3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Revenge is a grapefruit, best served in the shower!, November 6, 2011
This review is from: Pure & Natural Body Wash, Renewing Grapefruit & Pomegranate, 12.8-Ounce Bottles (Pack of 3) (Health and Beauty)
The basics: This body wash smells great, it's gentle on the skin, and does it's job as a soap. I've tried many of the Pure & Natural scented body washes, but the grapefruit is by far, my favorite. Allow me to explain.
TRUE STORY:
Shortly after I started buying this product, I fell madly in love with a wonderful man. Having read somewhere, when the scent of grapefruit is in the air, men will actually subconsciously estimate a woman to be an average of 10 pounds less in weight. So, I thought, 'what the hell!? It smells good AND he may find me thinner. I'll buy him some!' That was the BEST. DECISION. EVER.
He LOVED it. Not only does it smell delightful, but he knew I also used this product. Because he lived out of state, every shower was a reminder of me. Long after he'd dry off, he would catch that subtle little grapefruit scent on his skin, throughout the day. It was then, that he'd instantly think of me and "pop a woody" (true story - at least that's what he told me). It's these little things that can make a long distance relationship not so stinky, right? If you get my grapefruit drift... Okay, okay, okay.. SO...
Fast forward several months, I'm visiting him and cuddling in bed. We're talking about our plans to move in together soon, start a life with each other, and he slips up. His guilt ridden self tells me he had previously been sleeping with his prior roommate, over a period of four months. (I looked her up on facebook, and she's not cute at all! I'm not just saying that because I'm bitter. She really did hit every branch on the fugly tree). WTH, right!? Anyway, he cried, I cried. Blah, blah.. Shock, anger, grief, typical betrayal stuff, etc. He profusely apologized and continued to do so every time I'd bring her up. This went on for months. I wanted to be able to move on from it, but I couldn't. I tried. That confession was just the beginning of the end... For ME!
But, thanks to Pure & Natural Renewing Grapefruit Body Wash, he can think of me each and every time his big nose gets a whiff of grapefruit, or anything grapefruit scented! While he gets these random little reminders of how he wronged, hurt, and destroyed that portion of my soul - which allows me to put trust, and love, into another human being ...I get a slight sense of justice!
Picture this hypothetical, pretentious, Brooklynite, scenario (That's where he lives, by the way):
His inner-dialogue, "Let's see, I think I'll go out for brunch today to a place that serves organic produce. Here in Brooklyn, having brunch with a side of chemical-free produce is like, good for people, and the environment. I better grab my Mac and my plaid shirt and walk (because walking is like, good for me, and taking a cab is like, bad for the environment.) So, here I am at this local, non-chain restaurant. I think I'll sit outside and take 26 minutes to decide what to order, thus making it more of a lunch, but whatev, cuz like, I want to feel like I haven't wasted half the day."
After extended communication, with the flamboyant waiter, about how Williamsburg is the new Manhattan, he decides, at the last minute, to throw in the grapefruit (with no sugar, because it's like, more healthy that way). Waiter gushes, "Good choice!" Food comes. He quickly consumes his dish, saving the tart piece of fruit till the last, knowing he'll want to cleanse his palate from that overpriced, savory crap he ordered. He cuts the grapefruit open. Seconds later, the molecules of remorse hit his nostrils almost the exact time his first bite of this off-season grapefruit stings his mouth. Just like that, his heart sinks and his tongue stings... Is it the acidic taste of grapefruit making him so sour? NO! It's the bitter taste of REGRET! (And that ridiculously hot kale and egg white omelet he just burned his tongue on). Despite the agony, he continues to eat the grapefruit in all of it's bitter glory; for he knows, he deserves every bite of my revenge. As the tingling sensation in his bowels grows, so does the sorrow in his soul.
Yes, sense of smell is one of the strongest ties to memory. Second, taste. So, do I feel slightly vindicated, knowing that he will forever associate grapefruit smell with me? Hell yes I do!
HELL. YES. I. DO!
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