Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: 101 Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers (A NICE GIRLS Book) [Paperback]

Lois P. Frankel (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: June 7, 2010 | Series: A NICE GIRLS Book

If you work nonstop without a break...worry about offending others and back down too easily...explain too much when asked for information....or "poll" your friends and colleagues before making a decision, chances are you have been bypassed for promotions and ignored when you expressed your ideas. Although you may not be aware of it, girlish behaviors such as these are sabotaging your career!

Dr. Lois Frankel reveals why some women roar ahead in their careers while others stagnate. She's spotted a unique set of behaviors--101 in all--that women learn in girlhood that sabotage them as adults. Now, in this groudbreaking guide, she helps you eliminate these unconscious mistakes that could be holding you back--and offers invaluable coaching tips you can easily incorporate into your social and business skills. If you recognize and change the behaviors that say "girl" not "woman", the results will pay off in carrer opportunites you never thought possible--and in an image that identifies you as someone with the power and know-how to occupy the corner office.

Editorial Reviews

Review

"Any woman intent on getting ahead in the corporate world should read this book. It's a fascinating crash course in image, influence, and communication, from an accomplished and insightful coach. Terrific stuff!" --Anne Fisher, senior writer, Fortune, and "Ask Annie" career columnist, CNNmoney.com



"Every page of this book is filled with something you or one of your friends do every day...A simple, quick guide to presenting ourselves as the strong and bold women we are." --Gail Evans, author of She Wins, You Win and Play Like a Man, Win Like a Woman

About the Author

Lois P. Frankel, Ph.D., is the President of Corporate Coaching International. She is a sought-after speaker. Her websites are www.drloisfrankel.com; www.gr8speakers.com; and www.corporatecoachingintl.com

Product Details

• Paperback: 288 pages
• Publisher: Business Plus; Reprint edition (June 7, 2010)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0446693316
• ISBN-13: 978-0446693318
• Product Dimensions: 5.2 x 0.6 x 8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 0.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (174 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,932 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #4 in Books > Business & Investing > Women & Business
  • #19 in Books > Politics & Social Sciences > Social Sciences > Gender Studies
  • #20 in Books > Politics & Social Sciences > Women's Studies

More About the Author

Dr. Lois Frankel attributes being an "avid writer" to having been an avid reader from childhood through the present. As a young girl growing up in New York she would anxiously wait for the next issue of the Weekly Reader to arrive at school so she could scour the back for new books to order at the cost of 25¢ each. Immersing herself in the stories of Little Women, Annie Oakley, Nancy Drew, and Cherry Ames Lois dreamed of one day becoming a writer herself. By the time she reached high school her focused shifted as she planned her career as a psychologist. It was only after her first book, Women, Anger & Depression: Strategies for Self-Empowerment, was published that Lois realized she had fulfilled her long-forgotten childhood dream.

Lois has always written about those things she feels closest to - workplace and women's issues. Her "research" is her experience working as a psychotherapist, business coach, and workshop facilitator for corporations around the globe. She was a pioneer in the field of business coaching and is still one of the few coaches in the country with a combination of ten years working in human resources at a Fortune 10 oil company and psychological expertise. Staying on top of the human aspects of business requires Lois to read the latest in business books but she still finds time for her favorite "true crime" authors such as Ann Rule and Patricia Cornwell. To learn more about Lois P. Frankel, Ph.D. visit her web sites: www.corporatecoachingintl.com and www.gr8speakers.com

Dr. Lois P. Frankel is the president of Corporate Coaching International as well as the author of several books and numerous articles. She is internationally recognized as an expert in the field of workplace behavior. With over twenty years of experience in human resources development, she is a frequently invited guest on talk radio, television, conferences, corporate workshops, and retreats.

Her work as a public speaker and consultant has provided Dr. Frankel with the privilege of serving such diverse clients as The Walt Disney Company, Candle Corporation, City of Pasadena, Amgen, Inc., Miller Brewing Company, McKinsey & Company, Inc., Lockheed Martin, Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, Los Angeles County Fire Department, International Family Entertainment/The Family Channel, The Hollywood Reporter, and many more. She also does pro bono consultation and workshops to nonprofit community agencies, including the Los Angeles Regional Food Bank, Caring for Babies with AIDS, and the Los Angeles Women's Foundation.

Dr. Frankel's books include, NICE GIRLS DON'T GET THE CORNER OFFICE: 101 Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers (Warner Books Hardcover; February 11, 2004; $ 19.95), Jump Start Your Career, Kindling the Spirit, Women, Anger, & Depression, and Overcoming Your Strengths, which was named "the best unsung business book of the year" in 1997 by Fast Company magazine.

As a member of the American Psychological Association, National Speakers Association, and the Society for Human Resources Management, Dr. Frankel is also a licensed psychotherapist with a doctorate in Counseling Psychology from the University of Southern California. Although originally from the East Coast, Dr. Frankel currently resides in Southern California.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

139 of 144 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: 101 Unconscious Mist March 17, 2004

By Wendy G. Anderson

Format:Hardcover

This book has been all that I hoped for and more. The book, in a nutshell, basically says that to get ahead in life, in career, in everything, women need to stop acting like little girls.

