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44 of 44 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Making the Unwatchable Somehow Watchable, December 12, 2001
This review is from: Mystery Science Theater 3000: Manos - Hands of Fate (DVD)
The current wisdom among bad movie buffs is that Ed Wood's "Plan 9 From Outer Space" is the worst movie ever made. Believe me, it's not. And if you don't believe me, then just watch this one. Try it without the MST gang and see if you think "Plan 9" is worse. "Manos," according to film critic Michael Weldon, was written, produced, directed by its 'star' Hal B. Warren, a fertilizer salesman from El Paso, Texas. The plot, as such, concerns Warren and his family, who become lost while on vacation. They stop at a strange house to ask directions and are met by the weird servant Torgo, who takes them prisoner and helps to make the next 90 minutes only seem like 8 hours. Even the MST gang had trouble with this one, as most of the good lines and ripostes are in the first half. One can actually feel this movie sucking the life out of the crew. At the end even Dr. Forrester believes he may have went too far. But one redeeming thing came out of this -- the addition of Torgo the pizza delivery man (played by Mike Nelson) to the list of characters that inhabit Deep 13. The only other caveat I can add is that this movie is for those seasoned MSTies only. If you are new to the MST experience, I would recommend "The Beginning of the End," or "I Accuse My Parents" to get you up to speed before tackling this one.
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23 of 23 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Tom Cruise IS Dr John, or John Brown . . . or something . ., April 11, 1999
"Cave Dwellers". "Wild Rebels". "Plan 9 from Outer Space". "Bride of the Monster". "Body Rock". "Howard the Duck". Any one of the "Gamera" series. People, as a guy who finds subtle humor and beauty in bad movies, I've seen the worst of them. . . .or so I thought. I must have been out of town that day, as during the "Joel years" I was a regular watcher, so that could be the only reason I missed "Manos: Hands of Fate" the first time out. I just got to say this: "Manos" makes the films listed above look like AFI 100 candidates. I mean . . My GOD, this movie is HORRID beyond horrid. If you're looking for a description of how it takes cinema to a new abyssmal low . . . well, here goes: Imagine getting a continually out of focus Handy 8 camera from the 60's, get 6 of your best friends (make ABSOLUTE sure they can't act), go to a local bar and pick the first 6 women you see and dress them in K-mart nightgowns, go to a desolate beach with a cottage in Ohio somewhere with a script you've written in one hour (and no more) and start filming away. Believe me, you couldn't do any worse. Every single solitary thing about this endurance test will make your brain start to atrophy. The commentary from Joel and the 'bots is top notch, but you know you have to feel sorry for the poor chaps when the SCIENTISTS apologize for "Manos". The opening edu-short "Hired" (light years better than "Manos", and that ain't saying much), put out by Chevrolet in the 50's, is hilarious as an added bonus. The "Manos" experience has to be seen to be believed. Buy this cobalt bomb of a movie, throw "Manos" parties and invite your enemies. You'll be glad you did.
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20 of 20 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
The Film that Fertilizer made. How appropriate!, August 8, 1999
By A Customer
"MANOS: the hands of fate" was conceived by Harold Warren, a Texas fertilizer mogul, apparently after a long day of shoveling a big pile of...well, you know, FERTILIZER. "Manos" is probably the worst movie ever made which is good news for MST3K fans because it's also probably the best MST3K episode ever! "Manos" is the kind of movie that isn't released by Hollywood, it escapes! I won't bother trying explain the plot, because there is none. Just suffice to say that some stupid, inept people behave foolishly, repeat themselves alot, repeat themselves alot and end up at the hands of the wobbly 'Torgo' and his 'Master', basically victims of their own bottomless stupidity. All filmed in fabulous "HAZE-VISION". Stars nobody, look for producer Hal "Bag-of-Hammers" Warren as the clueless dad. There's also a short before the feature, "HIRED pt.2", the second half of a Chevrolet sales training film from the 50's. (Don't worry if you haven't seen part 1, the really important plot points are in part 2!) BUY IT! ENJOY! ACCEPT THE PAIN!
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