Customer Reviews

Nice Girls Can (Men Can Too): Personal Ads : A Career Woman's Guide (Personal Ads : a Career Woman's Approach)

This book is most useful to women that are asking the
following questions: Will personal ads work for me?
How do I use them, and what are the logistics? Can
you give examples of the types of men I can meet?

The author had great success with personal ads, and
shares her enthusiasm. She describes numerous reasons
why this method is the best and safest way to meet
good men. Much of the book is spent describing the
logistics of ads: how to place them, what to say,
how to take notes when listening to responses, and how
to meet people. If you are a bit nervous about the
process, this will be useful information. If you have
ever placed an ad and met one of your callers
in person, you already know most of the material in
this book.

A huge portion of the book is spent on how to screen
large numbers of prospects. Women that place ads
often receive 50 responses a week in the early stages.
This demands a heavy screening process, since nobody
has time to meet 50 people a week. Men that read this
book will have to read these sections with a grain of
salt, since 5 responses a week is more typical for
them.

This book should be evaulated by what the author is
teaching, rather than evaluating the author herself.
But this (male) reader can't help be offended by many
of the things the author says. She appears to be
quite materialistic, and it takes some care to not be
immediately turned off by the first chapter where she
describes how she divorced her husband because his
career wasn't doing well. Apparently he switched
careers, resulting in a lower income and the need to
sell their mansion on the beach:

"I felt that, to save my children and myself from
certain financial ruin, I would have to take action.
It was all up to me. When our home sold, I filed for
divorce."

Men are also likely to be offended by her suggestion
that women lie. For example, if you don't want a man
to call, them them you are on vacation for 4 weeks.

The author also suggests that for first meetings,
make the man do all the driving. Meet him at a place
that is within 10 minutes of your home, so minimize the
time you need to commit. She explains how she once
violated her own rule. One man lived an hour's drive
away, so they picked a place half way:

"My candidate was a tremendous disappointment! He
was not only overweight, but he had a look that I could
never find attractive. Our conversation was strained,
to say the least. I politely pushed the date to an early
conclusion and drove the half-hour back to my home. This
little adventure took nearly two hours of my time. Then
and there, I resolved never again to make an exception to
my policy of meeting close to home -- no matter how good
the prospect sounded on the phone!"

Another suggestion/example from the book:

"Since your callers have to leave their phone numbers for
you to call them back, it's easy to go to a cross directory
and look up their address. I discovered that the lawyer
lived in a very small condo on a noisy, busy street -- not
a desirable or valuable location at all. Right or wrong,
I decided this was not a man I cared to meet. For all I
knew, he might have a huge savings hidden away in mutual funds, but I drew my own conclusion."

These nits aside, this is a good book for women that have
never placed a personal ad, but might be interested