Customer Reviews

The Myth of Mars and Venus: Do Men and Women Really Speak Different Languages?

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4 star:		(1)
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This book is certainly worth a read for anyone who's extremely tired of all the stereotypes about the "true natures" of men and women, as though we are somehow completely different species. The truth, of course, is that all that pop and evo psych bs is intended to excuse the bad behavior of men (and of course never of women). For instance, she does a brilliant take-down of the stereotype that women talk too much. However, my problem overall is that she'll start down a great take down of a stereotype, and right before she completely destroys the stereotype with awesome evidence, she backs off a bit and doesn't take it quite far enough. I also would have liked a little less focus on linguistics and a little more focus on behavior outside of speech or how it applies to the world. That said, this book is definitely worth reading. If nothing else, her chapter on how the only way rape can occur as a miscommunication is if all men are mentally disabled, is nothing short of magnificent.

I loved this book - it was well researched and all the assertions were backed up by sound logic yet it was extremely "readable." As a woman who has always found that "Mars/Venus" stuff not only patently false but also somewhat insulting - this book was like finding water in a desert.

My absolute favorite passage was when the author debunked that fallacy that men don't "hear" when women are asking them for help. Paraphrasing: "Is there a man alive who upon hearing his wife ask him if he can take out the trash ACTUALLY thinks that she is asking if it is physically possible for him to do so in the most abstract of inquiries." HA!

[...]

The excerpt is an excellent critique of the Mars/Venus gendered communication styles, with an instructive discussion of an investigation of a sexual assault case at a university. Incisive and insightful analysis and writing.