Customer Reviews

The No-Cry Nap Solution: Guaranteed Gentle Ways to Solve All Your Naptime Problems (Pantley)

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Did you know that studies have proven healthy sleep habits for your child now can directly impact their health for the rest of their lives? Or that a child not wanting a nap and not needing a nap are not one in the same?

But let's get real: While our intentions may be great, real life doesn't always allow for step-by-step approaches to getting our kids the daytime rest they need (and the sorely needed breaks we get while they nap!). Crabby kids, relatives popping in unannounced right before nap time, teething, upset bellies, that doctor appointment you can't miss, that 15 minute car nap that ruined little Johnny's afternoon siesta that led to an even more difficult bed time fight because he was so overtired...we've all been there, done that, and were all ready to pull out hair out by the end of the day.

There's a lot of great information in this book for parents of newborns through toddlerhood, and I made plenty of notes while I read. And there was also plenty of information that did not apply to our situation, some of which I skipped entirely and some of which I just skimmed (because I do plan on having another baby eventually!). But that is what is so great about Pantley's book: it's not a one-size-fit-all solution. Whether you co-sleep, nurse-to-sleep, stick to a by-the-clock schedule, or fly by the seat of your pants (like I do), you and your nap-fighting child will benefit greatly from the little bit of time it will take to sit down and read!

A few very important lessons I learned while reading Pantley's book included:

* My daughter needs 12 hours of sleep a night and 1 to 2 hours of nap time per day for 13 to 14 hours of sleep total. Oops! I had been cutting her short by about 2 hours. We have been working on remedying that situation and I am already noticing improvements.

* Night time sleep can help make up for naps but naps cannot make up for night time sleep.

* No matter what ANYONE tells you, newborns cannot be spoiled. So baby-wear, cuddle, and hug to your hearts content.

* I am not the worst mother in the world.

* What works for us is fine. A parenting expert says so. So if my daughter and I are happy with our she-holds-my-hand-until-she -falls-asleep-for-every-nap-and-bedtime situation, then so be it. It doesn't mean I am spoiling her and it doesn' mean I did something wrong. It just means that this is what is right for us. (I'm not sure why I needed an expert to tell me this to make me feel better, but thank you, Elizabeth. You don't know how much better this makes me feel.

Elizabeth Pantley's No-Cry Nap Solution, like her original No-Cry Sleep Solution is packed full of ideas for worn out parents. Pantley is not one to give up on a problem and nor is she is one to go on endlessly about `her philosophy' - Pantley is about practical, creative ideas which can be adapted to your own instincts as a mother. She is the reassuring maternal figure you're searching for as a bewildered new parent, the one who won't undermine your confidence and won't make you think your baby is some kind of failure. Pantley's books are as patient in their problem-solving as the sleepless night is long.

The No-Cry Nap Solution covers all the usual infant and toddler sleep pattern information and then moves on to tackling some thorny napping problems - catnaps, nap resistance, shifting schedules, changing from in-arms sleep to in-bed sleep, changing car naps to bed naps, making the transition from motion sleep to stationary sleep, and falling asleep without the nipple/bottle/dummy. The book has really hit the mark with its smorgasbord of nap problems and I'd be surprised if you're experiencing a nap problem that isn't covered here. Apart from raising four kids herself, all that research Pantley has done with parents around the world has paid off!

I read this book free of the fog of sleep deprivation, and there was a point I reached where I found myself thinking lighten up mothers, let it go, it all eventually turns out ok, you don't need to be so damn obsessive about your baby's sleep. And you know what, this thought could only ever be entertained by someone who is getting enough sleep in her life and you know what else? Pantley even has this covered - there is a section in her book with advice for those of you who decide to lighten up and let go with your motherhood routines.

But be warned, the book probably won't deliver instant miracles. There are no sleep miracles with babies. The truth is babies don't sleep or nap in a way that fits neatly into the modern parent's lifestyle. Unless you're exceptionally lucky there are going to be some problems (and they will involve a little crying). But the good news is they won't last forever. If you want to gently manoeuvre your way through them then the No-Cry series is the one for you. And just as The No-Cry Sleep Solution was desperately needed by sleep-deprived parents, I suspect The No-Cry Nap Solution will be just as desperately needed by energy-deprived parents. Because I still remember how precious nap time was - how your child's nap was the only time in a day where you got the opportunity to re-charge. It is something very much worth striving for. Go for it, buy the book.

