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No More Mr. Nice Guy [Kindle Edition]

Robert Glover
4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (433 customer reviews)

Print List Price: $18.95
Kindle Price: $9.99
You Save: $8.96 (47%)

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O's Little Book of Happiness
"O's Little Book of Happiness"
A collection of thoughtful and affecting writing on happiness-the first in a series of inspirational books from O. Magazine. Learn more | More in Self-Help

Book Description

This controversial e-book phenomenon became a best-seller and landed its author, a certified marriage and family therapist, on The O'Reilly Factor and the Rush Limbaugh radio show. Dr. Robert Glover has devoted his career as a psychotherapist to freeing men from what he was dubbed the "Nice Guy Syndrome"-trying too hard to please others while neglecting their own needs, thus causing unhappiness and resentfulness. It's no wonder that unfulfilled Nice Guys lash out in frustration at their loved ones, claims Dr. Glover. He explains how they can stop seeking approval and start getting what they want in life, by presenting the information and tools to help them ensure their needs are met, to express their emotions, to have a satisfying sex life, to embrace their masculinity and form meaningful relationships with other men, and to live up to their creative potential.


Product Details

  • File Size: 348 KB
  • Print Length: 192 pages
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B004C438CW
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #6,065 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
446 of 474 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great book! Highly recommended! January 9, 2007
By Wazu
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
No More Mr. Nice Guy is a GREAT book However, the title is misleading, the purpose of the book is to boost confidence and help men reclaim power in their lives, it does not make men jerks. The author points out that you are the only person on this planet responsible for your needs, wants, and happiness. By boosting a man's confidence and ensuring the man's needs are met, women are naturally more attractive to these men. The greatest aphrodisiac is self-confidence.

The characteristics of "Nice Guys" are men who have difficulty setting boundaries in relationships with women and become doormats. The men often feel as helpless victims and seeing another person as the cause of problems. Many nice guys live life trying to gain approval for others.

Many nice guys did not have their needs met as boys. As a coping mechanism to try to get their needs met, they try to be nice. Later in life, Nice Guys apply the skills learned as a boy in dealing with women - by being nice - it does not work. When being nice does not work, the Nice Guys try to be even nicer.

Men need to set healthy boundaries in relationships with women. Avoiding conflicts in relationships is problematic - Women do not feel safe with a man they know they can push around. A woman wants to know you will stand up to her. That is how she will feel secure in the relationship. There is a catch - she has to test to see if she can trust you. When you set a boundary, she may strongly test and push against the boundary. She will tell you that you are wrong for having the boundary and do her best to find out if the boundary is for real. Generally, when women feel secure, they feel loved. When a man stands up to a woman, she believes he will likely stand up for her.
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208 of 225 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Life-changing September 28, 2003
By A Customer
Format:Hardcover
So far, reviewers aren't doing this book justice. I picked it up six months ago and was amazed at how well it described my plight as a "nice guy" (a.k.a. codependent). I've read stacks of self-help books, but this one stands above the rest. I mean it, it stands out, by far. And several guys I know who've read the book feel the same way.
This book fully described what I've been going through, told me how things got to be this way, and gave me concrete steps on how to change things. Since I've read it, my life has improved, I feel better, more powerful, and people are responding to me in a new way. If you're a guy walking through life feeling frustrated that you don't get the love, respect, and sex you deserve, you owe it to yourself to read this book.
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489 of 553 people found the following review helpful
Format:Hardcover
This book is, in many ways, highly flawed. I cannot, however, rate it any lower than three stars because the core behaviors Dr. Glover advocates are fundamental pillars of psychological well-being. His core premise is that all human beings have needs. Among these are somatic needs (food, shelter, treatment for injury, etc.) and emotional/psychological needs (love, validation, affection, etc.). For one reason or another, however, many men have come to habitually avoid pursuing or expressing these needs and desires in a direct way. Thus, "Nice Guy syndrome" is characterized by attempts to satisfy those needs by indirect means. Glover describes some of the more pervasive behaviors: a superficial niceness (in which one does something nice with the unconscious assumption that he will get something in return - "hidden contracts" as Glover dubs them), passive aggression, and other means of manipulation. Of course, these tactics are most often ineffective and leave the man frustrated and needy. Oftentimes, these desires are rechanneled (into things like porn or drug addiction) or repressed (only to emerge in an irrational or misdirected show of aggression or an emotional breakdown).

