Nice Guys Don't Get Laid [Paperback]

Marcus P., Jr. Meleton (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: June 1993

Marcus Meleton returns to teach a new generation of Nice Guys how to become the disaster women ache for. It's been nearly a decade since his last media circuit which included guest spots on Geraldo, Montel, Leeza and over 1,000 radio interviews, but Meleton, who is now married with four kids, finally returns with a completely revised edition of Nice Guys Don t Get Laid.

Nice Guys Don't Get Laid sold out of two editions and is now updated, extended, and illustrated for today's new generation of Nice Guy. Much has changed in ten years, but one constant remains: Bad Boys continue to maul women while Nice Guys can hardly get a woman to text them.

Since the clean-cut, loyal, intelligent Nice Guy cannot even compete with a tattooed, philandering, unemployed Bad Boy, the Nice Guy has no choice but to transform himself into the disaster women crave and Nice Guys Don t Get Laid is just the book to aid in that transformation. Outside of turning Nice Guys into chick magnets, Meleton's satire has had unexpected consequences. His analysis is so effective that after reading his book women have responded by immediately dropping their Bad Boyfriend.

Meleton divides the male population into five groups - Mama s Boy, Mr. Nice Guy, Mr. Average, Mr. Bad Boy, and Mr. Psycho and he provides a test to determine where you or your significant other best fits. In the sections 8 Easy Ways to Stick a Machete Into a Relationship and Traps the Nice Guy Should Avoid Meleton gives us Nice Guy pitfalls. Meleton takes it a step further by providing the essentials in reprogramming the Nice Guy. His Brad Pitt Test immediately unveils the difference between the stench of rejection or a woman worth keeping. Meleton explains myths of female sexuality and diagrams a theory that will change your view of women forever. Being a firm believer in what a woman says is rarely what she really means, Meleton constructed translation guides for Nice Guys to decipher woman-speak. When a man hears a woman say you are my best friend, she really means I have no sexual interest in you . Or, "never change" means, you are so easy to use just the way you are.

Women plead, "where are all the Nice Guys," as they reward Bad Boys (rock stars, drug dealers, band members, gang leaders, and politicians) with their affection. You know when a woman is afflicted with, jerk-o-holism. She will talk about her mate, saying I'm the only one who understands him, when actually she is the only one who doesn t understand him or "my friends and family hate him," not quite realizing they have every reason to.

For men afflicted with Nice-Guy-Itis, Meleton's Bad Boy Instructional Manual should complete the Nice Guy transformation. Out with the NICE and in with the BAD. After reading Nice Guys Don't Get Laid, the Nice Guy will finally become the sexually attractive jerk women always wished he could be.

--This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Marcus Meleton is well known for his satire and humor/relationship books, drawing appearances nationally on Geraldo, Montel Williams, Leeza, and Playboy Channel. Coverage of his books include USA Today, Los Angeles Times, New York Times, Mens Fitness Magazine, Maxim, Dallas Morning News, San Francisco Examiner, Complete Woman Magazine, Publishers Weekly, Orange County Register, Fort Worth Morning Star, and Washington Times. He has been interviewed on over a 1,000 radio shows internationally including England, Canada, Australia, Switzerland, New Zealand, and Japan. Meleton's background is wildly varied. He was raised in Louisiana, surrounded by four sisters who left him utterly confused in dealing with women. Marcus has a degree in Computer Science from the University of Louisiana (a degree known for its rabid womanizers). He has an MBA from the University of Georgia. Employment encompasses Air Force Officer, Editor of Home Business Magazine, University Cop and over 20 years in the Aerospace industry. He currently has settled into real estate investment consulting. His books include Nice Guys Don't Get Laid, Hunting For Lawyers, Pete the P.O.'d Postal Worker and The Adventures of Liberal Man. Marcus is married to Marjorie and has four children (Brittany, Marcus III, Cole, and Anneleigh) and resides in Houston, Texas. --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

Product Details

• Paperback: 93 pages
• Publisher: Sharkbait Press (June 1993)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0963582607
• ISBN-13: 978-0963582607
• Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.3 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (39 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,194,447 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

28 of 29 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A much-needed rebuttal to polite conventional wisdom, October 18, 1998

By A Customer

This review is from: Nice Guys Don't Get Laid (Paperback)

Is Melleton right on with everything he says? No. But he is far closer to the truth than the conventional wisdom that women want a "sweet, kind, caring, sensitive" man. If you want proof, just open your eyes and look around. Look at the men the prettiest women are with. Look at the way they act. Look at their arrogance and abusiveness. Listen to their loud voices which betray no hint of interest in the feelings or opinions of other people. Then, look at the guys who can't get a date to save their life. By and large, they want nothing more than to treat a woman like a queen, but there are no takers. Of course, reality is complex, and absolute statements like "nice guys don't get laid" can never be completely accurate. But Melleton's work is a much-needed treatise nonetheless. He speaks for all the shy, insecure nice guys that women refuse to even acknowledge the existence of. And at the same time he slaps the hell out of those nice guys and says "wake up!". A man will not lead a healthy, fulfilling life by becoming a "Mr. Abuse", but neither will he be happy by living the life of a lovesick, put-upon "Mr. Nice Guy". A man needs a book like this to remind him of that.

17 of 18 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars The Nice Guy's Bible, December 3, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: Nice Guys Don't Get Laid (Paperback)

This is the funniest, saddest, truest work of nonfiction I've ever read. At age 23, I've never been on anything remotely resembling a date; without this book, I would still be wondering why.

21 of 24 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars ". . R.I.P. only in death will she realize my worth. . .", January 3, 2003

By 

ohwhatever (USA) - See all my reviews

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Nice Guys Don't Get Laid (Paperback)

I love this book. I had a string of really bad relationships and was always complaining to one of my guy-friends about them. He was a true Mr. Nice Guy. He got really sick of me, and suggested very "nicely" (as was always his fashion) that I read this book. No, I don't recommend following this book in order to get chicks, but I do recommend that some women read it very carefully. It's a comic book. No one likes to be lectured, but this book helps you take it a little easier. It also helps me recognize a Nice Guy when I see one, and now I'm married to one.