What did I like best about this book? Well, this quote from page 22 is probably it:

"Address only those problems that are true problems to you, and don't create or imagine problems because someone else thinks you have them, no matter if that person is family, friend, or expert."

It's a wonderful reminder that problems are only problems if you think they are and then it's up to you to decide what to do about them. Wow. What a relief! You don't often hear that...as a parent. Usually everyone is trying to tell you what's wrong with how you do things.

My big concern was that my baby was nursing and then falling asleep for her naps. I thought this was a HUGE problem I had to fix. The thing was that I didn't feel like it was a problem; I just kept hearing that from various "expert" sources. Then, in the chapter on nursing to nap, Elizabeth says this:

"If your baby falls asleep nursing, drinking a bottle, or sucking a pacifier and then you are able to put him into bed where he takes a nice, long nap, then nothing needs to change." (page 154)

Another big sigh for me, as my baby was doing naps from 1 hour to over 2 hours in her crib or in our bed. Sure, sometimes the naps were shorter, but that was the exception and not the norm. And there was usually a good reason (such as a noise or the fact that she had had a longer nap earlier in the day and wasn't as tired).

After a lot of great general information on sleeping, napping, etc. in the first part of the book, there are then sections for newborns and older babies, as well as the types of challenges you are facing. You will not need to read the whole book to find solutions; you only need to read what's pertinent to you and your baby. What a great thing for time-constrained people like us parents!

The logs are great, especially the point of doing them every month or two rather than every week or two. This gives a more reasonable time for change and to see improvement. I did a log and came to the realization that the napping was going much better than I had thought. So, while it sometimes will help you spot the bad, the logging can also bring pleasant surprise. :) Still, I am trying some things and will do logs in a month or two to see if things have gotten better.

Lastly, one of my favorite things is that Elizabeth gets you to think of the less obvious, like does my baby sleep better with socks on or off? I hadn't thought to that level and thinking about things like that makes sense (and helps!)

This book, combined with the No-Cry Sleep Solution, have to be must-reads for any new parent to succeed in their new job of raising a happy, well-rested baby.

I purchased this book as well as "The No Cry Sleep Solution" because my 2 month old was taking very short naps lasting from 30-45 minutes. I know this wasn't good for a 2 month old because often times, she would be so cranky and fussy after she woke up from her catnap. This book helped me find a solution to this problem and now she naps for 1/5-3 hour stretches, waking up refreshed and ready to play. I have noticed less fussiness in her and she also sleeps longer at night time waking only 1 or 2 times for feedings then right back asleep. I am really happy to have found this book because I don't like the "cry it out" method that many parents I know use on their young children. This book has also taught me one valuable lesson and it is to put your baby down when drowsy, but not asleep. That way, they learn to soothe themselves to sleep. I have been doing this with my daughter for the past few days and it truly works. I'm always there with her in case she needs some singing or rocking, but there have been times that she just fell asleep on her own.

After reading both "No Cry" books, I have found the information in both books very redundant. I would suggest buying just one book and reading through it first and if it doesn't answer your questions then buy the next one. I recommend either book to any soon-to-be parents, new parents, and parents struggling with sleep issues. It is a must have!

I've read so many books trying to get help and ideas for getting my infant daughter to sleep in her bassinet and not with me. She just would have nothing to do with sleeping away from me. I tried to put her down "drowsy but awake," "in a near coma," completely limp and asleep....I tried it all. Getting her to take even a brief nap would take 90-120 mins of walking, bouncing, coaxing, and crying (both her and me!). I would get her about 2 inches from the mattress and she would tense up and wake up. I wanted to scream at all the authors of other books, "Start off with having your baby nap in her crib."..... Are you freakin kidding me?!?!?! I CAN'T GET NEAR THE CRIB!!!! If I did get her successfully in the bassinet, she would wake up 5-15 mins later. This book offers some real solutions for getting your baby to nap and sleep independently if that is what you want her to do. I was so stressed out by some of the other sleep books, they made me feel my baby would be ruined for life if I let her fall asleep while nursing. The author of this book made me relax.... It's ok if they fall asleep while nursing, there are actual techniques you can try to get your baby to get into that crib not just a blanket "start with naps in the crib" Arrrggghhhh!!!!! It's not a miracle solution and it still takes a lot of work, but we are making real progress. My little one is napping in her bassinet as I type. I am sitting right next to her waiting for the brief wake up..... Hoping and praying I can lull her back to sleep!

