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282 of 288 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Thank god this book exists!!!
I read "The no-cry sleep solution", and loved it, but I was needed something for my now toddler who is presenting a million new problems. The most wonderful thing about this book is that it asks you questions in a non-judgemental way that then allow you to assess your situation, and decide if you really need to make a change, then it gives you a variety of solutions...
Published on May 31, 2005 by C. E. Lawrenson

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10 of 11 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Useful but not successful (for me)
I did learn an awful lot from this book, like for instance: even though I thought I knew when my baby was tired, I had no idea that the instant he starting showing sleep cues, bedtime needed to happen. I thought (before reading this book) "Oh wow, he's so tired at 6:30, that by 9:00 he's going to be out like a light in the blink of an eye" Then I'd start putting him down...
Published on November 26, 2011 by Deborah D. Moeder


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282 of 288 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Thank god this book exists!!!, May 31, 2005
By 
C. E. Lawrenson "hela_monster" (San Francisco, CA United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
I read "The no-cry sleep solution", and loved it, but I was needed something for my now toddler who is presenting a million new problems. The most wonderful thing about this book is that it asks you questions in a non-judgemental way that then allow you to assess your situation, and decide if you really need to make a change, then it gives you a variety of solutions. The author points out that there is no one size fits all solution, and then she goes on to give you many gentle and loving options. If the cry it out method worked for you, you wouldn't be reading this review, now would you??? I'm not aware of any sleep books that deal specifically with older children, other than this . All the ones I know of deal with 6 month old babies, and I found most to be unacceptable for a toddler dealing with separation anxiety. This book however, talks about many individual sleep problems including separation anxiety, how to move to their own bed, nightmares, waking too early, daylight savings time, teething, non-nappers, trips to the parent's bed... The list goes on and on. One more wonderful thing about this book is that the author did more of a scientific study on the matter. She interviewed over a 1000 families, and then had over 200 "test mommies" to work out her sleep theories. She also refers to the Sleep in America polls, and refers to the current leading sleep expert at Stanford (not Ferber). Instead of just giving her opinions on what worked for her own children (she has 4), she actually asks other families and does research. Despite my own personal objections to Ferberizing, she makes no judgements like that, everything she says is loving and encouraging.

Just for the record, you're not alone. Here's an excerpt from the book taken out of the Sleep in America Poll:

Toddlers wake up:

3 or more times a night (4%)

2 x a night (5%)

1 x a night (38%)

in other words, 47% of toddlers wake up at least once per night and need a parent to fall back asleep. This is including all sleep techniques.

Preschoolers:

3 or more times a night (2%)

2 x a night (3%)

1 x a night (31%)

in other words, 36% of preschoolers wake up at least once per night and need a parent to fall back asleep.

She then goes on to say that "it is perfectly natural, absolutely normal, and totally expected for your toddler or preschooler to wake up in the night and need your help to fall back asleep. Sleeping all through the night, every night, without needing a parent's assistance is like learning to walk or talk or drink from a cup - all kids get there, but they do so at their own speed, a little at a time, and in their own unique way. I promise I won't leave you dangling there, just because something is normal doesn't mean you have to simply live with it until things change on their own."

I won't lie, if you want immediate results in a matter of days, this is not the book for you. However, if you'd like to teach your child to sleep in a loving, gentle, compassionate (and thus slow) way, this book will help you get there. I've been practicing the ideas in this book for a few days, and already I'm seeing some improvements. It has many creative ways to communicate with your child your wishes for sleep. Like - make a book with pictures of your bedtime routine, and a picture of your child sleeping in his own crib, then cuddled by his parents in the morning...

Good luck, and hope you get to sleeping better!

-Charis
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99 of 107 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Help and encouragement have arrived, June 17, 2005
By 
Oleanna (Minneapolis, MN United States) - See all my reviews
After thousands of years, one would suppose appropriate sleep routines would be ingrained in our traditional childrearing practices, but somehow we've lapsed, so it's fortunate Elizabeth Pantley felt called to retrain us in mindful, deliberate ways to support children's healthful rest.

Following her insightful, reliable guide to helping babies settle into sleep better (No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night 2002), Pantley presents the next step, a fresh look at sleep issues with practical, logical help for parents of older children.

She gives sound information, wise, caring opinions, and down-to-earth strategies such as her "gentle removal plan" and morning fairy rewards, but no harsh, extinction-based or cry-it-out "programs" to follow. With respect for children and parents, in understandable, friendly language, she explains basic normal sleep patterns and problems, lays out how to develop customized "sleep plans," and offers general tips, precautions, and a variety of options parents might consider.

