public about mental illness and the stigma sufferers have to deal with. I hope that Doctors and the medical industry involved with mental health will benefit from reading my stories, as they unfold what it is like to suffer from debilitating mental illness from the inside out and how it manifests itself. But I have also written my memoirs in a style that I hope will be compelling and sometimes shocking reads for anyone interested in memoirs with a twist, so that I can reach more people. Outside of work, I love eating out and reviewing restaurants, travel, days out, campaigning for the precious Orang-utan and the issues of unsustainable palm oil production, running six websites of my own and seeing my family.

Product Details

  • File Size: 1013 KB
  • Print Length: 488 pages
  • Page Numbers Source ISBN: 1493784862
  • Publisher: Amanda Green; 1 edition (May 29, 2012)
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B0087HBUWU
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #450,504 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
15 of 16 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A must read for people with a loved one with BPD September 5, 2012
By Miguel
Format:Kindle Edition
After I ended my relationship with my ex-fiancee I learnt that she suffered from Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Getting over her has been the hardest thing I've ever done, mainly because I loved her more than anything'and she was an amazing woman, but also because been with her was taking a toll on my emotional and physical health.

Amanda's book has been an outstanding discovery that will help understand many of the causes and also the effects that BPD has on the person that suffers it and also the effects on her/his/ loved ones. Page by page I started to feel more and more in peace with my ex-fiancee and specially in peace with myself.

The book actually takes you to witness a process of BPD development in a clear, accesible, honest and valiant style. It's an exercise of generosity in itself and helps mirroring some of the situations I came across in my own relationship.

After reading the book I felt proud of myself and decided to keep the love for my ex as one of the most valuable relationships I've ever had. This book is a whole different approach than the traditional readings on the matter. It cames from the heart and soul of someone who experienced it and had the courage and generosity to support others through her personal writing. It deserves to be read. I'm sure all readers will find Amanda's words useful and supportive.
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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great read for anyone December 10, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Whether you have BPD, other mental illness, or none of the aforementioned, you should still read this book. Very entertaining, honest, no holding back by the author at all. It can help people better understand BPD, whether or not you know someone who has it. I love her humor and I love how she's not afraid to tell like it is, at least from her point of view which is the one that matters.
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11 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Highly recommended! July 30, 2012
By Madison
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Highly recommended, a must read for many reasons. This memoir is exciting, full of zeal, strength, wisdom, information and hope and that's to name a few. It is the kind of memoir that many who read it will relate too because it touches on so many things that makes it hard not to identify with the author.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Intimate insights! February 26, 2013
By J.
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
While reading "My Alien Self" I often felt off kilter, as if what I was reading was going off in several different directions at once and then when I realized that Amanda Green was actually conveying her own inner turmoil, it helped me to truly understand what life can often be like for someone with Borderline Personality Disorder.
Through all the confusion, chaos of dealing with her mother's own mental health issues as well as her own, Amanda is able to give a personal testimony that you cannot gain from reading other books about BPD.
Ms. Green has done an amazing job of giving detailed, intimate descriptions of her thought processes while trying to keep it together in search of a more balanced life, proving that people with mental health issues are not any different than people who are thought to be `normal.'
This book would benefit mental health professionals as well as family members of those who suffer with BPD as it offers an insight not found in many books.
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I initially downloaded this book because I am interested in psychology, different personality types and how people overcome life's difficulties. However, I am also a fellow sufferer of depression so I very much related on a personal level to many of the issues Amanda describes so eloquently and positively in her `alien journey.' What an interesting, fun and well written life story this is - I was engaged right from the start and couldn't put it down. Amanda's certainly packed a lot of exciting adventures into her life! Not only is the book very useful for those with Border Personality Disorder, OCD, anxiety and depression by describing the various treatments that Amanda has tried over the years, it also inspires hope, courage and a light at the end of the tunnel. I would thoroughly recommend this book not just to those suffering with mental health issues, but to those who would also like a jolly good read!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A brave and honest story that has stayed with me March 25, 2013
Format:Kindle Edition
I read this book a few weeks ago and struggled to find the words to write a review. Not because I didn't like it but because I wanted to do it justice. I believe many will relate to a book like this either from personal experiences of mental health issues or of others they know. The story highlights the stigma still attached to mental health issues which is so frustrating. It demonstrates how hard it can be to ask for help and then to actually get help. It shows this young woman's determination to get better and to find a way to identify and recover from her BPD and OCD among other things.