This book has been a life-saver for my husband and me! My son is almost 3 months old and has been having so much difficulty napping. His nighttime sleeping hasn't been too bad, but trying to get him to nap was torture for all involved. We couldn't get him to sleep on his own and if we did it would only last 20 minutes. He was constantly overtired and had severe mood swings. Being the primary caregiver during the day, I was left feeling helpless, inadequate, and drained by the time my husband came home from work. My sister-in-law gave me her copy of Pantley's other book "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" and once I saw that the Nap Solution book was available, my husband bought it immediately. Since reading this book, our son's napping has improved greatly. He is now able to sleep up to 3 hours at a time during the day. While he is not consistently napping the recommended amount of time during the day, he continues to improve. I would, and have, recommend this book to anyone who wants to help their child nap without using the cry-it-out method.

As with most parents, I read this book because I didn't enjoy the thought of leaving my little one to cry. Also, I started with this book (instead of her nighttime sleep book) because I felt my main problem was cat naps.

In brief (below is a more detailed explanation of the pros/cons list)

Pros:
short and easy to read
a few helpful suggestions
relatively guilt free
sleep charts

Cons:
no real plan
many suggestions are common sense or just plain fluff
uses little medical research to back her ideas
practically no guidance for people with serious sleep problems

Overall thoughts: As my title states, books that other mothers dub "cry it out" like Babywise (Ezzo) and Healthy Habits, Happy Child (Weissbluth) offer better suggestions and were much more helpful for me ... and I never used the cry it out approach. Weissbluth even agrees with Pantley's idea that cry-it-out will not work for all babies. He just offers it as a suggestion for parents willing and anxious to try it out.

This may be a good starting book for an expecting parent who has little experience with children, but if you are desperately and seriously looking for a solution to solve your child's sleep problems I'd look somewhere else. Just remember there is no one-size fits all program. Read several books and use the parts you like best. You are your child's expert.

***** Greater detail for those interested *****

I'll start with the good. I loved her suggestion to try lightly bouncing the baby's mattress in order to create the sense of "rocking to sleep." This totally worked for me. He still cried a bit at first, but I'd lay on the floor and sush and bounce and over the course of about a week there was no crying and no need to assist in putting to sleep. I was thrilled! After that success I decided I'd read the whole book. The other thing I appreciated was her approach. "You're not a bad mother if you have to rock or sing your baby to sleep. If it works for you and isn't a "problem" keep doing it." Reid is my first and I really didn't mind the time I spent putting him to sleep at night or for naps, and I noticed holding him through a nap or rocking him to sleep once or twice a week didn't mean he wouldn't go to sleep on his own the other 32 times. What a relief. I also liked her charts on appropriate sleep times and stages. Although, almost all books I've read on infant-sleep have similar charts.

Now, for the reason I don't "love" this book. Well, as my title states, I found books other moms have labeled "cry it out" or even "abuse" helped me find a no-cry sleep solution much easier and faster than either of Pantley's books did. Why? Well, a lot of her ideas are kind of common sense. She suggests a gradual removal of the sleep-to-suck association. You simply wait till baby is almost a sleep and then remove the breast or bottle and each day you gradually shorten the time for removal until baby can go to sleep without sucking. Really Pantley, you think you are the first person to come up with that idea? it's called weaning . . . it's been around for centuries. Also, her Pantley dance . . . I found "dancing" my child into his crib from my lab is just natural and common sense -- I don't need your very detailed (like 6 pages long) 8 step approach to teach me how to do this. Kind of fluff if you ask me. In fact, I'd tried a lot of her ideas long before I read her book (tracking sleep and moods through a chart, swaddling, etc) these ideas just felt like common sense when my baby started sleeping poorly.

