Customer Reviews

...Or Not to Be: A Collection of Suicide Notes

5 star:		(10)
4 star:		(6)
3 star:		(6)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

The suicide notes themselves as well as the similarities between them were quite interesting. The author's comments about the the narrow vision experienced by the suicicidal, while perhaps being psychologically accurate showed a complete lack of understandign of the emotional experiences of the depressed. His tone implied that he felt those who committed suicide were not intelligent enough to see any other way out of their situations. The author himself doesn't seem to have any idea about what it is like to feel so completely lost and desperate. The commentary was also rather repetitive and didn't seem to offer much insight other than the fact that suicidal people see no other way to end their suffering.

If you are interested in a book of suicide notes, you obviously have your reasons. And this is one of the few books that deals with such a controversial subject in such a blunt manner. But don't let the title fool you; this is not merely a collection of suicide notes. It's heavily peppered with Mr. Etkind's opinionated, self-righteous preaching.

This wears on the reader's nerves quickly. At times Etkind ridicules suicide notes for being inadequate or incoherent. I quote (from page 1): "If someone could think clearly enough to leave a cogent note, that person would probably be able to recognize that suicide was a bad idea."

I'm sure we would all love to be spared the sophomoric, non-scientific statements and instead be allowed to form our own opinions based on what the book advertises: "a collection of suicide notes" (not "Etkind's beliefs on suicide"). Perhaps this book is ideal for someone who is desperately trying to escape the guilt of a loved one's suicide. It paints all suicidal people as confused, selfish souls who are 100% to blame for their tragic ends. How convenient that philosophy is for those left living.

My technical criticism of the book is this: the book is fragmented and insufficient. Full names are rarely given, thus preventing the reader from researching matters further. The suicide notes are frequently abbreviated or condensed. In the "Acknowledgements" section, we learn that Etkind merely snipped and pasted from other books. So what we have here is the Cliff's Notes version, interesting if you have an hour to kill on the subway or in a doctor's office but little more than that. Whatever you do, don't pay $53 for this 114-page paperback book. I found it for $10, and even that is a stretch.

I rarely read anything. But this book was read in 5 days. It is so interesting and captivating to a manic-depressive as myself. To really look into the final words of people who saw no hope. The downfall was the editorial comments of author Mark Etkind. I enjoyed looking into the poetic/artistic meaning behing the words. He took everything at face value and with a grain of salt. It can become quite anoying. Other than that, it is a great book for anyone with an infatuation with death, and the romance of suicide.

If you're trying to understand the suicidal mind, this may not be
the best book. The notes may give some insight, but the interpretations are pretty much completely wrong. Etkind demonstrates absolutely no understanding of what makes people take their life; he classifies them as stupid, insane, and morally bankrupt. Short-sighted, irrational, and self-centered would be more accurate, and there's a world of difference.

If you have a fascination with death, this book may provide some titillation, but it comes from a very condemning point of view. There's a thought provoking chapter on the history of the suicide note, and the rest of the chapters are each dedicated more or less to a certain reason for committing suicide. Etkind's idea seems to be to go through the possible reasons and debunk them one by one. Because his understanding of people's reasons and mindsets is so weak, he does a pretty poor job, but it still could be offensive. He also throws in a fair amount of ridicule at the stupidity of notes in general - as if a secondary goal were to damp that impulse to leave a note.

The stories of people are the great part of this book. They're mostly short notes or excerpts with minimal back-story, but the humanity is incredible even in some of the shortest. The notes of the famous people are often less interesting than of the anonymous mass. Maybe they're hurt by being excerpted, or suffer from the incompleteness of the accompanying history.

Overall, a 3 because the book is inexpensive and an engaging read. The notes are the real stars here, and the factual background is interesting; the interpretetive passages are misguided and grating.

Etkind's collection of suicide notes is a cautious creature, timid to delve too deeply into the situations or mindsets surrounding the tragic losses it records. It strikes me as being far too concerned with moralizing and less involved in analyzing-- I am far more interested in why, psychologically, the notes have been written at all, and far less in why the author feels the writer is wrong to have acted out suicidal impulses.