Glover encourages the individual to take an assertive role in getting his needs met. He does not mince words, and says outright "you are the only person responsible for meeting your own needs." And the best way to make sure this happens is to take the direct route: express outright and honestly what it is you want, make your own needs a priority, and then pursue them (or ask for help). This is, of course, sound and commonsense psychology.
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50 of 56 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A good book, by any standard. March 4, 2004
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
No More Mr. Nice Guy was the perfect book for me. As a former Nice Guy who was depressed and suicidal for many years, this book changed (and possibly saved) my life.
A lot of it is not for everyone. The book very specifically it targets males who seek approval from others (mostly women) for all the wrong reasons, and seeks to help them overcome this unhealthy behavior. Part of the book describes common approval-seeking behaviors, part of it goes into the (mostly Freudian) psychology behind why the author thinks that some men behave this way, and part of the book gives exercises with which to help Nice Guys get over their problem and get what they want from life. There are plenty of real-men examples, too, to compare yourself against.
One of the fundamental premises behind being a Nice Guy is that you feel that something is inherently wrong with you and your life and there is something that you must do or find or something out there that will make your life work somehow. If that describes the way you think, by all means buy this book. If not, you can still get some good use out of the common approval-seeking behaviors and psychology stuff. It's interesting to see how many people out there really do things for approval.
The method to get over it works, if you can make yourself do it. It's not an easy thing to deal with. I know.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars It took me 3 weeks to finish this book, but only 1 week to read it.
I was totally blown away by how well this book changed my life. It took me 3 weeks to finish this book, but only took me a week to read, the reason being is I opened the book, read... Read more
Published 6 days ago by Tommy
5.0 out of 5 stars very good points
not everything in here is perfect, as he will explain... but so much is spot on for me. i think the majority of guys will find some serious value from this. i recommend.
Published 8 days ago by Normal Guy
5.0 out of 5 stars I LOVE this book
I LOVE this book. this is a bit repetitous but it really changed my life. being a "nice guy" doesn't mean being a pushover.
Published 10 days ago by krusty
4.0 out of 5 stars The title is somewhat sarcastic. The book does explain why "Nice Guys"...
A good book. It enlightens men about the frustration that has plagued them since they were boys. Why do women always fall in love with the total douches? Buy the book. Read more
Published 11 days ago by John D Harris
4.0 out of 5 stars Over all a very good book, I found the description to be spot ...
Over all a very good book, I found the description to be spot on, I did take exception to the childhood abandonment fears as the primary cause of Nice Guy syndrome. Read more
Published 11 days ago by Jerry Hayley
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Wish I read this book 10 years ago.
Published 12 days ago by cedric
4.0 out of 5 stars This will help!
Works through who you are and what mistakes you may be repeating, if you're like me it's more than you think. This book helped me wrap my head around that. Read more
Published 14 days ago by Mr. T
5.0 out of 5 stars this book helps for those lost in thought.
Dr. Glover addresses the actions of a nice guy. And the book sounds really selfish if you are described as the nice guy in the book but with a deeper realization in your mind, you... Read more
Published 18 days ago by Ariel Tolentino
5.0 out of 5 stars Indispensable resource for the modern man.
This book is exactly what it is titled. A way for a man to find his power and give up the controlling image of approval seeking. Read more
Published 19 days ago by Dechen Thurman
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing!!
It's like my user's guide. This book is amazing. It has really opened up my eyes to "what's wrong" with me internally and points out not only what needs fixing, but helps... Read more
Published 20 days ago by D. Tanner
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