Customer Reviews

New First Three Years of Life: Completely Revised and Updated

5 star:		(36)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

Dr. White promises that following his common sense techniques in the early years will result in happier children and parents for years to come and he backs up his claims with specific studies throughout the book. The charts and data make this book a little cumbersome to read. For that reason, the advice offered in "The New First Three Years" seems better packaged for parents in "Raising a Happy, Unspoiled Child" by the same author. Both books offer the same valuable advice on how to handle each stage of early childhood development. I think any parent will benefit from reading Dr. White's approach to handling temper tantrums, selecting age appropriate toys, setting limits and most other developmental issues. Definately make time to read about his techinque in one book or the other.

This book has been wonderfully interesting to my husband and I as we have become parents. White divides the first three years into seven phases. For each phase, he describes:

- The developments to be expected (in detail)
- The child's interests and how to support them (for example, a newborn is primarily interested in simple comfort, being handled, sucking, etc.)
- The learning developments that should take place
- Recommended child-rearing practices
- Child-rearing practices NOT recommended
- Recommended toys
- The behaviors that signal the onset of the next phase.

We have used this book to select toys for our son, and I think it has saved us some money on toys that wouldn't be interesting to him (as first-time parents, we didn't know a whole lot about babies). We love to read about the developments he is going through, as well as what is coming next. There is also a great Recommended Reading section in the back for more info on many of the topics.

The most valuable baby gift we received when our daughter was born. More worn than the "What to Expect" books. We always read one stage ahead of where our daughter was at.... and we watched with amazement as she mirrored each developmental stages. Techniques for avoiding the overdevelopment of the intentional cry to eliminating undesirable behavior worked like a charm. Buy it.

I can't praise this book enough. Most books on child rearing are written from the medical perspective. You will find more information on health than on behavior and developmental issues in these other books. This book is for behavior and developement. The author was a Harvard professor, and the book is based on many years of actual research into child rearing and behavior with hundreds of real families. As the author warns you, beware of books not backed up by research. In the area of behavior, that's pretty much all of them except this one. In particular, this book shows you how not to spoil your child. And, since probably 80% of children are spoiled (any unhappy as result), there is a great need for this book. Our 1st child is now 8 months old, and he is doing great--hardly cries at all, and extremely happy. The credit goes 1st to my wife who is very loving and patient, but also to this book, for showing how to deal with his behavior. Our son is also extremely active; crawling all over the place since 7 months old; this book puts a lot of stress on developing motor skills and keeping your baby developing properly. I now give this a gift to other friends who have their first child. You will also need a medical reference book, of course; there are many excellent ones. We purchased the Mayo Book of Pregnancy and Baby's first year which is encylopedic.

I had this book by my bedside for ten years as I raised my three children. At times, the advice and wisdom seemed so contrary to what I was being told in the media and popular culture in the 1980's. Yet it was so refreshing to read about practical ways to assist my children in their develpoment, without the bells and whistles that our world tells us we must have. Burton White shows how to nurture your child's curiosity, which is a foundational element to their intelligence. My oldest son is in medical school, my second not far behind, and my third is keeping up with her two brothers. If anyone ever asks me my secret, this book is part of my answer.

When I was a new mother, for the toy recommendations alone, I found this book of great and indispensable value. (Though I was using an earlier edition, I am sure the toy recommendations are still as useful.) Dr. White tells you which toys are worthwhile and which are a waste of time and money. Often, the most expensive toys are the ones that may make the parents or grandparents or whoever feel good, but that are not useful or interesting to the baby or young child. With Dr. White's recommendations, you can avoid buying the useless toys and instead spend the money on something of true value for your child.

Also, sometimes a toy doesn't look like much and may be overlooked by a parent, but can provide a child with hours of enjoyment. And for that matter, there are things around the house that a child can enjoy that cost nothing, such as plastic mixing bowls and other safe cookware. My daughter had her own cupboard of safe things so she could keep herself occupied while staying with me in the kitchen. (The other cupboards had child safety latches on them.) She loved it, and so did I.

Probably the one thing that Dr. White did not emphasize enough in the edition I was using was the importance of reading to your child, starting at an early age and continuing until they no longer want you to read to them. Literacy is of vital importance to anyone, and it starts with being read to often. And not just read to, but read to in a loving, interactive way, where the child is allowed to ask questions and where the pictures and story are open to discussion.

So remember to buy books for your children, your nieces and nephews and other young relatives, and the children of your friends, and to read those books to them when possible.

We bought this book when our son was born in 1990. After having read other experts (Leach, Brazelton, Spock), we decided that this was the best of the lot--followed closely by Brazelton. White discusses each significant stage of a vey young child's growth and tells the new parent what he/she may expect.

The world renouned Missouri Parents as Teachers program is based upon this book. We are from Missouri but did not elect to enroll our child in the program until we read Burton White.

We have bought this book for just about everyone we know who was having a baby and we're still buying it!

When I read the reviews for this book, I was worried that it would be like so many anti-Attachment parenting books. I was interested in the toy recommendations, so I read it anyway. I just want to reassure any other Attachement parents who are eyeing this book that the author isn't anti-cosleeping as another reviewer suggests -- the author is very clear that he doesn't know much about cosleeping, so he couldn't (and doesn't) give any helpful tips for cosleeping like he does for cribbing.

That said, this is a really good, helpful book, with lots of great ideas. I really appreciate the author's work and his honesty about his area of expertise.

My parents made a lot of mistakes so I had to teach myself how to approach parenthood by reading books and observing other parents. I also sat in on some of Burton White's parenting classes in Newton, MA. This book is very well researched. The bibliography is excellent, too. I read through most it including Childhood and Society by Eric Ericson. Burton White and Eric Ericson both recommend something called "Mutual Regulation". The parent is in control and firm for some things and the child gets to control and lead for others. It's worth studying. Mutual regulation also applies to other relationships. My journey of reading, starting with this book, has helped me to become "unspoiled and happy" so now I am no longer terrified of becoming a parent.

If your parents were terrific, you may find this book to be full of "common sense".

This is another must-have' book for parents from Burton White. It examines the first three years in stages and helps you figure out the best strategies needed to help your child develop into a wonderful kid. From birth to age three, you are dealing with extremely high levels of stress and change that will never occur again. It is well worth the money to purchase this book which can serve to help you understand what is happening with your child and give you concrete information on how to best facilitate proper development and - most importantly - to keep your sanity. I highly recommend this book to any mother who is about to have a child and to all families who currently have a child under 3 years old.