I'm no proponent of suicide, but by merely skirting the difficult issues involved, and only stating the flaws in the writers' reasoning, Etkind fails to create an image of the minds at work behind them. This is what makes the book 'pornagraphy,' as the forward glibly states. It would not be so if it treated its subjects with more introspection. The question of 'why'-- the question of how these people thought and felt, is a far more interesting subject than merely the text of the notes themselves, and at the same time is the very thing Etkind seems unwilling to explore. There is an unreasoned trepidation here, that by exploring those thoughts he may somehow condone them.

I uncovered my copy of "...or not to be" beneath some shirts on my floor and leafed through it again. What struck me the first time I read this years ago and again today was the sad fact that this fascinating subject landed in the hands of such a terrible author. How he got this published, I'll never know.

While the notes in this book are interesting by their nature, Marc Etkind's commentary displays the depth of his ignorance of suicide as well as his disdain for it. In no way does this book touch upon the psychological, philosophical complexity of suicide. His interpretations, at best, are amateurish and void of meaning. At its worst, they are condescending and cruel. Here is the last sentence of the introduction to the book, written by Etkind -

"The following collection will allow the reader to decide just how good a correspondent the suicide note-writer really is."

Um, Mr. Etkind? This isn't a book about correspondence or letter writing 101. How far off base can this guy get? In the small biography about Etkind at the end of the book, it reads, "Marc Etkind has probably read more suicide notes than anyone else. This he does for enjoyment." (Then it talks about what he does for a living) If that doesn't tell you how cavalier his approach is to suicide, I don't know what will.

Clearly, the value of this book is the notes themselves. I regret this book wasn't written by someone who actually has an interest in suicide and suicide notes rather than childish enjoyment. It could have been very informative; to get a unique view into the minds of those who left by their own hand. Even if it had been purely for entertainment, lacking serious overtones, that could have worked too.

Marc Etkind is neither serious nor entertaining. He didn't bother to mask his contempt, bias or lack of understanding about suicide and it shows. Two stars. Both for the rare and interesting subject matter. As for Marc Etkind? His enjoyment in collecting these notes is anything but enjoyable for the reader. Read the notes and the backstories, they are compelling. Skip the rest.

First of all, I was surprised to see no notations throughout the book, which made me wonder about the validity of its contents. Secondly, the formatting, as in the pages' layout, of the book is horrible, and I could have come up with a nicer design in Microsoft Word. Another shortcoming I found particularly annoying in the first half of the book was its brevity of the notes and information on the victim. Some notes were extremely short with only a, "This clerk hung himself", and while this had a point (variety), I found myself completely disinterested in the actual note, having hardly any knowledge of the writer. When it came to the latter half of the book, notes got a least a paragraph or two of background, but the notes themselves were often excerpted down and lost some of their essence. Sure, it's understandable to prevent potential boredom and extraneous book length, but always necessary? Overall, I wasn't able to completely fulfill my voyeuristic desires of intimate histories and detailed suicide executions, was angered by the lack of information and research, and yet, in the end, found myself reading the collection in one sitting.

I read this book purely out of careful curiosity and was therefore mildly offended by Mark Etkind's initial comment about the reader..."you are a sadistic voyeur". I thought that was very inappropriate.

The content itself is definitely lacking and could have benefited from less commentary. I reached the end pages all too quickly, although not from enthusiasm. There is a good variety of notes included but simply not enough to allow one to become totally immersed. I found some of the notes to be incredibly sad and I felt they reinforced just how vain suicide can be.

This book gives you the choice to utter a callous chuckle as you flip the pages or to attempt empathising with those poor souls. Despite being brief and a rather sad read, it was interesting and quite useful in providing a glimpse into the mind and motive of a suicide. Valuable reference material.

This book is a great reference for those interested in suicide notes. Etkind, however, has too many unqualified comments and some of the notes could be found on the internet anyway.

I was walking through my local bookstore, looking for a certain book. When unable to find it, This one caught my eye. I am fascinated with death, myself, and the idea of writing the end to your own story is rather intriguing to me. So I bought it. I read it in less than a week, I am not a reader, I've been trying to read Aldous Huxley's A Brave New World for a year and half and am only on chapter 8. So you can tell this must be good, easy reading book. I had one problem. Mark Etkind's insight was offensinve to me. It seemed like he was trying too hard, and that he was a student of the idea, and never actually felt those feelings. However, he did give excellent historical notes, on types of suicide, and actual lives of certain people. Overall it is a good book, and would recommend it to anyone with any interest in, what is considered, morbid.