When a woman with brains and beauty from a wealthy background decides to take her fate into her own hands and challenge the restrictions of a male-oriented, conservative society, the consequences can be devastating. Born into one of Pakistan's most influential families, Tehmina Durrani was raised in the privileged milieu of Lahore high society, and educated at the same school as Benazir Bhutto. Like all women of her rank, she was expected to marry a prosperous Muslim from a respectable family, bear him many children, and lead a sheltered life of air-conditioned leisure. When she married Mustafa Khar, one of Pakistan's most eminent political figures, she continued to move in the best circles, and learned to keep up the public facade as a glamorous, cultivated wife, and mother of four children. In private, however, the story-book romance of the most talked-about couple in Pakistan rapidly turned sour. Mustafa Khar became violently possessive and pathologically jealous, and succeeded in cutting his wife off from the outside world. For the course of the fourteen-year marriage, she suffered alone, in silence. When Tehmina decided to rebel, the price she paid was extremely high: as a Muslim woman seeking a divorce, she signed away all financial support, lost the custody of her four children, and found herself alienated from her friends and disowned by her parents. Following the divorce, she felt she had to tell her story. When Pakistan publishers balked at the controversial nature of her manuscript, she published it herself. The book was a bombshell and shook Pakistani society to its foundations. Her at last was someone who had succeeding in reconciling her faith in Islam with her ardent belief in women's rights. Tehmina's story, adapted now for western readers, provides extraordinary insights into the vulnerable position of women caught in the complex web of Muslim society.
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Book Description
Editorial Reviews
Review
"'An extraordinary story'" The Sunday Times "'Riveting...one of the many remarkable qualities of Durrani's story is her total frankness...she emerges as a woman to be admired'" The Age, Melbourne
About the Author
A member of one of Pakistani's most influential families, Tehmina Durrani decided to write this book about they way women are treated in Pakistan after leaving her husband Mustafa Khar. In the writing of My Feudal Lord, Tehmina Durrani worked with William Hoffer, author of Midnight Express and co-author of Betty Mahmoody's Not Without My Daughter.
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Customer Reviews
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
5 of 6 people found the following review helpful
By A Customer
Format:Paperback
Though not very well written, this book does not fail to disgust and numb me. The startling revelations made by Mustafa Khar's wife, Tehmina, are almost too horrifying to believe. However, surprisingly, this battered wife who claims to have suffered so much pain does not evoke any sympathy from me which I believe she tried to seek. The story is about a pakistani politician who brutally abused his wives, who wrongfully used Islamic law to his advantage and at the same time committed sins such as adultary, and even conducted an affair with his wife's sister. However, Tehmina herself got involved with Mustafa Khar while she was still married and she also broke up Mustafa Khar's marriage with his former wife. The book does not arouse as much curiosity as it should, and towards the end begins to command even less attention from the reader. The book does not deserve more than a 5
11 of 15 people found the following review helpful
By A Customer
Format:Paperback
I thought "My Feudal Lord" was about a woman trying to divorce her abusive husband in a strict Muslim society. That's what the cover had me believe and that's what I wanted to read about. Instead I got poorly written babble - so poorly written that I didn't finish this book. Tehmina left a kind husband and her daughter for Mustafa - and she expects me to feel sympathetic when Mustafa forces her new family into excile in England! She turns her eldest daughter away THREE times - and then moans about travelling every day to visit her husband in prison. She had THREE chances to leave her abusive husband, and each time she returned. I wanted to shake some sense into this woman who, the 3rd time, returned to her husband because their 'political destinies were so closely linked'. I think her political aspirations and need to be associated with a powerful man overshadowed the physical damage her husband did to her. I won't recommend this book to anyone.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
Format:Mass Market Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
This book was the first recommended to me by a male friend in Pakistan when I visited there last year. Although not a new bestseller, it provides context for understanding Pakistan. Beware--it is not upbeat, but I found it thoroughly enlightening and helpful.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
4.0 out of 5 stars
Interesting read
I read this book during my flight from WA to Orlando,FL. It kept my interest and gave an accurate depiction of the history and traditions in Pakistani culture.
Published 8 months ago by Sadia Zafar
5.0 out of 5 stars
Great book
Great book! I can hardly put it down. The author really does a wonderful job of stirring your emotions for what she is going through.
Published 12 months ago by Deets
3.0 out of 5 stars
A little too exaggerated but a good read nonetheless
It was a very captivating book. I took it as a fictional book, so I enjoyed it. Rest assured that all elite (or any other type)ladies in "muslim" countries like Pakistan dont... Read more
Published on March 15, 2011 by A Greene
5.0 out of 5 stars
service
Hi, I was very pleased to be able to order a used book through your company, and amazed how little time it took to get the book to my house in New Zealand. Read more
Published on December 30, 2010 by angenieta
3.0 out of 5 stars
Not well-written but will keep you engaged
As someone whose parents lived and grew up in Pakistan, I find it pretty hard to sympathise with the Pakistani elite - if you want to blame someone for the state of the country... Read more
Published on November 28, 2009 by Caspar H.
5.0 out of 5 stars
MY FUDEL LORDS
SINCE BEING PART OF THE SOCITY I KNOW THE BOOK IS BASED ON THE FACTS. THERE ARE SOME PARTS SEEMS OVERDONE, BUT NOT REALLY. THE AUTHER HAS DONE A VERY REMARKABLE AND DAREING JOB. Read more
Published on April 15, 2009 by Amjad M. Waince
4.0 out of 5 stars
Bold and daring stuff...
This is an exceptional book because it presents in lurid detail how corrupt and immoral Pakistan's ruling, feudal elite truly is and how society turns a blind eye to this wretched... Read more
Published on October 19, 2003 by Ahmed Akhter
1.0 out of 5 stars
Own up or shut up
Tehmina Durrani has received both acclaim and flak for writing this book. I think she deserves more of the latter. Here's why:
Ms. Read more
Ms. Read more
Published on February 2, 2003
1.0 out of 5 stars
Own up or shut up
Tehmina Durrani has received both acclaim and flak for writing this book. I think she deserves more of the latter. Here's why:
Ms. Read more
Ms. Read more
Published on February 2, 2003 by buntuss
5.0 out of 5 stars
Great
OK, considering my age, my opinion may be ignored, but I recommend this book to anyone who enjoys a good book. Read more
Published on October 19, 2002 by 14 year old
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