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No Hope for Gomez!
 
 
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No Hope for Gomez! [Paperback]

Graham Parke (Author)
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (22 customer reviews)

Price: $10.95 & eligible for FREE Super Saver Shipping on orders over $25. Details
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Book Description

January 12, 2010
It's the age-old tale:
Boy meets girl.
Boy stalks girl.
Girl already has a stalker.
Boy becomes her stalker-stalker.

We've seen it all before, many times, but this time it's different. If only slightly. When Gomez Porter becomes a test subject in an experimental drug trial, he is asked to keep track of any strange experiences through a blog. What Gomez isn't ready for, is so many of his experiences suddenly seeming strange; the antiques dealer trying to buy his old tax papers, his neighbor boiling salamanders on his balcony at midnight, the super sexy lab assistant who falls for him but is unable to express herself in terms outside the realm of science. But when one of the trial participants turns up dead and another goes missing, Gomez begins to fear for his life. No longer sure who he can trust and which of his experiences are real and which merely drug induced illusions, he decides it's time to go underground and work out a devious plan.

Now, years later, his blogs have been recovered from a defunct server. For the first time we can find out firsthand what happened to Gomez as he takes us on a wild ride of discovery.

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Editorial Reviews

Review

Much of the richness of this book lies in its jocular conversational bantering and some extremely witty and clever writing. --Book Pleasures, March 4, 2010

Extremely witty and clever writing that contains keen insights into human nature. --California Chronicle

The antics in this book will leave the reader laughing. Graham Parke is a genius. --Readers Favorite

A quick and unputdownable read that flies in the face of reason, and smashes against the wall of detective novels. It's a Coens Brothers' film formatted in book form. --Book Review

A very funny book; a veritable page turner of nonstop laughs. Buy a copy and find out for yourself! --Reader Views

From the Inside Flap

Read an article about a group of mathematicians who developed a financial model to accurately compare apples and oranges.
Was stunned. Never thought I'd see the day.
Preliminary indications are that the model allows any two kinds of fruit to be compared, although guava still causes minor rounding errors.
Further testing is ongoing.

-- Gomez Porter, blogspace entry.

Blog note: They asked me to keep a blog. They told me to be meticulous and exact in reporting my experiences. Leave nothing out, they said, no matter how mundane or unimportant it may seem.
I have no idea what kind of drugs I'm on. It may be some new medicine, an anti-psychotic, or just a pain reliever. I have no way of knowing what kind of experiences would constitute effects or side effects. I update my blog daily, then let them sift through the mess to decide what's relevant and what's not. What's out of the ordinary and what expected.
Just write down everything, they said.

Blog entry: Slow afternoon at the antiques store. Spent most of my time updating my blog and reading the paper. Was burning time quite happily until I came across this article about a guy found near-dead in his apartment. Apparently he'd been comatose for the better part of a week.
Normally this kind of story doesn't affect me much. It might tickle the part of my brain in charge of morbid curiosity, it might stir up some momentary apprehension about living alone and dying unexpectedly, but then I'll realize this would bother my neighbors more than it would me, and I'll carry on with my day.
But this article had my hair standing up. Not only did I know the guy, I also had a sneaking suspicion about what happened to him. And, what was worse, I might be headed for the same fate!
Scanned the article quickly, looking for phrases that proved me wrong, snippets stating the cause of death to be completely natural and, if possible, even somewhat pleasant. I found no such thing. Had to buckle down and read the entire article carefully. When I reached the end, though, I was still none the wiser. So far, police had yet to release any information on the cause of the guy's collapse. They also declined to indicate whether foul play was suspected. There was nothing in the article to soothe my growing dread.

Blog entry: One of the things about blogging for the sake of identifying experiences that may be out of the ordinary and could, therefore, be effects or side effects of the drugs, while not knowing what kind of drugs you're on and thus not knowing what to expect as effects or side effects, is that you start noticing so many things being out of the ordinary.

Blog entry: So. Many. Things.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 194 pages
  • Publisher: Outskirts Press (January 12, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1432752480
  • ISBN-13: 978-1432752484
  • Product Dimensions: 8 x 5 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.5 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (22 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #732,666 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Graham Parke is responsible for a number of technical publications and has recently patented a self-folding map. He has been described as both a humanitarian and a pathological liar.

Convincing evidence to support either allegation has yet to be produced.

No Hope for Gomez! is his fiction debut.