Her material is well organized with a useful table of contents and extensive index, and she covers, in detail, aspects of sleep other resources overlook. The topic of nursing toddlers at bedtime, for example, is treated with specific step-by-step advice. Again and again, Pantley provides the prep work for parents' decisionmaking with multifaceted, cogent overviews, such as the evaluation of mechanics, construction, and coziness of beds and cribs including child preferences and participation, safety, bedding, allergens, placement and environment.

In a positive, sympathetic manner, she knowledgeably assists readers thinking through such subjects as schedules, napping, waking, dreams, fears, tooth grinding, bed-wetting, separation, transferring beds, adoption, twins, snoring, normal problems vs actual disorders, and daylight saving changes. With brevity and substance, she jogs parents' awareness to help them work out their own choices for their own families.

Pantley is a dedicated researcher with a mother's perspective who converts what she studies into accessible, compassionate guidance with real life application. She has a gift for clarity and is responsible about facts and data, as evidenced by her approach to putting the book together: Forty-four volunteer test families around the world, of varied configurations, read her initial manuscript and followed Pantley's directions, reporting back to let her "peek into their naptime and bedtime routines, problems and successes," and 245 families completed extensive sleep surveys. (Interesting snapshots of some of their sleeping children in various circumstances- a two-year-old's feet extended over the top of carpeted stairs, siblings entwined, sound asleep fathers snuggling, a three year old tipped forward from an upholstered chair onto a foot stool- are interspersed among the text, a sweet touch.)

As in her other encouraging works, Pantley puts her heart into this one. The understanding and patience she imparts diminish parental frustration and the versatile selection of practical ideas helps families handle challenging adjustments sensibly.

The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers should become a basic parenting standby.
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47 of 52 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Brilliant book about sleep!, May 13, 2005
This is the most complete and useful book I've seen on the topic. It includes a section of general information call Sleep Tips for Every Child which includes very practical and easy to use ideas and how to implement them. Has an extensive section that covers particular problems such as night waking, bedtime battles, and what to do when a child needs mommy or daddy to fall asleep. GREAT chapters on naps; making the transition from the family bed; and moving from the crib to a bed. Unique and wonderfully gentle ideas for night weaning a toddler. A cheerful book that is easy to read and even has lots of adorable sleeping toddler photos. Very highly recommended.
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49 of 55 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars This is a must for any parents with toddlers, April 6, 2006
I read countless books on sleeping out of desperation. I've met a few parents who think they have all the answers to the sleep problem and they have only one child who happened to be 'not normal' and sleep well. I wish I had read this book much earlier. I tried cry-out methods (and there're many variations) and they only work temporarily. Everytime we sleep over at our in-laws, one of them get sick, or something changed, we had to go through the horrible cry-out methods over and over again. I've been thinking I am not persistent and can't control my own kids (I have two boys 4 & 2 1/2). While reading this book, I assessed my kids' sleep habits and was relieved they're normal and getting enough sleep. I just needed to adjust a few little things and even before I finished the book, everyone (including myself!) started sleeping better at night. Night routines are much more pleasant. Of course, there are nights they wake up and come to get me, but armed with helpful information, I can deal with it much more effectively and everyone quickly goes back to sleep. I feel much happier since I am getting better sleep at nights. We're expecting our third and I am going to read her book on babies.
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35 of 40 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Well-written book, July 12, 2005
By 
Reader "Reader" (Montgomery, AL USA) - See all my reviews
Before I had a baby, I did not realize that there were two schools of thought regarding how to get children to sleep through the night. If you are like me, the thought of letting your child "cry it out," like some doctors will advocate, sounded incredibly harsh. There had to be a better way of teaching your baby to sleep.

Elizabeth Pantley does just that in her book. Her research includes real mothers, real experiences, and their stories of successful sleeping.

My son had acid reflux for six long months and did not sleep through the night. When the acid reflux was no longer an issue, his sleeping patterns continued to be interrupted. Our pediatrician even told us that we had the right to "shut the door and let him cry." He had never been in his crib to sleep--instead, only in a bouncy seat to keep him upright because of the reflux. Why now, were we supposed to punish him for having had the reflux and having his sleep interrupted by putting him in his crib and letting him "cry it out?" I did not agree with this method. A friend having the same problem sent me this life-saver-of-a-book.

