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Negotiation Generation: Take Back Your Parental Authority Without Punishment Paperback – Bargain Price, September 4, 2007


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Product Details

  • Paperback: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Berkley Trade; 1 edition (September 4, 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0425217019
  • ASIN: B00164EBTU
  • Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.3 x 0.9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,436,681 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

"[Griffin's] arguments and repeated explanations will challenge parents to assert their authority differently. This book, rich in anecdotes, will make a great addition to any parenting collection."—Library Journal
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About the Author

Lynne Reeves Griffin, RN, MEd, is Executive Director of Proactive Parenting. She is a lecturer, writer, and consultant to parents, teachers, and health care professionals regarding child development, behavior management, and issues affecting today’s families. She is a frequent radio and television guest expert.
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More About the Author

Lynne Griffin is a nationally recognized expert on family life and a novelist writing about families. She is the author of the novel SEA ESCAPE, an Entertainment Weekly top ten book of summer 2010 and an Indie Next List Pick published by Simon & Schuster. Her debut novel LIFE WITHOUT SUMMER (St. Martin's Press, 2009) was a Target Breakout Book and Borders Summer Read. Lynne is also the author of the nonfiction parenting guide NEGOTIATION GENERATION: Take Back Your Parental Authority Without Punishment (Penguin 2007).

Lynne is a regular radio and television guest expert. She teaches family studies at the graduate level at Wheelock College, and teaches fiction writing at Grub Street Writers, both in Boston. Lynne is the co-creator of Grub Street's intensive book marketing and pr program, Launch Lab.

Her short fiction, essays, and nonfiction health, education, and parenting pieces have appeared in the Boston Globe, Salon, Brain, Child, Parenting magazine, the Drum Literary Magazine, Psychology Today, and more.

To learn more about Lynne's work visit, http://www.LynneGriffin.com or follow her at https://twitter.com/Lynne_Griffin.

Customer Reviews

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Finally, a book that appeals to your common sense!
Ryan's mom
While I got the book for my daughter originally, it interested me so much I read it myself first.
C. G. King
She teaches the reader to establish boundaries and honor them.
Better Mom

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

15 of 16 people found the following review helpful By J. W. W. on October 11, 2007
Format: Paperback
This is the second book I have read by Lynne Griffin. The first book was recommended to me by my son's preschool teacher. And when I heard a new one was coming out - I grabbed it. He is a very, very, very persistent and energetic (now) 7 year old and has always absolutely refused to take no for an answer. My husband and I were at the end of our combined ropes. We would witness his behavior and melt down and then react, mostly with anger. Our interpretation of Griffins approach is that you "get ahead" of the misbehavior and steer your child right around it. You sit your child down BEFORE anything happens and CALMLY explain WHAT is going to happen if they engage in their typical problem behavior (not listening, whatever it is.) and then CALMLY FOLLOW THROUGH with the consequences. Sounds reasonable enough - but we realized we weren't getting ahead of the situation rather we just lived in the chaos of the moment. We felt we were being demoralized by a child. We figured if we warned once, warned twice, warned three times and then ended up yelling that it was our son's fault. Well - of course it isn't, we just assumed he knew the right ways to react - we told him - loudly - all the time. This book tells you how to avoid this. I have to say when we actually are organized and using the methods, life is calmer and we feel more respect for each other and ourselves. Great book.
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Karen L. Carter on January 19, 2008
Format: Paperback
Lynne Reeves Griffin offers no-nonsense advice for "taking back parental authority without punishment." From establishing kid-friendly lifestyles rather than adult-centered lives for children, organizing early dinner and bedtime rituals that allow a child to perform well in these areas before they're too tired, demanding respect for all members of a household, building fences and adjusting them as a child grows not only in size and age but in emotional ability to manage more responsibilities and freedoms, to refusing to react emotionally or to talk (and talk and talk!) in the middle of a conflict involving rules that are supposedly non-negotiable, Lynne's strategies for working with rather than against a child while maintaining family order and parental sanity are all simple to understand and implement. I'd recommend this book to any parent or other adults who care for children. Since successful proactive parenting involves planning, reading this book before conflicts arise is one of the wisest moves a new parent can make!
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful By JHR on December 14, 2007
Format: Paperback
There were immediate results when I started to apply the concepts in this book. By predicting and preparing, there absolutely was less fuss, less stress, and specific situations were simpler for us all to handle. The analogy of life as a backyard, and parents' responsibility to create strong fences and to place age-appropriate options within the yard, was easy to understand and explain to others. Setting clear expectations and learning when not to talk sounds simple, but few of us do it, or do it right, and this book shows how so effectively!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Better Mom on January 1, 2008
Format: Paperback
Lynne Griffin approaches parenting with compassion and an endless supply of common sense -- all without passing judgment on the foundering parent. Negotiation Generation is that book you want to carry with you on trips to the supermarket when the 3-year-old is having a meltdown in aisle 5, when you visit your dear friend and her combustible teen, when your own patience wears thin and you no longer know where to draw the line.

Ms. Griffin's mantra is, "If you can predict it, you can prevent it." She teaches parents to understand their children's temperment, the harm in a parent's desire to make a child adhere to an adult's lifestyle, and how to decide when to talk vs. when to act.

The lessons learned in Negotiation Generation are ones which can be applied to all relationships. She teaches the reader to establish boundaries and honor them. Buy this book in bulk, you'll want all your friends to read it.
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12 of 16 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on August 20, 2008
Format: Paperback
Parenting is hard work, and all healthy children will at some point challenge "the powers that be". And for this reason, parenting books are a brisk business indeed!
There is sound advice to be found in this book, but it is enveloped between a heck of a lot of condescending "tsk tsking" that I feel, as a mother of older children, is just plain unwarrented.

The first chapter starts with a fairly standard (and tremendously vague) scare story of a child going from cherished infant to overindulged aggressive authority-cruncher, then the author assures us "it didn't have to be that way".
All the advice she is giving is better stated in other books, that do not need to do the "I'm a psychologist, and therefore I know better than you" routine.

I personally think that "How to Talk so Kids will Listen, and Listen so Kids will Talk" (by Faber & Mazlish) is pure genius (as is their book called "Siblings without Rivalry").
Also wonderful (and so beautifully practical, and practical is what parents need, not preachy) is "Playful Parenting" by Lawrence Cohen. His insights into how children "process the world" and his creative playful heart have over and over again "solved authority problems" between my children and I simply by playing, and with no need to give a lecture about "why adults need to be in charge".
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