Follow his blog at: www.grahamparke.blogspot.com

 

Customer Reviews

22 Reviews
5 star:
 (11)
4 star:
 (7)
3 star:
 (2)
2 star:
 (2)
1 star:    (0)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
4.2 out of 5 stars (22 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Delightfully odd, May 20, 2010
This review is from: No Hope for Gomez! (Paperback)
"It was like suddenly getting a glimpse of a giant invisible hand turning the world. You were not supposed to see those kind of things. You were not supposed to notice the machinery at work." - Gomez Porter

Cleverly presented as a series of blog entries, author Graham Parke's debut novel, No Hope For Gomez!, chronicles the experiences of Gomez Porter. Being rather unsuccessful at running the antiques store he inherited from his parents, primarily because he knows absolutely nothing about antiques, Gomez decides to earn some extra cash by participating in an experimental drug trial.

As part of the trial, Gomez is instructed to keep a detailed blog of his daily activities and experiences, especially anything strange he notices. One thing in particular that Gomez notices, though he doesn't find it at all strange, is how attracted he is to Dr. Hargrove, the scientist running the drug trial. In fact, he develops a mad crush on her and decides to devote all his time to winning her affection.

Dr. Hargrove, however, is already being stalked by someone so Gomez becomes her stalker's stalker in order to determine the stalker's identity and prove himself to Hargrove. Which he does, and an incredibly awkward romance ensues.

Things take a turn for the strange, if not downright disturbing, when one of Gomez's fellow drug trial participants turns up dead, and shortly thereafter the detective investigating the case goes missing. Dr. Hargrove assures Gomez that the drugs being used in the trial had nothing to do with the death, but when yet another participant dies Gomez believes he has no choice but to go off the grid and investigate for himself in order to get to the bottom of things.

Interspersed throughout Gomez's romance and investigation are the laugh-out-loud funny interactions he has with his decidedly left-of-center downstairs neighbor, Warren, an aspiring novelist, Hicks, the antiques store's sole employee, who has a "pathological fear of all things unpunctual" (At one point Gomez becomes so frustrated with Hicks' bizarre behavior that he puts him up for auction on eBay.), and the parade of oddball customers who frequent the antiques store.

Since it is known that Gomez is participating in an experimental drug trial, the reader is often left to wonder whether what is being relayed in his blog entries is real or the product of some drug-induced hallucination. After all, he can't possibly have actually heard Warren stir-frying hamsters in an enameled wok... can he? And surely no one really came into his antiques store wearing a three-piece suit accessorized with sandals and a sombrero covered in "I love pasteurized milk!" stickers, right?

No Hope For Gomez! is one of the most delightfully odd books I've ever had the pleasure to read. It's part humor, part mystery, part romance and entirely original. It was, in fact, like getting sucked down the rabbit hole into Gomezland, and what a wonderful world to visit it was! I won't spoil the book's ending by telling you whether or not there's ultimately hope for Gomez, but I can tell you that I most definitely hope for more books from Parke in the future.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Hilariously quirky mystery!, May 18, 2010
This review is from: No Hope for Gomez! (Paperback)
Interesting. That's the first thing that pops to mind when I try to describe this book. Definitely a different kind of book than I've ever read. But definitely one that held my interest through out the story.

This story should be perfect for us bloggers! Each chapter is written in the style of blog entries. Too cute! But what held me the most was the humor and twist of mystery that Parke adds. Wow! Parke is a talented author who really knows how to create a quirky page turning story that will keep you laughing until the end.

Gomez's character was HILARIOUS! He really had me rolling with laughter throughout! I was intrigued from the interesting start all the way to the quirky ending. There was some language but nothing like alot of the books out there today. It's mild compared to them. There was also some undetailed (thank goodness!) mentions of sex, but again, nothing like some of the books out there. Overall, I enjoyed this crazy, funny, book about antique dealers, experimental drugs, mystery and love.

A 4 star praise to Mr. Graham Parke for a hilariously mysterious comedy!
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Bridget's Review, May 17, 2010
This review is from: No Hope for Gomez! (Paperback)

Gomez has become an experimental lab rat. He is required to blog about any sudden changes in the way he feels. Gomez had no idea just how crazy this drug would make him. He shares his predicament with on the world wide web for all to read.

He begins to wonder if taking part in this trial was a good idea. He gets his answer when one of the other people taking part winds up dead. Unable to decipher between reality and the feelings brought on by the drugs, Gomez is facing a huge turning point in his life. Will he have the strength and will to survive or will he give up?

This book is different than any other book I have read. The way the author speaks through his characters and builds up suspense is really intriguing. When you read this you will want to be able to read it all in one sitting because you won't be able to put it down.
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