I soon realized that there was another VALID option to letting babies "cry it out." If you are looking for a loving, peaceful option, this is your book. It is not an overnight solution, but neither is "crying it out," contrary to popular belief. However, it does work and it has worked beautifully for me. My son is now sleeping through the night and I have Elizabeth Pantley and her well-written book to thank. Do yourself and your precious child a favor and buy this book.
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26 of 29 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A gentle, loving, way to solve your child's sleep issues, August 2, 2005
By 
Our 15 month old son has had difficulty sleeping since infancy. He suffered from acid reflux, regular runny noses and ear infections for several months as a baby and this had an impact on his ability to sleep well. He would scream when laid down in his cot and although he would quieten when lifted, he would then fight sleep for hours until he was so overtired, it was even more difficult for him to settle down to sleep. Although his health problems are behind him, the legacy of his sleep problems remain. We tried so many different ways of settling him to sleep and have him sleep through the night, including staying with him and the crying it out approach. Neither of them provided any particular level of success. Our older son, who has always slept well was our benchmark and when nothing we tried seemed to work with our younger son, we became confused, disillusioned, anxious and felt guilty about the way we were approaching our son's sleeptimes. Then I read Elizabeth Pantley's book and everything is beginning to turn around.
I liked it firstly because I had never seen a book focusing specifically on toddlers and pre-schoolers before and I was keen not to try and make suggestions made in other baby sleep books 'fit' around our toddler son. From its first pages, Elizabeth's advice is practical, gentle, loving and designed to suit a variety of family circumstances. She does not advocate a one size fits all approach, rather giving several suggestions to each particular sleep issue, which you can choose from based on your own particular family situation. Nor does she suggest that her advice will offer a quick fix solution to your child's sleep difficulties. Persistence and patience are required, however, if like us, you have persisted with other methods which haven't worked, these gentle, more loving solutions are much easier to follow and will hopefully meet your child's needs and make you feel a lot better about yourself as a parent!
Her sleep logs can be printed and completed to give you a baseline on which to base your sleep plan. She gives 'Eight sleep tips for every child', before offering solutions for the widest variety of invidual sleep difficulties. I read the book from cover to cover but you could just as easily dip in and out of chapters depending on what particular issues you are facing. Perhaps most importantly for us, Elizabeth's advice has allowed us to really listen to our son and as a result to meet his sleep needs far better than we were before. Despite the fact that we believed we had a consistent bedtime routine, which we had always followed for our older child, a few changes based on Elizabeth's advice have made bedtime a less stressful, more gentle, loving, fun and special time for us all as a family. Our son is settling to sleep quicker and without tears and is sleeping longer through the night. If you have a toddler or pre-schooler who has difficulty with sleep and as a result, so do you, then I recommend that you read this book!
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18 of 19 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Love it!, February 24, 2006
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I find this book even more helpful than the NCSS for Babies...mainly because toddlers and preschoolers are an easier age for sleep-training (at least in my house! LOL). Loads of helpful hints on making your little ones want to cozy up and, yes, fall asleep in their beds!

Written in a very non-judgmental tone, Pantley is helpful to every "type" of mother- those that like their children sleeping in their beds, those that are trying to get their kids to sleep in their own beds, those that have tried crying it out in the past, and those that would rather die.

Gentle but effective.
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20 of 22 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Commonsense solutions, June 2, 2005
In "The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers," Elizabeth Pantley sweeps through the clamor of parenting philosophies with commonsense solutions. Not sure how to solve your little one's sleep problem -- or if it's really a problem at all? Pantley provides objective, non-judgmental questions to help guide you toward answers that work for you, your child and your entire family. Her genuinely family-centered approach balances the demands of parents and children alike with respect, flexibility and humor. Pantley's inclusive strategies offer alternatives for all sorts of families and all sorts of parenting styles. You won't find a more realistic, practical approach to solving sleep dilemmas. -- Lisa Poisso, editor, Natural Family Online magazine (naturalfamilyonline.com)
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30 of 35 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars IT WORKS!!!!!!!!!, September 19, 2005
By 
I read both of these books (No-Cry for Babies and the No-Cry for Toddlers) when my son was about 9-months old and was waking about every 45 minutes to nurse. It got so bad that I was only getting about 15 minutes of sleep at a time thru the night!

After reading Ms Pantley's books and following the instructions, I am pleased to say that Evan is sleeping thru the night now!!! He sleeps for at least 8 hours a night and then goes back to sleep for another 2-3 hours. He will put himself to sleep and then stay asleep for the night. I am so grateful to have my nights back. Also, now that he can do this, I feel more confident to be able to go out and leave him with a sitter (which I couldn't do before) We were able to accomplish this within 2 weeks.

I wish I had read these books sooner! These are now my favorite baby shower gifts!!!!!
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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars It worked for us!, May 23, 2006
By 
Sara's mommy (King of Prussia, PA) - See all my reviews
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I highly recommend this book for anyone! It was our saving grace!

This book really, really helped us. Our daughter suddenly started to fuss during the night when she was 6 months old. She was not sleeping through the night which was a concern since sleep is so important for children. We all went sleep deprived for over a year and thought we tried everything.

We read this book and incorporated several ideas. Within one week our daughter was sleeping through the night, and so were we!

Our greatest thanks to Elizabeth Pantley!
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