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The New Dare to Discipline Paperback – March 22, 1996

3.4 out of 5 stars 362 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

From the Back Cover

Much-needed answers to your toughest parenting questions.
Why are boundaries so important? Do children really want limits set on their behavior? My spouse doesn’t seem to care about discipline. Why am I stuck being the “bad guy” all the time? Is it okay to spank my child? If I do, will he think I don’t love him? Will it lead him to hit others and become a violent person?
Join the millions of caring parents who have found answers in the wisdom of parenting authority and family counselor Dr. James Dobson. The New Dare to Discipline is a revised and updated edition of the classic bestseller, designed to help you lead your children through the tough job of growing up. This practical, reassuring guide will teach you how to meet your children’s needs of love, trust, affection—and discipline.

About the Author

James C. Dobson, Ph.D., is founder and chairman of Focus on the Family, a nonprofit organization that produces his internationally syndicated radio programs, heard by more than 200 million people every day. He is seen on 80 television stations daily in the U.S. A licensed psychologist and licensed marriage, family, and child counselor, he is a clinical member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy and is listed in Who's Who in Medicine and Healthcare. Dr. Dobson is married to Shirley and is the father of two grown children, Danae and Ryan. He resides in Colorado.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 288 pages
  • Publisher: Tyndale Momentum; 1 edition (March 22, 1996)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0842305068
  • ISBN-13: 978-0842305068
  • Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.4 x 0.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 3.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (362 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #384,484 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback
I read the original Dare to Discipline book when my first two kids were 5 and 3 yrs old. The book taught my wife and I that much of what our old fashioned parents did in the way of spanking and punishment was really for our own good. But the book did more than that, it taught us that NOT everything our parents did was healthy or esteem building. Dr Dobson stressed that spanking was best limited to willful disobediance and unsafe/harmful behavior. I've seen the opposite of this philosophy so many times at the Mall, the Grocery Store and the ball field it makes my head spin. Too many parents yell at their kids or ask their kids over and over again to do this or go there...and the kids merely blow them off. Why should they obey when there are no serious consequences for disrespect behavior? Other parents pull out the belt or paddle for all deviations (which, of course, borders on abuse). Anyway, my wife and I spanked occasionally when our kids were blowing us off...when they were purposefully hurting other kids...when they acting in an unsafe manner (playing in the street or sticking their fingers in the sockets). My older kids are both full 4-yr scholarship winners in college and their younger siblings are straight-A students. Our kids also receive consistent praise from teachers, coaches and church leaders for their positive and respectful attitudes. Dr Dobson's advice works...especially if both you and your spouse use the techniques consistently.
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I am deeply saddened to see much of the negative, and frankly, flat out inaccurate information that many people have written in their reviews about this book. Before reading this book, I read many reviews, particularly the negative ones. And, after having carefully read the book, I am dismayed at how many reviewers clearly have not read it as their reviews grossly did not reflect what was in it.

My expectation was that Dare to Disclipline was going to be an advice book based on Dr. Dobson's experience. And while he did share many of his experiences (which were in an impressive variety of settings with children and families), I was surprised to see that it was far more what I would consider a summary of research study findings, and MANY thereof.

This is ABSOLUTELY NOT a spanking book or a book advocating voilence in any way, and Dr. Dobson makes that very clear in his book. To suggest that these claims are made is simply pure fallacy.

Lastly, I want to state that before reading this book, I knew virtually nothing of Dr. Dobson except that he is a significant part of "Focus on the Family." And since having read this book and starting another, which I am only 1/3rd of the way into and it has already well-surpassed the number of research references that Dare to Disclipline had in it as a whole, I have nothing but the utmost respect for Dr. Dobson. I cannot think of someone more qualified to write books about raising children than a man of his education, profound experience, and sheer eloquence in the delivery of such often sensitive information. I am grateful that such a person is available to give parents such valuable information, and I hope readers get as much out of it as I did.
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To read some of the other reviews here it sounds like this is a how to book on beating your child. Fortunately I decided to read this book and make up my mind for myself. This is not a "spanking book". This is a book about teaching a child discipline at home and school. One of the methods Dr. Dobson advocates is spanking, but this is definitely not the only means he mentions! Along with other non-physical negative reinforcements, he also lists and promotes many different positive reinforcements you can use with your child.

I would recommend this book even to someone who never plans on spanking their kids, not because I think they'll get talked into spanking by this book (although he does make a good argument for it), but rather because his method and philosophy could be implemented even without spanking. This book delivers an important message about discipline that I think all parents should rather, regardless of which side of the spanking camp they're on. Basically the most important (but definitely not only) message I got from this was is if your child openly and defiantly decides to challenge your authority, you should win that battle decisively. Spanking is but one method to win that battle. If more children respected their parents' authority our kids would be a lot better off. Of course that assumes the parents are deserving of respect, but if you're taking the time to read parenting book reviews I assume that you are. :)

Still not convinced this book that this book isn't only about spanking? In his book Dr. Dobson states that:
* All out spankings are not often required.
* Spankings should be reserved for a child's moments of greatest antagonism, usually occurring after the third birthday.
Read more ›
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Format: Paperback
After actually reading the entire book, it is clear that Dr. Dobson promotes a loving discipline that allows children to feel loved and accepted with a perfect combination of freedom and safety. What I like most about this book is its focus on nurturing imperfect yet cooperative and loving children. It amazes me that some people actually believe this book promotes abuse and harsh treatment of children. ... This book is for those people who really care for their children and their future. It is a perfect book that mixes common sense with sound professional advice based on years of research and experience. It is true that Dr. Dobson is not against corporal punishment. He stresses the appropriate use of it in limited circumstances. It is refreshing to read a book that is well balanced in this way. He resists the temptation to be cave in to the political correctness idea of no spanking, yet he draws the line and openly rebukes those who use corporal punishment as the chief way to discipline. If you are looking for a well balanced approach on discipline that focuses on love, nurturance, communication, and responsibility; this book is a must!
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