Mental health issues have been misunderstood for so long and books like this one should help others to understand they are not alone and that help is there. It is a very brave and compelling read written with sincerity and brutal honesty. I believe 'Amanda' has written it in her own voice and in her own style, which works well for her story and the lack of detail of certain areas, as other reviewers have referred, is not necessary as the focus is on Amanda, as it should be for this type of story.

To lay yourself bare, warts and all, for all to read about is very brave and while there are aspects of the story that annoyed me I quickly realised that if I had written about my life then I would have those moments too! It is so easy to judge and hopefully this book will help others to understand the sometimes irrational reactions and actions of those suffering from mental health issues. It is not a choice to suffer from such illnesses and with help recovery can begin. Well done on sharing your story Amanda.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
1.0 out of 5 stars I was very disappointed. Borderline and The Buddha and Borderline was...
I was very disappointed. Borderline and The Buddha and Borderline was far superior
Published 1 month ago by J. Hillary
4.0 out of 5 stars A Compelling Read
If you're like me and love finding out what makes others tick then look no further. This is a startlingly honest and extremely interesting account of one woman's battle with... Read more
Published 8 months ago by Booklover
3.0 out of 5 stars This book started off great and I was excited to read it
This book started off great and I was excited to read it. It then became redundant and too detailed of her experiences. Read more
Published 8 months ago by Kathleen Morgan
4.0 out of 5 stars Memoirs, mental disorder and finding your path to recovery
I am a psychiatrist and as such I do have a professional (as well as a personal) interest in personal/first-hand accounts of mental illness (or disorder) and not only professional... Read more
Published 13 months ago by OlgaNM
5.0 out of 5 stars lost
My Alien friend is incarcerated.....if I knew he was going to nut I would have sent it to jail....Poor guy,,,,,He got the book immediately and I thought we reached him on time. Read more
Published 14 months ago by Julie Calvery
5.0 out of 5 stars Mental Health Awareness
For anyone suffering from any kind of mental anguish, I highly recommend My Alien Self. I have been through many life struggles, and most daunting were the demons in my own mind. Read more
Published 15 months ago by alice_faerie
5.0 out of 5 stars Fascinating & insightful!
I had been itching to read this book for such a long time and when life finally allowed me the time to do so I wasn't disappointed with what I found! Read more
Published 22 months ago by Alice Huskisson
5.0 out of 5 stars An Inspiring Read
I have a fascination with the human psyche, and often read memoirs of people whose lives have been shaped or twisted by mental illness. Read more
Published on May 10, 2013 by Jo Robinson
5.0 out of 5 stars I highly recommend this book!
I loved reading this book so much that I finished it in three days, and afterwards, it left me wanting more! Read more
Published on April 20, 2013 by Cara
5.0 out of 5 stars A must read
Amanda Green shares her life with BPD and mental illness in the pages of this must read book. I grew up with a mother and father very much like her own - and always felt alone in... Read more
Published on March 3, 2013 by Cheryl Ledwidge
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More About the Author

I am Amanda Green, self published author of six inspiring books.

Aside from writing and social networking, I spend a lot of time with my pets; a handsome cat called Titus, a pretty hamster called Molly and tropical fish. I strongly believe in pet animal therapy as being good for our mind, body and soul and I promote the fostering and adopting of animals as opposed to private breeding and purchase. I detest animal cruelty.

I love eating out and reviewing restaurants, travel, days out, campaigning for the precious Orang-utan and the issues of unsustainable palm oil production and seeing my family. I also enjoy reading, theatre, films, TV and cooking.

I have travelled on/off across the world, taking in twenty five Countries - living and working at times in Japan, Thailand and Australia and have enjoyed a very mixed bag of jobs.

I run six personal websites for which I write all copy and articles and provide all photography.

I have had my writing and photography work published in various magazines and local newspapers. I enjoy the challenge of getting published.

'My Alien Self: My Journey Back to Me' is my self published memoir of my journey through mental illness to recovery. I want to inspire others that it is possible to recover and have a life worth living. Many people do not understand mental illness and judge people unfairly, so I created where I publish articles on the topics covered in my story and campaign to 'stop the stigma surrounding mental illness'.

My aspirations are to be successful in fact/fiction storytelling in the mental health/relationship genres. I have unique ideas and have enjoyed various writer's retreats and short writing courses to further my writing.

I have just finished Counselling skills level 2 at college and am waiting to hear if I will be accepted on the level 4 course. I would love to be able to help others facing issues and adversities - fingers crossed! :-)


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