Customer Reviews

The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation

5 star:		(20)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

"The New Codependency" is the newest addition to the volume of work published by Melody Beattie. She was one of the first to identify codependency as a problem and provide information on the subject to a large audience of readers. The first book she wrote, "Codependent No More", was originally published in 1987. This book does not replace that one, it just expands on the topic and adds additional insight to the problem of codependency.

If you are new to the subject and just getting familiar with it, I would definitely recommend you start with "Codependent No More". After you are further along in your journey, this book makes a lot of sense but I don't think it is the right place to start. It really builds upon the concepts presented in the first book and there is a subtlety to it that is best appreciated after having done some work in this area already.

As in all her books, I need to sit with a highlighter and use it freely. I also dog ear pages as I go for quick reference back when I need to review. I read it straight through and then went back and took some of the quizzes offered which was really helpful. After reading it once, it is definitely not going back on the book shelf. There are a lot of activities outlined to do to help the reader address and access issues he/she is dealing with. It is almost as if there is a workbook contained within its pages. I will continue to use it as a reference/workbook for many months to come, I am sure.

Anyone who has identified themselves as a codependent (or is dealing with a codependent) will benefit greatly from this book. She conveys her message is a loving, caring way versus a list of "shoulds" which is exactly what a codependent needs. A couple of my favorite passages:

"We're giving to get. We give to get people to need us because we don't feel loveable. Caretaking attaches people to us, creating dependent relationships."

"Another communication problem is draining energy or power from someone under the guise of "talking." People may act like they want to have a conversation with us, but many people with codependency issues use conversation as a way to get us to take care of them."

The two books truly are the gold standard on this topic.

Presents a needed update on thinking regarding codependency. This book addressed many of the problems I've had with the concepts of "codependency" over the years. Activities and quizzes give reader a way to put ideas into action in their lives. Probably not for someone new to Melody Beattie's work or learning about codependency in general - start at the beginning with Codependent No More or the daily readers. A strong addition to Melody's library.

After reading Women Who Love too Much, Codependent No More, Beyond Codependency, I still felt had unsolved issues and unanswered questions. This book answered them all! My realization of its success was after months when I realized its positive super effect on me. I watched my gradual behaviour change which made me a happier person. The friends who I passed this book over also feel relieved about their unsolved and leftout issues after reading it. I advise it to everyone who feel they need to read a bit more about Codependency...

Didn't speak to my experiences, felt meandering and lots of personal voice from the author about her journey as an author. Didn't like it. I would much more recommend the original text on co-dependency written 20 years ago, not this updated version.

I was new to dealing with codependency when I got this book and another by another author. I never finished the other book, and am now reading Melody's for the 2nd time.(in 2 weeks)I don't even know where to begin on how amazing this book is. How much she helped me to understand about myself. She has a way of explaining things to you where you understand. Friends and doctors have told me the same things for years, but reading her book put it all together for me. This book helped me to see that I am ok just the way I am. To love myself. To stop hating my past and present self. I have this new amazing content peaceful feeling that I have never known before. I have my life back, and maybe for the first time ever. It feels amazing! I don't feel alone anymore. I don't feel like a crazy weirdo anymore.

This newest edition of Beatie's is easy to understand and very helpful. I especially enjoyed the section on assessments in order to better understand behaviors.

book! To any of you facing dealing with co-dependency it is not an easy topic to think of or discuss. But I will share with you that this book does make it a little more easier to handle. Somewhat. Not a lot at first. But a little. It does open your eyes to a knew world you never thought would be possible and you discover a true happiness finally. Melody Beattie is brilliant. This is a must read and must have book.

Even if you've read her first books on codependency, visit this one. It's up to date, highly informative, helpful, and encouraging! Highly recommended!

Melody Beattie writes very practical, useful books that are so helpful to those dealing with this topic. The mixture of personal stories, questions to ponder and content to think about is wonderful and has never disappointed me.

This book gives an updated view of the concept of Codependency. Although previous books on the subject are useful, a slightly new perspective does come in handy in this current climate. I can't say it was entirely for me, but it does have a lot of general information that could benefit readers.