Replete with examples from Ms. Frankel's consulting clients, this book gives practical, no-holds-barred evaluations of such behaviours as feeding people at the office, working too hard, asking questions instead of making statements, and "asking permission." That last was a revelation to me.

As Ms. Frankel points out, we are all raised in a society that says you should get proper approvals before taking a step---any step. But men learn when to ask and when to just go ahead. Men learn how to apply the rubric "It's easier to get forgiveness than to get permission." Ms. Frankel pointes out that children, not adults, ask for permission to do perfectly rational things. I had never considered how detrimental to my career the habit of asking permission had been. But I decided to give Ms. Frankel's suggestions a try. I went to my boss and said, "I cannot come in on Friday." My boss looked nonplussed. I was petrified, but proud. I had done it. I had Made A Statement instead of Seeking Approval. And he didn't demur. He said, "Okay," and we went on with the day.

If you are feeling frustrated by the glass ceiling, if you feel stuck and can't figure out why you can't get further in your career ambitions (and if you're a female), this book is definitely worth the investment. It opened my eyes to things I did that I never even thought about, things that presented an image of an incompetent child---not a competent, composed, and capable woman. My image is now improving, and yours can too.

133 of 145 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars Sexual Sabotage March 17, 2004

By Joanna Daneman #1 HALL OF FAMETOP 10 REVIEWERVINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover

How to undo years of socialization of gender roles while working in business? This is a dilemma that women are facing as they push on the glass ceiling. What if the glass ceiling were as much self-created as part of corporate culture? These are some of the issues that Lois Frankel attempts to address in "Nice Girls."

Her analysis of gender training (such as Nice Girls Aren't Loud) are pretty much what I heard as a child. Yet...what a delicate line women must walk, as being tough is interpreted as bitchiness instead of hard-headed business savvy. So here's the problem; Frankel advises worrying less about being liked, advises apologizing sparingly -- not profusely and frequently, but that isn't the same as permission to have a take-no-prisoners attitude. While occasionally being disliked is going to be hard on women who work cooperatively and not in a hierarchical manner, Frankel explains why niceness may short-circuit the path to a deserved top spot.

While Frankel's book has excellent advice about avoiding subtle but destructive body language and practices like apologizing and making declarative statements into questions, as well as failing to blow one's own horn as needed, there are other books that explain the male-dominated playing field such as "Hardball for Women." It's not enough to understand our own failures to mesh into a world where men pretty much make the rules, it's also important to understand the rules thoroughly. "Rules favor the rulemakers, and when they don't, the rules are changed." Look at the troubles of Carly Fiorina and the attitudes towards Martha Stewart to see some of the pitfalls that can trap someone while following the advice in Frankel's book without understanding all the rules or new rules of behavior.

122 of 135 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars More Than Rosie the Riveter: March 17, 2004

By A.Trendl HungarianBookstore.com VINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover

Men are men. Women are women. Right? The matter of gender is easy enough to establish, but in Lois P. Frankel's book, "Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: 101 Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers" we learn there are underlying mores and premises to follow if women want to be at the top of a company. These rules are unspoken, but Frankel demystifies the process by which some women hurt their success by playing into the cultural roles prescribed to them growing up.

Frankel presumes most women grew up in a home that oppresses women from growing up into full adults. What may have been true for 1954 is not as true today. However, her challenge is still with merit, and in 2004, it crosses the gender barrier. e men should be taking notes from Frankel. There are plenty of little boys among us who need to work as men.

"Rosie the Riveter" ads during WWII encouraged women into the workplace, but often as factory and shipyard works. There was no "Annie the Accountant" or "Sally the CEO" campaigns. Being all you can be means being more than you were as a child. Frankel helps show how women can be more than little girls in the office place, and garner success as a result.

It is important to note that as much as this is an important book for women who esteem to be seen as professional should read, men also should read it. Not every man has reached his potential, and some fall to the same problems, in a masculine variation, as do some women. Fear, exhibited through the lack of initiative and an overborne, unnecessary kindness, holds many people back.

Objective, straightforwardness is much of what Frankel asserts....

Being professional doesn't mean you need to convert into a stomping intimidator, but it does mean being firm, not wincing when rejection is forthcoming, and thinking about more than immediate relationships. It is about getting the job done well, in concert with others, but never becoming weak while doing it all. You have expertise. You have training. You have what it takes.

Although Frankel is a professional coach, her book itself shows a coach is not needed. You need to be in control of your career, without worrying about the next person. Retain your ethics, your integrity and your aplomb, but it is your job to lead the way through your professional life. No parents, no coach, no friends are responsible for this.

I fully recommend "Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: 101 Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers"
by Lois P. Frankel. Follow it up with the classic Dale Carnegie book, "How To Win Friends And Influence People," to learn the other side of the professional relationship balance.

Anthony Trendl
editor, HungarianBookstore.com Read more ›