Her main flaw may be that she has no real plan. I found other sleep books tell you to specifically follow an eat, play, sleep, eat, play sleep routine. Pantley tells you any sort of routine will do just fine. That wasn't so for me. If I put my little one down after eating he'd wake up in 20 minutes. This may work for others . . . but her really loose approach just offers too little guidance in comparison to other books. In her first book (which she refers to often in this book) she literally tells you to just pick a plan, any plan, and stick with it for 2 weeks and at the end of the two weeks see if it improved your situation. Well what if three days in things are worse? She offers very little guidance for parents with serious sleep problems.

She does talk about watching for sleep cues and trying an earlier bed time. But she doesn't go into great detail about either. I found Marc Wiessbluth's book (again, remember I never resorted to crying-it out) explained more appropriately why an early bedtime will help and why sleep cues are so important. He gave me the confidence I needed to trust my little one was tired and would sleep even if he was singing to himself and seemed alert when I laid him in the crib. Pantley had me constantly doubting myself because all her fluff makes it sound like anything and everything will work.

Overall, I think this nap book is much more helpful than her sleep solution book, so if you want to read a Pantley No-Cry book choose this one. But trust me when I say books like Babywise (Ezzro) and Healthy Habits, Happy Child (Weissbluth) were much more useful. I repeat, I did not use cry it out theories to "sleep train" my little one but those books were MUCH more helpful than this one. In fact, both those authors say cry-it-out won't work for everyone. They just offer it as one more solution. Ultimately, you're the parent that decides what suggestions you are going to try. For me, Pantley's aren't earth shattering. I preferred books written by real medical professionals using lots of medical research and more specific plans.

I am a first-time mother to a daughter who is 5 months old. She is a wonderful night sleeper, but a terrible napper. She is not your typical easy-going baby either.... so she desperately needs her naps! She takes "power naps," or as Pantley calls them "Catnaps," just fine... and I thought. "well, I suppose that's all she needs." Even though deep down I just knew she was still tired and would really benefit from a longer nap. I had never been able to get her to nap longer than 25-30 minutes in her crib, and no more than 45-50 minutes in my arms. And even when she did take a nap in her crib, she would often cry for a long time before falling asleep - when I say cry - I mean CRY! It killed me:-( And I usually ended up taking her out and just holding her.


I was so tired of people (and authors) telling me to let her cry it out! I never felt good about that, and it never worked for us! For a baby to cry for more than 30 minutes... something is just not right. When I did some research and found Elizabeth Pantley's book/website, I thought, "FINALLY an author who writes about NOT crying!" After going all over town to various book stores... I finally found the "No Cry Nap Solution"... I read it all THAT NIGHT! Need less to say, my daughter soundly sleeps for two naps a day. Oh, and the naps are anywhere from 80 to over 90 minutes long EACH, which I never dreamed would happen. She naps in her car seat, which is in her stroller (and yes, I brought it in the house)... but it works! I feel like if I can get her body used to napping longer, then we'll work on the location LATER!


Ok, I need to get some non-baby things done around the house while she sleeps.. but I just wanted to quickly send a big THANK YOU from my home to yours:-)

Are you the kind of parent who doesn't have the heart to let your baby cry it out? But also don't want your baby's needs to hold you hostage? Elizabeth Pantley's no-cry approach offers a much-needed third way. Her pragmatic, non-dogmatic common-sense approach allows parents to find compromise solutions that meet the needs of both parents and child.

Thanks to Elizabeth Pantley's advice everybody is happy: baby is getting more sleep and parents have some much-needed downtime during the day.

I did the nap log for a week just like the book illustrates and it really helped me find a pattern to our little ones naps. Once I figured that out I found I could easily tackle all the smaller problems we were encountering. We now have a more well-rested baby on our hands. She is even sleeping through the night and taking three to four naps a day. I have used each bit of advice on soothing and lengthening her naps and its really worked. Elizabeth knows her stuff! The best part is that all of it was done without fuss from our baby. It is all about looking for cues from your child, focusing and paying attention even when you don't think you have the time to do so. In my sleep deprived state and with a toddler on my hands I needed this book bad. I wish I could give Elizabeth a big hug for bringing some sanity back into our home!