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No More Mr. Nice Guy [Kindle Edition]

Robert Glover
4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (401 customer reviews)

Print List Price: $18.95
Kindle Price: $9.99
You Save: $8.96 (47%)

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Book Description

This controversial e-book phenomenon became a best-seller and landed its author, a certified marriage and family therapist, on The O'Reilly Factor and the Rush Limbaugh radio show. Dr. Robert Glover has devoted his career as a psychotherapist to freeing men from what he was dubbed the "Nice Guy Syndrome"-trying too hard to please others while neglecting their own needs, thus causing unhappiness and resentfulness. It's no wonder that unfulfilled Nice Guys lash out in frustration at their loved ones, claims Dr. Glover. He explains how they can stop seeking approval and start getting what they want in life, by presenting the information and tools to help them ensure their needs are met, to express their emotions, to have a satisfying sex life, to embrace their masculinity and form meaningful relationships with other men, and to live up to their creative potential.


Product Details

  • File Size: 348 KB
  • Print Length: 192 pages
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B004C438CW
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #6,947 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
422 of 448 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great book! Highly recommended! January 9, 2007
By Wazu
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
No More Mr. Nice Guy is a GREAT book However, the title is misleading, the purpose of the book is to boost confidence and help men reclaim power in their lives, it does not make men jerks. The author points out that you are the only person on this planet responsible for your needs, wants, and happiness. By boosting a man's confidence and ensuring the man's needs are met, women are naturally more attractive to these men. The greatest aphrodisiac is self-confidence.

The characteristics of "Nice Guys" are men who have difficulty setting boundaries in relationships with women and become doormats. The men often feel as helpless victims and seeing another person as the cause of problems. Many nice guys live life trying to gain approval for others.

Many nice guys did not have their needs met as boys. As a coping mechanism to try to get their needs met, they try to be nice. Later in life, Nice Guys apply the skills learned as a boy in dealing with women - by being nice - it does not work. When being nice does not work, the Nice Guys try to be even nicer.

Men need to set healthy boundaries in relationships with women. Avoiding conflicts in relationships is problematic - Women do not feel safe with a man they know they can push around. A woman wants to know you will stand up to her. That is how she will feel secure in the relationship. There is a catch - she has to test to see if she can trust you. When you set a boundary, she may strongly test and push against the boundary. She will tell you that you are wrong for having the boundary and do her best to find out if the boundary is for real. Generally, when women feel secure, they feel loved. When a man stands up to a woman, she believes he will likely stand up for her.
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199 of 215 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Life-changing September 28, 2003
By A Customer
Format:Hardcover
So far, reviewers aren't doing this book justice. I picked it up six months ago and was amazed at how well it described my plight as a "nice guy" (a.k.a. codependent). I've read stacks of self-help books, but this one stands above the rest. I mean it, it stands out, by far. And several guys I know who've read the book feel the same way.
This book fully described what I've been going through, told me how things got to be this way, and gave me concrete steps on how to change things. Since I've read it, my life has improved, I feel better, more powerful, and people are responding to me in a new way. If you're a guy walking through life feeling frustrated that you don't get the love, respect, and sex you deserve, you owe it to yourself to read this book.
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456 of 512 people found the following review helpful
Format:Hardcover
This book is, in many ways, highly flawed. I cannot, however, rate it any lower than three stars because the core behaviors Dr. Glover advocates are fundamental pillars of psychological well-being. His core premise is that all human beings have needs. Among these are somatic needs (food, shelter, treatment for injury, etc.) and emotional/psychological needs (love, validation, affection, etc.). For one reason or another, however, many men have come to habitually avoid pursuing or expressing these needs and desires in a direct way. Thus, "Nice Guy syndrome" is characterized by attempts to satisfy those needs by indirect means. Glover describes some of the more pervasive behaviors: a superficial niceness (in which one does something nice with the unconscious assumption that he will get something in return - "hidden contracts" as Glover dubs them), passive aggression, and other means of manipulation. Of course, these tactics are most often ineffective and leave the man frustrated and needy. Oftentimes, these desires are rechanneled (into things like porn or drug addiction) or repressed (only to emerge in an irrational or misdirected show of aggression or an emotional breakdown).

Glover encourages the individual to take an assertive role in getting his needs met. He does not mince words, and says outright "you are the only person responsible for meeting your own needs." And the best way to make sure this happens is to take the direct route: express outright and honestly what it is you want, make your own needs a priority, and then pursue them (or ask for help). This is, of course, sound and commonsense psychology.
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46 of 51 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A good book, by any standard. March 4, 2004
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
No More Mr. Nice Guy was the perfect book for me. As a former Nice Guy who was depressed and suicidal for many years, this book changed (and possibly saved) my life.
A lot of it is not for everyone. The book very specifically it targets males who seek approval from others (mostly women) for all the wrong reasons, and seeks to help them overcome this unhealthy behavior. Part of the book describes common approval-seeking behaviors, part of it goes into the (mostly Freudian) psychology behind why the author thinks that some men behave this way, and part of the book gives exercises with which to help Nice Guys get over their problem and get what they want from life. There are plenty of real-men examples, too, to compare yourself against.
One of the fundamental premises behind being a Nice Guy is that you feel that something is inherently wrong with you and your life and there is something that you must do or find or something out there that will make your life work somehow. If that describes the way you think, by all means buy this book. If not, you can still get some good use out of the common approval-seeking behaviors and psychology stuff. It's interesting to see how many people out there really do things for approval.
The method to get over it works, if you can make yourself do it. It's not an easy thing to deal with. I know.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book with exact and precise clarification and insight into...
Excellent book with exact and precise clarification and insight into the " Nice Guy " syndrome and why a lot of us are the way that we are.
Published 4 days ago by Arvis Fields
4.0 out of 5 stars Four Stars
Great book. Cleared up a lot for me.
Published 6 days ago by Kwame
5.0 out of 5 stars A Life Changer
First, thing you should know is it's a workbook. Let me be honest with my experience. I was skeptical, I read it once already without doing much of the written work in it... Read more
Published 7 days ago by Jeremy Weber
5.0 out of 5 stars When being "Nice" is hurting you or someone else.
Every guy that thinks he is being more fair and considerate than some men, needs to read this book. There is also a web site with the same name for men to post questions and... Read more
Published 7 days ago by James Lewis
4.0 out of 5 stars Four Stars
Eye opening
Published 8 days ago by llbll7
5.0 out of 5 stars Nice guy is the icing on my recovery "cake"
No More Mr. Nice guy is the icing on my recovery "cake". This book showed me my motivation to act like a Jerk even though I desperately sought acceptance. Read more
Published 8 days ago by Burt Nicoll
1.0 out of 5 stars One Star
No good
Published 8 days ago by hanson
5.0 out of 5 stars A Life-saver read
I found this book without directly searching for it but its title spoke to me right away, so I ordered it without hesitation. Read more
Published 17 days ago by Cyrille de Nervaux
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Best Book I have ever read.
Published 17 days ago by Lee Kyle
5.0 out of 5 stars Eye opening for any guy who grew up with a ...
Eye opening for any guy who grew up with a female head of household (male lacking authority) or absent father figure.
Published 19 days ago by Corey Schuetz
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